Telling Family
Notifications OFF
I didnt tell my sister when it happened last year, I couldn't talk about it to her as we have never been really that close and she never liked my partner anyway.
She has been meddling and found information online - she came to see me today and we had a massive row about it.
She stormed out and said she will see me when I am ready to apologise.
My niece won't speak to me either, doesn't want to see me until I apologise too.
Has anyone else been in this situation? Not sure what to do now.
She has been meddling and found information online - she came to see me today and we had a massive row about it.
She stormed out and said she will see me when I am ready to apologise.
My niece won't speak to me either, doesn't want to see me until I apologise too.
Has anyone else been in this situation? Not sure what to do now.
Don't forget that she's a year behind you with this information and it takes an awful long time to process. What would you have said to your sister if she had been in your shoes?
I have yet to tell anyone bar my immediate family (who have been great) so I don't have any advice.
Maybe one day your sister & niece will realise that support is more helpful than judgement??
sorry you've had to go through this
xx
I have yet to tell anyone bar my immediate family (who have been great) so I don't have any advice.
Maybe one day your sister & niece will realise that support is more helpful than judgement??
sorry you've had to go through this
xx
Elizabeth
k4 is right, you have to give her time to take this in and process it.
I've never been a big fan of people who throw down ultimatums involving being given an apology. That means they are telling the person how to feel, (ie you must show remorse)
I think it's very hard to experience lack of support, or worse, judgement from friends and family, those who we have always thought would be on your side. I haven't shared with my family yet (apart from my adult children) because I am fearful of the responses.
I think it helps to think about what your own response would be to someone before you found yourself in this sitiation
k4 is right, you have to give her time to take this in and process it.
I've never been a big fan of people who throw down ultimatums involving being given an apology. That means they are telling the person how to feel, (ie you must show remorse)
I think it's very hard to experience lack of support, or worse, judgement from friends and family, those who we have always thought would be on your side. I haven't shared with my family yet (apart from my adult children) because I am fearful of the responses.
I think it helps to think about what your own response would be to someone before you found yourself in this sitiation
Elizabeth
You have nothing to apologise for, give her time to adjust , its such a huge shock x
Totally understand why you didn't confide, why would we, this journey is horrendous and it takes it out of us,
Just remember that you have done nothing wrong apart from getting through each day as best as you can, maybe message her and point her to here to get a better understanding of this journey, no one can understand unless you have walked in our footsteps xx
You have nothing to apologise for, give her time to adjust , its such a huge shock x
Totally understand why you didn't confide, why would we, this journey is horrendous and it takes it out of us,
Just remember that you have done nothing wrong apart from getting through each day as best as you can, maybe message her and point her to here to get a better understanding of this journey, no one can understand unless you have walked in our footsteps xx
Thank you so much everyone, I really appreciate your support and thoughts.
xx
xx
You really do have to give people space. This journey is hell, especially at first - the immense shock of it all takes a long time to absorb. We all absorb it in different ways.
I think your sister/niece are not particularly angry at you but the situation - give them time then gently approach them, perhaps with a card.
I think your sister/niece are not particularly angry at you but the situation - give them time then gently approach them, perhaps with a card.