How can I protect my kids from this?
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Hi All, although I have made a couple of replies on here I have not shared my story.
OH will go to jury, as soon as a couple of weeks time - he is pleading not guilty to online communication. And although I believe him and understand the situation, I am well aware he may be found guilty. His plea hearing was in online local media which was bad enough, but I know it will definitely be in the media if found guilty, could go national. I know that what actually happened will be massively distorted by the media too.
My kids have just gone back to school, the eldest is starting secondary. I don't know how to protect them from other people's opinions and I am frightened this will reflect on them, or they will be bullied. The thought of people / kids gossiping about them behind they're backs makes me feel sick.
Please could anyone with children please give me some hope that it will be alright, or how you dealt with it. I don't want to move areas as the kids are settled with lovely friends, and i wouldn't know where to go (but running away seems the obvious answer). Anyway, moving would probably take a year.
Thank you for listening x
OH will go to jury, as soon as a couple of weeks time - he is pleading not guilty to online communication. And although I believe him and understand the situation, I am well aware he may be found guilty. His plea hearing was in online local media which was bad enough, but I know it will definitely be in the media if found guilty, could go national. I know that what actually happened will be massively distorted by the media too.
My kids have just gone back to school, the eldest is starting secondary. I don't know how to protect them from other people's opinions and I am frightened this will reflect on them, or they will be bullied. The thought of people / kids gossiping about them behind they're backs makes me feel sick.
Please could anyone with children please give me some hope that it will be alright, or how you dealt with it. I don't want to move areas as the kids are settled with lovely friends, and i wouldn't know where to go (but running away seems the obvious answer). Anyway, moving would probably take a year.
Thank you for listening x
Hi. Although i can't give you advice as we haven't got that far with our journey in all this chaos, I just wanted to send you some love. + I hope you are looking after yourself amongst all of this.
I hope things go as okay as they possibly can. x
I hope things go as okay as they possibly can. x
Hi,
I'm not that far yet on this journey but also have the same fears for my daughters. When I do get to the stage of court I'm going to write a letter to the judge to ask our address his photo not to be released to protect our children.
my youngest daughter has autism and anxiety, she's slept in my bed for over a year now since the knock. She doesn't sleep unless I'm in bed, she feels sick every day with worries. I'm going to see if our gp would maybe write a letter to see if that could also help.
I wish the police/courts/media would take more into consideration on how this being made public can have massive affects on children.
I'm not that far yet on this journey but also have the same fears for my daughters. When I do get to the stage of court I'm going to write a letter to the judge to ask our address his photo not to be released to protect our children.
my youngest daughter has autism and anxiety, she's slept in my bed for over a year now since the knock. She doesn't sleep unless I'm in bed, she feels sick every day with worries. I'm going to see if our gp would maybe write a letter to see if that could also help.
I wish the police/courts/media would take more into consideration on how this being made public can have massive affects on children.
Thanks A and confused.
I feel so much more should be done to protect the children, which is surely what everyone wants for all chikdren, but no-one seems to care enough to do anything about it.
I had to point out to the social worker that my children are the only actual real life children involved as it was a decoy. She just looked dumbstruck, as if she'd never thought of it like that!! Surely, these are the children she should be putting first and make sure they are protected from all adverse experiences, and not just from the perceived danger from their father. Actually I don't think she has considered the situation at all or thought about the actual risk he may present.
Px
I feel so much more should be done to protect the children, which is surely what everyone wants for all chikdren, but no-one seems to care enough to do anything about it.
I had to point out to the social worker that my children are the only actual real life children involved as it was a decoy. She just looked dumbstruck, as if she'd never thought of it like that!! Surely, these are the children she should be putting first and make sure they are protected from all adverse experiences, and not just from the perceived danger from their father. Actually I don't think she has considered the situation at all or thought about the actual risk he may present.
Px
My kids are teens and our case was in the paper after sentencing. It was, as you would expect from the media, sensationalised, family man's fall from grace type thing. The kids have never had any issues. I told the school so they were aware (they were aware of his arrest anyway from MASH) and they kept a eye out for any bullying or trouble but nothing. We're no longer together which may help, but I've had nothing but support from people. I'd told some friends anyway and they've been life savers. People do judge him, and avoid him, and he'll move away when the kids leave school, but we've also had some friends who understand. (It was also communication with minors (decoys) and he pleaded guilty to avoid going to trial.)
I think as mums we worry about our children being excluded or picked on which I guess can happen. Kids can be mean sometimes and I didn't want my child to be judged because of their dads actions. But my experience so far is that my childs friends have been great, they are teens so know about the situation but they have really surprised me. I think they can be more mature than we think and my childs friend group obviously see them and not thir dads crime. Adults are worse to deal with imo.
Thanks for the reassurances, adults are probably worse than kids!