Social services
Notifications OFF
Hi.
This is my first post but I have been lurking for a few months.
My partner declared a sexual attraction to children earlier this year. He has left the family home. I am now a single parent to our child.
Social services put a plan in place that my ex should only have supervised access to our child and not be involved with personal care. My ex sees our child once or twice a week under my supervision. Our case is closed to social services as they were happy our child was safe in my care.
My childs teacher had a word with me today as my child has been telling people at school that 'Daddy stays over sometimes'. This is not true! I think I reassured the staff that he doesn't stay over and I've had a little chat with our child about the importance of telling the truth.
Will the school report this to social services? Will social services believe me over my child? I'm worried. I thought I was starting to move on with my life, but this feels like a step back.
Anyone been in a similar situation? Any advice?
This is my first post but I have been lurking for a few months.
My partner declared a sexual attraction to children earlier this year. He has left the family home. I am now a single parent to our child.
Social services put a plan in place that my ex should only have supervised access to our child and not be involved with personal care. My ex sees our child once or twice a week under my supervision. Our case is closed to social services as they were happy our child was safe in my care.
My childs teacher had a word with me today as my child has been telling people at school that 'Daddy stays over sometimes'. This is not true! I think I reassured the staff that he doesn't stay over and I've had a little chat with our child about the importance of telling the truth.
Will the school report this to social services? Will social services believe me over my child? I'm worried. I thought I was starting to move on with my life, but this feels like a step back.
Anyone been in a similar situation? Any advice?
Hi that must be so difficult to of gone through. I'm in a different situation but my daughter has a learning disability and she told another student that me and my ex were getting back together and married and the school did phone to ask and did tell SS but they also told them that my daughter had a tendency to make things up because it's what she wants to happen. the school knows I'm not but the SW phoned and asked why my daughter said it and just told them literally what the school said nothing else has been said since and we are in the process of me doing supervised contact. Surely they have to understand young kids make stuff up sometimes. Did the school say they had no concerns and believed you were telling the truth ? My daughters school are very supportive and undands my daughters needs enough to know I wouldn't.
Hi,
My child did this, dad isn't, wasn't allowed to live at home, and she was having a discussion with some other children and wanted to fit in so told them her dad lives with us, school rang me to confirm that he wasn't, ( not gonna lie I was so annoyed bit I've been to hell back with ss, and how can u prove he isn't living with u, as he is here most of the time) any way I did confirm that he wasn't and she was happy and realised that she just wanted to fit in.
If you have a good relationship then they will ring u first and check it out, but if u haven't then I would be careful, I'm NOT SAYING they would but they might ring ss
How old is ur child mine was 7/8 at the time, but I have always been honest with them x
My child did this, dad isn't, wasn't allowed to live at home, and she was having a discussion with some other children and wanted to fit in so told them her dad lives with us, school rang me to confirm that he wasn't, ( not gonna lie I was so annoyed bit I've been to hell back with ss, and how can u prove he isn't living with u, as he is here most of the time) any way I did confirm that he wasn't and she was happy and realised that she just wanted to fit in.
If you have a good relationship then they will ring u first and check it out, but if u haven't then I would be careful, I'm NOT SAYING they would but they might ring ss
How old is ur child mine was 7/8 at the time, but I have always been honest with them x
They should tell you before making a referral but they're not legally obligated to
I think it's unlikely they will based on the info you've given, but they might
Social services would then probably give you a ring and ask you themselves and decide from there whether to do an assessment. There's a very small possibility of them sending someone out unannounced but I think that's highly unlikely in these circumstances and you can decline to let them in anyway.
If you let them in they'd want to speak to you, speak to the child alone, see the child's bedroom and will probably subtly scout the house out to see if there's evidence of your person living there. E.g. is there a man's deodorant, toothbrush etc.
I think it's unlikely they will based on the info you've given, but they might
Social services would then probably give you a ring and ask you themselves and decide from there whether to do an assessment. There's a very small possibility of them sending someone out unannounced but I think that's highly unlikely in these circumstances and you can decline to let them in anyway.
If you let them in they'd want to speak to you, speak to the child alone, see the child's bedroom and will probably subtly scout the house out to see if there's evidence of your person living there. E.g. is there a man's deodorant, toothbrush etc.
Thanks all very much for the replies. It's nice to know I'm not alone in this situation (although I wish no one was in it in the first place).
My child has only just turned 5 and is desperate for their Dad to come home. I've explained many times he won't be living with us again, but I guess it takes time to sink in. The teacher didn't say he was going to refer back to SS, but I have nothing to hide so if they turn up, they turn up.
I just hate the intrusion, I didn't do anything wrong and yet I'm the one under the microscope all the time. I was actually feeling better lately, but this has set me back a bit.
Anyway, your responses were much appreciated. Thank you.
My child has only just turned 5 and is desperate for their Dad to come home. I've explained many times he won't be living with us again, but I guess it takes time to sink in. The teacher didn't say he was going to refer back to SS, but I have nothing to hide so if they turn up, they turn up.
I just hate the intrusion, I didn't do anything wrong and yet I'm the one under the microscope all the time. I was actually feeling better lately, but this has set me back a bit.
Anyway, your responses were much appreciated. Thank you.