What are the chances of it being a mistake?
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I know I'm most likely going to get the answer I don't want but, in all honesty has anyone gone through this experience and turns out to be a virus, malware or anything else? I know I sound naive, but it's the only speck of hope I can really cling onto.
My OH is adament he hasn't done anything, he's even broken down into floods tears in front of my mum saying to her that he's innocent and hasn't done it. I just want to add while I know it doesn't happen to everyone but when he went to pieces my OH had been drinking, in fact they've been drinking very heavily since we had to live apart, and the saying "drunk words are sober thoughts" came to mind. He's not manipulative or tec savvy at all, and I'm certain with what I've been told has been found can't be found with just a quick google search.
Not only that but the police just won't give any info, all I know is that a lot of images have been found from all different catagories. In the meetings I've had with SS and every other proffessionals the police say they have to search through thousands of pictures but quickly say that doesnt mean they have thousands of illegal images but just what they're processing. I've asked the question before where exactly have they found said images like his phone gallery, hidden files or whatever and they wont give me any information, not even which device it's all been found on but I'm just assuming his phone.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not in denial, I can only hope that he isn't lying to me but the seed of doubt has very much been planted. I'd rather him be honest if he had downloaded such pictures, but he's adament he hasn't and there's days where I've seen him completely broken by it all. Every single proffessional (not police) has told me that it's not a mistake, that he is completely guilty but with him not being tec savvy I just don't know how.
This has been going on for months and we never have any updates from the police other than they keep extending his bail date, without any notice... & without any explination why.
Like I said, I know I'm most likely going to get an answer that won't be good but I'm just genuinely curious if it could potientially be a mistake dispite what the proffessionals say? TIA xx
My OH is adament he hasn't done anything, he's even broken down into floods tears in front of my mum saying to her that he's innocent and hasn't done it. I just want to add while I know it doesn't happen to everyone but when he went to pieces my OH had been drinking, in fact they've been drinking very heavily since we had to live apart, and the saying "drunk words are sober thoughts" came to mind. He's not manipulative or tec savvy at all, and I'm certain with what I've been told has been found can't be found with just a quick google search.
Not only that but the police just won't give any info, all I know is that a lot of images have been found from all different catagories. In the meetings I've had with SS and every other proffessionals the police say they have to search through thousands of pictures but quickly say that doesnt mean they have thousands of illegal images but just what they're processing. I've asked the question before where exactly have they found said images like his phone gallery, hidden files or whatever and they wont give me any information, not even which device it's all been found on but I'm just assuming his phone.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not in denial, I can only hope that he isn't lying to me but the seed of doubt has very much been planted. I'd rather him be honest if he had downloaded such pictures, but he's adament he hasn't and there's days where I've seen him completely broken by it all. Every single proffessional (not police) has told me that it's not a mistake, that he is completely guilty but with him not being tec savvy I just don't know how.
This has been going on for months and we never have any updates from the police other than they keep extending his bail date, without any notice... & without any explination why.
Like I said, I know I'm most likely going to get an answer that won't be good but I'm just genuinely curious if it could potientially be a mistake dispite what the proffessionals say? TIA xx
Hi - not really a lot to offer except a hug of support.
it really is a horrible journey and I pry your thoughts on innocence is the reality. But secret lives unfortunately DO happen. We had absolutely no inclination what was going on under our noses and the secret life our son was leading (he lived with us). It was a severe shock I can tell you and even years down the line I still find it hard to believe.
saying this please don't think I'm saying or suggesting your OH 'is' guilty.
Im sure the other ladies on here will be generous with advice but I just want to note I'm here for you xxxxxx
it really is a horrible journey and I pry your thoughts on innocence is the reality. But secret lives unfortunately DO happen. We had absolutely no inclination what was going on under our noses and the secret life our son was leading (he lived with us). It was a severe shock I can tell you and even years down the line I still find it hard to believe.
saying this please don't think I'm saying or suggesting your OH 'is' guilty.
Im sure the other ladies on here will be generous with advice but I just want to note I'm here for you xxxxxx
It's certainly possible to click on a link that somebody has sent you in an app, for example and then to download something that you didn't necessarily want. The link won't always tell you what the content is and the less tec savvy you are, the more likely you are to click on something like that.
But these links don't just appear out of the blue. It's usually when the person is searching for adult porn, that they come across those things and they think it will be a link to more adult porn.
So instead of asking your OH what he hasn't done, maybe ask him what he has been doing instead. Is he a porn addict, what apps does he use, did he accidentally click on something he shouldn't have clicked?
But these links don't just appear out of the blue. It's usually when the person is searching for adult porn, that they come across those things and they think it will be a link to more adult porn.
So instead of asking your OH what he hasn't done, maybe ask him what he has been doing instead. Is he a porn addict, what apps does he use, did he accidentally click on something he shouldn't have clicked?