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Confused&worried

Member since
June 2022

326 posts

Posted Sat June 3, 2023 12:37pmReport post

Hi Ladies

I haven't been on the forum lately, for many reasons. Life is busy in a positive way meaning I'm distracted, our LFF risk assessment is looming and I'm burying my head in the sand about it, also I'm trying to conduct my life without the knock & it's fallout being in the foreground.

However, this weekend is extremely difficult for me and the only people who I know will understand are those in this community.

It's my children's First Holy Communions tomorrow. We're having a big celebration because they deserve it. Their daddy won't be there! The priest has asked that he does not attend the church due to the number of children in attendance, and his unpaid work lead will not let him leave early to attend the party.

Only immediate family know the situation so I'm going to have to lie to everyone else and my children, who won't understand. We're going to tell people that he has food poisoning and can't get put of bed.

I'm a bag of emotions and none of them are good. I just needed to reach out to the people who understand.

BaffledB

Member since
July 2021

876 posts

Posted Sat June 3, 2023 12:43pmReport post

Hey Confused,

Sending big loves and hugs to you.

I can't imagine how upsetting it is for you all that he won't be there and I know it won't be the same but what about organising a separate celebration and doing something nice? The weather is lovely so you could have a bbq or go for a meal somewhere to mark the occasion. A small intimate gathering with the both of you and the kids. Perhaps film the communion if you can or the most important parts and then you could all view it and get pizzas or something? At least then the kids will have something further to look forward to and hopefully it will create a nice memory in a time where it's filled with clouds. Xx

Edited Sat June 3, 2023 12:44pm

Inthemoment

Member since
February 2023

358 posts

Posted Sat June 3, 2023 2:50pmReport post

I'm so sorry to hear that. This is a situation I'll be facing in a few years. He's going to miss the birthday party this summer, the first nativity play, the holy communion a couple of years later...so many big events. Sending love and strength to you. I agree with the suggestion of a celebration later, maybe you could all get dressed up and have a photo at the church with the priest separately on a different day?

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2396 posts

Posted Sat June 3, 2023 3:45pmReport post

Aww Confused x

My heart really does go out to you I can't imagine how hard it will be for you and your children and also your OH xx

The strength you have that has got you this far will be with you tomorrow, as hard as it is you really do have this even though it doesn't feel like it today xx

Will you be recording the service by any chance? I ask because if you are then maybe after tomorrow you can do something together as a family and watch it together , just a thought xx

I wish you all the strength in the world for your child special day tomorrow xx

Look after yourself and know we will all have you in our thoughts standing by your side xx

Jayjay

Member since
December 2021

695 posts

Posted Sat June 3, 2023 5:06pmReport post

You're so brave, you're facing everyone and doing this for your kids so well done you. It's so bloody hard and everything we do involves great thought, but you are rocking this. I hope you have a fab day with your kids and family xx

Seaside

Member since
July 2022

560 posts

Posted Sat June 3, 2023 5:17pmReport post

Aahhh that is so hard for you would it be possible to film it and then have a celebration just with your OH and the children on another day?

I will be thinking of you tomorrow and virtually standing right next to you.

Lots of love and strength to you all xx

Green

Member since
June 2021

76 posts

Posted Sat June 3, 2023 5:36pmReport post

I was raised Catholic so I can sympathise with this greatly. What a milestone to miss.

Them again, there will be more milestones to come. Try to focus on those.

Big hugs my dear x

K4

Member since
October 2022

611 posts

Posted Sat June 3, 2023 6:02pmReport post

Big big hugs, I hope your nerves hold out and you're able to enjoy tomorrow



xx

Distressed and pregnant

Member since
November 2020

996 posts

Posted Sun June 4, 2023 6:17amReport post

Hi,

Thinking of you today. I hope the children have the best day. Love and strength to you all xxx

Newlady

Member since
April 2021

644 posts

Posted Sun June 4, 2023 5:08pmReport post

Bless you , I'm from this community and I know how important communion is I've went through it 3 times after my divorce was a nightmare, so I can't imagine how it is for you . Deep breaths. Hope all went well it's just another hurdle. Unfortunately there's many in this journay. Hold yourself high and be proud you can through it xx

Confused&worried

Member since
June 2022

326 posts

Posted Mon June 5, 2023 4:10pmReport post

Thank you all for your kind words.

It ended up being a lovely day, no-one question our excuse. Most importantly the kids had a great day.

Confused&worried

Member since
June 2022

326 posts

Posted Mon June 5, 2023 4:10pmReport post

Thank you all for your kind words.

It ended up being a lovely day, no-one question our excuse. Most importantly the kids had a great day.

River

Member since
April 2023

68 posts

Posted Tue June 6, 2023 11:40pmReport post

Confused,

Apologies I'm late to the post, but just read your update and I'm glad the day went as well as it could have done. Well done for getting through it. It can't have been an easy day for you. xx

Edited Tue June 6, 2023 11:41pm