Safety Plan - Children's Services
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So, I just need some advice.
Background:
The knock was 6th January 2021. We has a 18 month old son at the time. We went up contry to my family for a month and then came home.
He was allowed to come back and live here, but only with supervised contact, and long story short we have since had another son.
The police have finally finalised scanning his devices, and given him a summary of what they're going forward with charging. This is an entirely different set of charges than what SS are accusing him of. They turned up unanounced and demanded he move out, and he can only see them in public now. The police have said that they will only be limiting his online activity and have little convern for our children.
I now have a Initial Child Protection Conference on Tuesday. They are wanting a LFF assessment done, which im all for but have been dragging their feet over having it done. We agreed to it over six months ago.
I had just gotten my son to a place where he didnt cry everytime his dad left the house and now they have ripped him away again. It is really affecting my son's mental health who now expresses that he "doesn't like going home now" (because his dad has gone, they were very very close). He's angry, lashing out, he's even burst my nose. He's having nightmares. They've basically destroyed my happy, funny, loving little boy.
My questions are basically these: Are they allowed to just make up what his dad actually did wrong? Are they allowed to just completely disregard his mental health, and the impact this is having on our son? I'm now left with no support, an angry three year old and a two month old, and im ripped in so many directions. Am i allowed to not agree to him having to move out, or are they likely to take my children from me?
Also, I want to make it clear that im absolutely all for having these LFF assessments done. It's the fact we've been waiting six monnths and theyve still not been done with no explanation and all they keep saying is "we'll see what the assessment says".
I really hate these people.
Background:
The knock was 6th January 2021. We has a 18 month old son at the time. We went up contry to my family for a month and then came home.
He was allowed to come back and live here, but only with supervised contact, and long story short we have since had another son.
The police have finally finalised scanning his devices, and given him a summary of what they're going forward with charging. This is an entirely different set of charges than what SS are accusing him of. They turned up unanounced and demanded he move out, and he can only see them in public now. The police have said that they will only be limiting his online activity and have little convern for our children.
I now have a Initial Child Protection Conference on Tuesday. They are wanting a LFF assessment done, which im all for but have been dragging their feet over having it done. We agreed to it over six months ago.
I had just gotten my son to a place where he didnt cry everytime his dad left the house and now they have ripped him away again. It is really affecting my son's mental health who now expresses that he "doesn't like going home now" (because his dad has gone, they were very very close). He's angry, lashing out, he's even burst my nose. He's having nightmares. They've basically destroyed my happy, funny, loving little boy.
My questions are basically these: Are they allowed to just make up what his dad actually did wrong? Are they allowed to just completely disregard his mental health, and the impact this is having on our son? I'm now left with no support, an angry three year old and a two month old, and im ripped in so many directions. Am i allowed to not agree to him having to move out, or are they likely to take my children from me?
Also, I want to make it clear that im absolutely all for having these LFF assessments done. It's the fact we've been waiting six monnths and theyve still not been done with no explanation and all they keep saying is "we'll see what the assessment says".
I really hate these people.
First of all, I'm so sorry for all this stress for you all and sending you a hug.
I would really recommend that you make contact with the Family Rights group helpline https://frg.org.uk/ although there isn't much time before your CP initial conference but definitely afterwards when you know what's what.
Do you have any family members or friends coming to the conference? Did you know that was allowed? If they live too far away you could request they join via zoom. It's such an emotional time for you and having someone there to speak up for you could be helpful. Children's Services always have to consider that the best place for a child is in the home with their parents so you have a strong starting place. The main problem is that they also use a 'balance of probability' in their thinking rather than the police who go on evidence, so it does depend on the SW involved and their own judgments, although it shouldn't. Has the Chair of the meeting contacted you? Their job is to ensure that things are done fairly and in the child's best interests so yours should be very concerned about your child's mental health.
Apologies if you know all this already - and here is another hug! Do let us know how tomorrow goes. Many of us will be thinking of you xx
I would really recommend that you make contact with the Family Rights group helpline https://frg.org.uk/ although there isn't much time before your CP initial conference but definitely afterwards when you know what's what.
Do you have any family members or friends coming to the conference? Did you know that was allowed? If they live too far away you could request they join via zoom. It's such an emotional time for you and having someone there to speak up for you could be helpful. Children's Services always have to consider that the best place for a child is in the home with their parents so you have a strong starting place. The main problem is that they also use a 'balance of probability' in their thinking rather than the police who go on evidence, so it does depend on the SW involved and their own judgments, although it shouldn't. Has the Chair of the meeting contacted you? Their job is to ensure that things are done fairly and in the child's best interests so yours should be very concerned about your child's mental health.
Apologies if you know all this already - and here is another hug! Do let us know how tomorrow goes. Many of us will be thinking of you xx
Lee - what exactly is a risk assessment? Is it for the offender (so not possible until charging I guess?) or for those supervising contact to see if they understand the risk involved?