Triggers & Therapy
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Hi everyone,
I've been a lurker for the past 5 months as my person had the knock back in March. Your posts and replies have been a lifeline for me and I'm sure there must be so many more that just check the forums, the same way I do each day, without posting. I just wanted to take this opportunity to say thank you to all, especially the ones that continue to share their advice, even after their journey has ended - it is so appreciated.
I hope I am one day brave enough to share the full story but as you all know, this journey has been incredibly difficult. We're still in the limbo stage, some days are easier than others but there are days where all I feel is pure anger and grief of my old life before this. I look back at my 'worries in life' prior to this happening and would literally give an arm and a leg to relive those 'worries' again than go through this hell.
Regarding triggers, I find myself getting triggered by little things, hearing sirens will make me freeze on the spot, hearing the word 'police' or 'arrested' or 'court' sends shivers down my spine and make me sick to my stomach as they just alight flashbacks in my mind to the day it all happened.
I just wanted to ask if anyone else experiences these triggers and how to overcome them?
I know therapy is spoken about alot here and encouraged. I am not someone who finds it easy speaking about 'me' or my feelings. I don't know if therapy would be right for me since it depends on me talking. I am more of a 'if you ask me a question - I will give you an answer' kind of person, rather than a 'I can sit here and tell you everything start to finish in one go'.
Again, is there anyone else here who has felt the same about therapy but perhaps gone through with it? I would love to hear your experiences.
I've been a lurker for the past 5 months as my person had the knock back in March. Your posts and replies have been a lifeline for me and I'm sure there must be so many more that just check the forums, the same way I do each day, without posting. I just wanted to take this opportunity to say thank you to all, especially the ones that continue to share their advice, even after their journey has ended - it is so appreciated.
I hope I am one day brave enough to share the full story but as you all know, this journey has been incredibly difficult. We're still in the limbo stage, some days are easier than others but there are days where all I feel is pure anger and grief of my old life before this. I look back at my 'worries in life' prior to this happening and would literally give an arm and a leg to relive those 'worries' again than go through this hell.
Regarding triggers, I find myself getting triggered by little things, hearing sirens will make me freeze on the spot, hearing the word 'police' or 'arrested' or 'court' sends shivers down my spine and make me sick to my stomach as they just alight flashbacks in my mind to the day it all happened.
I just wanted to ask if anyone else experiences these triggers and how to overcome them?
I know therapy is spoken about alot here and encouraged. I am not someone who finds it easy speaking about 'me' or my feelings. I don't know if therapy would be right for me since it depends on me talking. I am more of a 'if you ask me a question - I will give you an answer' kind of person, rather than a 'I can sit here and tell you everything start to finish in one go'.
Again, is there anyone else here who has felt the same about therapy but perhaps gone through with it? I would love to hear your experiences.
There are lots of self help guides available these days.
https://www.nhsinform.scot/illnesses-and-conditions/mental-health/mental-health-self-help-guides/ptsd-and-cptsd-self-help-guide
NHS therapy tends to have long waiting times and going privately is expensive. I found that the best support came from the charity MIND. They were able to get me counselling within 48 hrs and it was free.
https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/local-minds/
https://www.nhsinform.scot/illnesses-and-conditions/mental-health/mental-health-self-help-guides/ptsd-and-cptsd-self-help-guide
NHS therapy tends to have long waiting times and going privately is expensive. I found that the best support came from the charity MIND. They were able to get me counselling within 48 hrs and it was free.
https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/local-minds/
Crystal Tears you are certainly not alone in being triggered by sounds and words in this SITUATION. I was and still am, but the intensity of the feelings has lessened over time. I have had counselling, but nort specifically for this. Good advice her from Edel and Lee on therapy.
I I just wanted to let you know that your reaction appears to be a very normal one to these circumstances, and if you do a search on this forum for triggers you will see how common it is.
I I just wanted to let you know that your reaction appears to be a very normal one to these circumstances, and if you do a search on this forum for triggers you will see how common it is.
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Hi,
im very much like that with therapy Im not very good at talking about my feelings and it makes me feel uncomfortable, my partners parents offered to pay for me to have therapy which was kind of them but I turned down. After a few months I rang my doctor who prescribed me antidepressants, but it actually took me months to actually take them as I felt a failure which I know is stupid.
I get the triggers as well, I can be totally fine then anything can trigger me and I just feel anger, anxiety, scared.... even a few weeks ago I was taking my daughter to her dance class and we witnessed a guy being arrested and vigilantes there for attempting to meet a child. Few weeks later it was in the local news which just triggered so much anxiety.
im very much like that with therapy Im not very good at talking about my feelings and it makes me feel uncomfortable, my partners parents offered to pay for me to have therapy which was kind of them but I turned down. After a few months I rang my doctor who prescribed me antidepressants, but it actually took me months to actually take them as I felt a failure which I know is stupid.
I get the triggers as well, I can be totally fine then anything can trigger me and I just feel anger, anxiety, scared.... even a few weeks ago I was taking my daughter to her dance class and we witnessed a guy being arrested and vigilantes there for attempting to meet a child. Few weeks later it was in the local news which just triggered so much anxiety.
Crystal Tears, in a way you are getting a form of therapy right here by taking part (yes, even 'lurking'!). I was in therapy for over a year because of what happened, but I find being in the virtual company of others walking a similar path hugely comforting and therapeutic. My therapist is fantastic, but she honestly hasn't a clue about the huge, convoluted mix of emotions I'm battling every minute. She can read about it in books, but she's not a survivor like we are. Maybe one day you might feel like you want to talk about what you're going through, but in the meantime just walk your walk and know that we're here travelling our own journeys beside you.
Hi everyone,
Thank you so much for all of your replies and advice. I will definitely check out everything mentioned.
I just feel like I need a holiday away from here. But then the thought of being on holiday and this being in the back of my mind, plus not to mention the fact that THIS is what I'd be coming back to just puts me right off.
Hope you all have a great weekend x
Thank you so much for all of your replies and advice. I will definitely check out everything mentioned.
I just feel like I need a holiday away from here. But then the thought of being on holiday and this being in the back of my mind, plus not to mention the fact that THIS is what I'd be coming back to just puts me right off.
Hope you all have a great weekend x
Crystal - we had a holiday booked (in the Carribean so hugely anticipated!) a few weeks after our son's arrest and coming to live with us. All massively stressful and I just didn't want to go on holiday any more. But our daughter encouraged us to go, promised to keep an eye on our son (I was terrified he'd take his life without us there to watch over him) and we decided that being in a mess surrounded by blue skies and palm trees was a better option than the same mess sitting at home.
So we went and yes, it was on our minds still but it really did us good to get away and mix with strangers who knew nothing about us so no awkward questioning and we returned to the same stressful situation but having cleared our minds a little and feeling more on top of everything. So I'd say, do go on holiday. It will be different from a 'normal' time away but it will have some good moments and will remind you that there is a big beautiful world out there which you WILL return to one day xx
So we went and yes, it was on our minds still but it really did us good to get away and mix with strangers who knew nothing about us so no awkward questioning and we returned to the same stressful situation but having cleared our minds a little and feeling more on top of everything. So I'd say, do go on holiday. It will be different from a 'normal' time away but it will have some good moments and will remind you that there is a big beautiful world out there which you WILL return to one day xx