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DevastatedWife

Member since
December 2022

40 posts

Posted Wed July 19, 2023 9:59amReport post

Post deleted by user


Edited Wed July 19, 2023 10:32am

DevastatedWife

Member since
December 2022

40 posts

Posted Wed July 19, 2023 11:33amReport post

Post deleted by user


Edited Sun January 14, 2024 3:37pm

DevastatedWife

Member since
December 2022

40 posts

Posted Wed July 19, 2023 11:33amReport post

Post deleted by user


Edited Wed July 19, 2023 11:34am

snowdrop

Member since
September 2019

178 posts

Posted Wed July 19, 2023 1:41pmReport post

Hi ..

I only occasionally reply on this forum now because my partners crime was dealt with over 6 years ago.

I just wanted to state that the threshold which CPS abide by re child abuse images is this .. Anyone found with one (1) class A image meets the custody threshold of one year imprisonment.

Now you will see that this process is not always carried out because it's down to the judge on the day, the numbers of image's, whether they are still or videos, what ages ...the time scale of viewing, sharing/distributing etc The judge will also look at mitigation...ie guilty plea, counciling, Lucy faithful participation, Stop it Now involvement.

The Government instructed the Courts in 2022 to change there handling of anyone communicating with anyone believing that person was a child, fantasy or not. Since this direction the courts policy is to believe that the Communication is with a real child...this has resulted in an increase in those committing this offence going to prison.

My partner had 5 images...2A, 2B, 1C. He was sentenced to 12 months imprisonment, suspended for 2 years.

Charges normally state All three counts/categories ie A,B,C and then the numbers found in each heading.

Best wishes ...

Edited Wed July 19, 2023 1:42pm

HelpMe

Member since
June 2022

140 posts

Posted Wed July 19, 2023 6:49pmReport post

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Edited Thu August 10, 2023 1:45pm

Parkerpoo1

Member since
July 2022

252 posts

Posted Wed July 19, 2023 10:40pmReport post

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Edited Thu December 21, 2023 10:08am

Losteverything

Member since
September 2022

216 posts

Posted Wed July 19, 2023 11:30pmReport post

From what you've said I would think that he will go to prison for a long time.
Get yourself and your child away from this and move on with your life.... you can do so much better x

Daffodil

Member since
March 2022

965 posts

Posted Thu July 20, 2023 5:59amReport post

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Edited Tue October 24, 2023 9:12am

Bluebell77

Member since
October 2020

89 posts

Posted Thu July 20, 2023 7:53amReport post

Hi,

Given everything you've stated I'd say he's looking at ot being a custodial & possibly years in prison rather than months. The pseudo images of his step daughters is massively concerning to me too.

The fact he is minimising everything will not go in his favour.

I hope you're ok, to go through this with a baby is awful. I was in the same situation although I have now left my husband due to him breaking his SHPO.

He's back In court tomorrow for sentancing.

I hope you're ok. Please focus on your little one as that's what's going to get you through this.

Feel free to message me, although between work & a toddler I don't get much free time but I will reply when I can.

Sending you lots of love. You're not alone in this, we are all here for you. Big hugs xxxxxx

JulieM

Member since
July 2023

76 posts

Posted Thu July 20, 2023 8:27amReport post

Dear Devastated,

I'm so sorry you and your little one have to go through this. TBH, I'm surprised SS have allowed him to still live with you and your baby, if he still is. The sheer volume of material your husband curated, along with his other actions he's been charged with seems pretty certain he will be given a custodial sentence. You need to concentrate on you and your baby and building a life without him. So many offenders seem to think because they didn't actually abuse a child, what they did wasn't as bad, but they repeatedly fail to accept that every video and photo is a child being abused, and their participation by viewing is fueling the market.

Please try to contact the helpline for advice. You definitely need support. You also need to start working out how you will approach the future without your husband. My heart goes out to you and your baby.

HelpMe

Member since
June 2022

140 posts

Posted Thu July 20, 2023 12:22pmReport post

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Edited Thu August 10, 2023 1:45pm

HelpMe

Member since
June 2022

140 posts

Posted Thu July 20, 2023 12:22pmReport post

Post deleted


Edited Thu August 10, 2023 1:45pm

HelpMe

Member since
June 2022

140 posts

Posted Thu July 20, 2023 12:23pmReport post

Post deleted


Edited Thu August 10, 2023 1:45pm

Bluebell77

Member since
October 2020

89 posts

Posted Thu July 20, 2023 3:38pmReport post

Devestated are you ok ? X

BaffledB

Member since
July 2021

876 posts

Posted Thu July 20, 2023 3:41pmReport post

Devastated,

I'm so sorry this has happened to you. Unfortunately, I have to agree with the others on the amount of charges, he will certainly have a large amount and he will likely get the book thrown at him. It must be extremely difficult and conflicting for him to be minimising his actions for you to process everything whilst trying to go about business as normal. I think you have made the right decision to separate and I am absolutely sure you will rebuild a new happy life for both you and your little one. I hope you have a good support network and you're looking after yourself. Big hugs xx

DevastatedWife

Member since
December 2022

40 posts

Posted Sat July 22, 2023 2:00pmReport post

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Edited Sun January 14, 2024 3:37pm

Nemesis

Member since
July 2021

125 posts

Posted Sat July 22, 2023 9:32pmReport post

If he is not accepting blame etc, my advice is to protect yourself and get organised.



You are married, so what does this entitle you to, would the house need to be sold, what about finances, what is your family support, is he well known in community? This may hit the media so what is the impact of that to you.



The police have told you more than many others receive so you may have longer ti plan and get organised.



Be kind to yourself x

Confused&worried

Member since
June 2022

326 posts

Posted Mon July 24, 2023 2:46pmReport post

Hi Devistated.

I hope you're as good as you can be. I just wanted to share what stood out to me from your story.

My husband is my eldest daughters step father, he is more of a dad to her than her biological father. Although none of his offences related to any of our children, what hurt me most outvof everything, is that I gave him the privilege of being MY daughters dad and I believe that he betrayed that privilege the moment he offended.

I have remained in my marriage but that is the area I struggle with most, had he actually involved her in his offending there is no way I could have stayed with him.