Family and Friends Forum

Oh Bitterbean,



Your body must be overloaded by the overwhelming nature of the situation. Look after yourself, I will be thinking of you.

Yes , initially my health really suffered. I was recovering from a knee replacement and the shock of everything put back my recovery. My arthritis was horrendous and every joint ached.I couldn't be bothered to do the exercises I was given. I also piled on over 2 stone . I also stopped bothering about skincare and wearing makeup. I feel like I've aged !!



I think people on here get cross with me because I'm so vehemently against my ex and want him to be punished. What he's done to me and the crime is unforgivable. So I've left for 2 reasons:

1. I can't forgive the crime whether he gets nfa or not

2. I deserve more. I've started looking after myself, eating properly and doing some weekly exercise. It's amazing how doing this has improved my mood. I go out and brush my hair and put makeup on!!! My arthritis has improved dramatically by reducing carbs and losing some weight. Only a stone to go!!!

I have shaken off the problems associated with the knock by leaving him. I chose not to live like this anymore. Very empowering. I'm actually looking forward to the future and finding love with a man who deserves me!!

Bitterbean I hope that you can get your arthritis under control. It's so debilitating and I'm sorry that you are suffering. Try to set yourself small goals to achieve each week. Good luck, you can do this

Yes my health has got alot worst, 3 years ago I was healthy, walking loads and in a really good place.

Now I'm constantly having tests and my heart is not working properly , having alot of breathing problems. Not sure if this would of happened anyway, but the stress of the knock and all the fallout that follows sure played a big part in my health .

Anne

I feel your pain, my health has seriously dwindled in the last year, weight went down (3st) now going up again (1st) to be fair I could do with keeping it off but it does what it wants to do. Early onset osteoarthritis (I'm late 30s) has I swear gone to every joint possible. Feel pain all the time. Fear of going out obviously not helping with the above. Sleep seems to be getting a bit better at one point I wasn't sleeping more than 4 hours now I'm up to 6, always tired due to medication/ hypothyroidism/ insomnia/ lack of sleep not sure which is the bigger problem, couple all that lot with mixed anxiety depression disorder and ptsd I'm basically one foot in the grave lol.



Just wish everything can stabilise at some point where I don't feel like a walking zombie xx

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So very sorry to hear about all you lovely ladies and your struggles health-wise.

I'm an oldish mum (ie our person isn't a young lad) so we didn't experience the knock personally as it was at his home which is far from us. He's now living with us on his pre-charge bail. We are both in our 70's so expecting a few aches and pains to flare up, but since our person's arrest my husband looks so much older and I look very haggard until I slap on a bit of face stuff which helps a tiny bit hopefully.

I've suffered on and off all my adult life with IBS and also mouth ulcers, both linked to whenever I'm stressed. We're an ex teacher and ex police officer (and yes, he is very ashamed of his past profession at the moment because of the OIC's behaviour) and since retiring I've been very clear of any stress related problems. Not any more as the IBS is having a field day/week/month! As for my mouth, the ulcers have been joined by a lovely cousin of theirs called Lichen Planus which leaves sore patches randomly all over my mouth, throat and tongue. I try to be grateful as sometimes people get it in other areas of mucous membranes which shall remain nameless!!!!

Interestingly, despite not personally experiencing a knock, every time someone comes to our door my stomach lurches and I go hot and sweaty and make my husband answer it. Likewise whenever I see a police car near our house. If it affects me like this I can only feel so much sympathy for all you who have actually experienced it.

Bitterbean I am so sorry to hear about your health problems.

I really think that this whole nightmare situation directly affects the physical and mental health of partners and families and there is virtually no help or consideration given to this at all.

I have suffered from fibromyalgia for the past five years which was brought on by another very traumatic event in my life but it has become much worse since the knock and I'm now in constant pain.

I'm also very anxious and panic every time there's a knock on the door or if I see a police car even on the television and it has affected the way I feel about myself-I used to be a confident outgoing person who enjoyed a good social life and had lots of friends but now I'm very wary of talking to anyone and just want to hide myself away.

At times I do wonder if it is worth the constant struggle and think that I'm not living I'm just existing.

Excuse the negativity I'm not in a good place right now-today is the day that my son should have been graduating so that's triggered all kinds of emotions