Dealing with loss - feeling angry!
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Hi All
It's been a fortnight since court and as I anticipated, the domino effect is taking place and our world is slowly falling apart. It made the news, so he has lost his job, which means the car has to go (need it for transporting children to appointments etc), the house could be next if he doesn't find a job, we're not exactly spring chickens plus he now has a criminal record.
A lot of you amazing people have had to rebuild their lives, just wondering how you got through this difficult and scary time? I am holding out for a change in fortunes, I feel such anger, but with three young children to look after, having to try and hold it together, but selfishly, all I can dream about is escaping the situation which is not of my making, I feel so cursed! It is because of our children that I am still functioning.
Any words of wisdom greatly appreciated. I hate feeling this way, I'm naturally a positive person.
Thanks for listening.
It's been a fortnight since court and as I anticipated, the domino effect is taking place and our world is slowly falling apart. It made the news, so he has lost his job, which means the car has to go (need it for transporting children to appointments etc), the house could be next if he doesn't find a job, we're not exactly spring chickens plus he now has a criminal record.
A lot of you amazing people have had to rebuild their lives, just wondering how you got through this difficult and scary time? I am holding out for a change in fortunes, I feel such anger, but with three young children to look after, having to try and hold it together, but selfishly, all I can dream about is escaping the situation which is not of my making, I feel so cursed! It is because of our children that I am still functioning.
Any words of wisdom greatly appreciated. I hate feeling this way, I'm naturally a positive person.
Thanks for listening.
Thank you so much Poster, I can't begin to tell you how much your response means to me and I will make the lists.
I am so grateful for our support network, where others don't always understand, we all do.
big hugs.
I am so grateful for our support network, where others don't always understand, we all do.
big hugs.
Poster, THANK YOU for your advice. The piece about lists makes absolute sense.
The situation with my partner hasn't changed over the last week, but my ability to cope has. Work for me has been horrendous, largely due to being judged by the owner of the business, so this week I handed my notice in and will be moving to a new role, where I don't intend to tell them anything about my situation. Secondly, I've been stressed due to the fact that our wedding was booked for this time next year and the cost to cancel was going to rinse us of money we need for legal fees, so instead of cancelling, I've managed to amend the date to further in the future, and we'll cross the bridge of cancelling and paying the fees at a later date, after all this is over. Two things which aren't directly to do with the situation, but which I've "ticked off" and I feel so much better about. I'd highly recommend compartmentalising areas of stress and dealing with any you can, as it makes it easier to deal with the areas that you can't control. Xx
The situation with my partner hasn't changed over the last week, but my ability to cope has. Work for me has been horrendous, largely due to being judged by the owner of the business, so this week I handed my notice in and will be moving to a new role, where I don't intend to tell them anything about my situation. Secondly, I've been stressed due to the fact that our wedding was booked for this time next year and the cost to cancel was going to rinse us of money we need for legal fees, so instead of cancelling, I've managed to amend the date to further in the future, and we'll cross the bridge of cancelling and paying the fees at a later date, after all this is over. Two things which aren't directly to do with the situation, but which I've "ticked off" and I feel so much better about. I'd highly recommend compartmentalising areas of stress and dealing with any you can, as it makes it easier to deal with the areas that you can't control. Xx
Sending you lots of hugs Crystal.
No one deserves what has happened to all us ladies on this forum, we are just trying to get on with our lives, keeping everything together. It makes my blood boil that other people are judgemental when they have absolutely no idea what we have to deal with every day.
You are amazing because you are keeping going, & the lists are such a good idea!
Remember if you are going thro hell, keep going.
Mabel x
No one deserves what has happened to all us ladies on this forum, we are just trying to get on with our lives, keeping everything together. It makes my blood boil that other people are judgemental when they have absolutely no idea what we have to deal with every day.
You are amazing because you are keeping going, & the lists are such a good idea!
Remember if you are going thro hell, keep going.
Mabel x
Thanks Mabel,
I love your advice about keeping on going through hell, I googled it and unsurprisingly it was Winston Churchill who said it. It made me feel much more galvanised and stronger, thanks for your kind words of encouragement, it all makes such a difference.
I honestly thought, like many of us do, that the day of sentencing would be the beginning of the end of this hideous process. This may have been naive anyway, but unfortunately husband's case made the news on a slow news day and the fallout has been absolutely tremendous.
Still, from here, I think the only way is up (hope I haven't spoken too soon!) And although it's horrible that people now know, I do feel a certain amount of relief that I'm not carrying this big secret alone anymore.
Thanks to everyone for all your support.
I love your advice about keeping on going through hell, I googled it and unsurprisingly it was Winston Churchill who said it. It made me feel much more galvanised and stronger, thanks for your kind words of encouragement, it all makes such a difference.
I honestly thought, like many of us do, that the day of sentencing would be the beginning of the end of this hideous process. This may have been naive anyway, but unfortunately husband's case made the news on a slow news day and the fallout has been absolutely tremendous.
Still, from here, I think the only way is up (hope I haven't spoken too soon!) And although it's horrible that people now know, I do feel a certain amount of relief that I'm not carrying this big secret alone anymore.
Thanks to everyone for all your support.