Devastated
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Hi all
I too had the dreaded knock two weeks ago we were just packing to go on our holiday there was 8 plain clothes police officers at the door all I heard was images which made me feel physically sick ,I just thought this can’t be possible we have been married for 17 years and my husband is the nicest kind person I know I was beaten bet badly by my previous husband and was always living in and out of women’s refugee so when I met my husband I felt on top of the world then 5 years into the marriage after lots of digging deep I found out he was having an affair my world was shattered he was in denial but all the evidence was there it has taken 8 year of very hard work to get to where we are today we are closer than ever and very strong and now this . He has been suspended from his job under investigation they took my laptop ? Hasn’t been turned on in years and he doesn’t know the password and his mobile phone I’m devastated I really don’t know what to do he has opened up and said he accidently open some pics up one day but clicked straight off and has never looked at anything since I told him how do you expect me to believe you as you lied about the affair he said I have nothing to loose now I’ve told you the truth he said this was 3 years ago but the solicitor said it would be something recent he’s been on has anyone else been told it’s always something recent
thanks broken hearted
I too had the dreaded knock two weeks ago we were just packing to go on our holiday there was 8 plain clothes police officers at the door all I heard was images which made me feel physically sick ,I just thought this can’t be possible we have been married for 17 years and my husband is the nicest kind person I know I was beaten bet badly by my previous husband and was always living in and out of women’s refugee so when I met my husband I felt on top of the world then 5 years into the marriage after lots of digging deep I found out he was having an affair my world was shattered he was in denial but all the evidence was there it has taken 8 year of very hard work to get to where we are today we are closer than ever and very strong and now this . He has been suspended from his job under investigation they took my laptop ? Hasn’t been turned on in years and he doesn’t know the password and his mobile phone I’m devastated I really don’t know what to do he has opened up and said he accidently open some pics up one day but clicked straight off and has never looked at anything since I told him how do you expect me to believe you as you lied about the affair he said I have nothing to loose now I’ve told you the truth he said this was 3 years ago but the solicitor said it would be something recent he’s been on has anyone else been told it’s always something recent
thanks broken hearted
Thankyou so much for your reply I’m sat in tears I’m just so confused and hurt and angry I have been through so much right back to when I was a child my mother beat me then my ex husband I have had a life from hell and feel I have only been put here to suffer I love my husband so much I just don’t know what to do I’m at rock bottom I just don’t know where to turn my mind goes over and over thinking he said it was years ago why would the police come now surely it has to be recent I’m beside myself and if this takes 6-12 months it’s going to be a long road xx
Hi cocktailqueen
So sorry that you have joined this horrendous club we are all in. It sounds like you have had a really difficult life so far. My heart goes out to you. We all feel the same emotions on here and although we are all strong, sometimes you are just tired of being strong and want a normal life.
I'm about 7 weeks post knock and have never felt so confused in all my life. I love my husband but hate how he has destroyed our families life as we know it. I just don't know if we can ever get it back. I hear stories of how couples have come out stronger and closer than ever before and I just hope I can be one of those. And for everyone else on here to as well if they decide to stay with their partners.
All you can do is one day at a time and don't make any hasty decisions. Just try and keep talking to your partner, but watch out for lies. My husband is at this point because of a porn addiction and he was very good at lying. I expect nothing but the truth 100% even if it hurts. If I don't get it I will be walking.
Please just look after yourself and keep checking in on here. Everyone understands and we all help each other through bad days. Xx
So sorry that you have joined this horrendous club we are all in. It sounds like you have had a really difficult life so far. My heart goes out to you. We all feel the same emotions on here and although we are all strong, sometimes you are just tired of being strong and want a normal life.
I'm about 7 weeks post knock and have never felt so confused in all my life. I love my husband but hate how he has destroyed our families life as we know it. I just don't know if we can ever get it back. I hear stories of how couples have come out stronger and closer than ever before and I just hope I can be one of those. And for everyone else on here to as well if they decide to stay with their partners.
All you can do is one day at a time and don't make any hasty decisions. Just try and keep talking to your partner, but watch out for lies. My husband is at this point because of a porn addiction and he was very good at lying. I expect nothing but the truth 100% even if it hurts. If I don't get it I will be walking.
Please just look after yourself and keep checking in on here. Everyone understands and we all help each other through bad days. Xx
Thankyou all my emotions are all over I do t know what to do I feel like just running a thousand miles away and never coming back I deeply love this man so much but I can’t go in being hurt I just hate the waiting game and it’s only just begun I can’t tell anyone and no one to talk to everyone knows something is wrong with me as I keep breaking down some days I feel like ending it all I really am struggling the internet is an evil place what happened to simple days happy days when we were kids I hate this world now why do we have to suffer all this pain
Hi cocktailqueen
Unfortunately what you're feeling is completely normal. All the different emotions, anger, shock, love, disbelief, I could go on! Your mind will flit from one thing to another and one minute you will want to be with your husband the next you won't!
Please go and see your GP if you haven't already, just to talk to them and get yourself in their horizon. You are obviously a strong lady but please make sure you are looked after first and foremost. Ring the helpline, they are great and will really be able to help you.
I don't know the in's and outs but I'd be surprised if this was that old with no recent stuff. The waiting is the worst thing because your imagination is your enemy but it does get easier as time goes by.
Keep coming on here, you will only find non-judgemental support and help
Take care xx
Unfortunately what you're feeling is completely normal. All the different emotions, anger, shock, love, disbelief, I could go on! Your mind will flit from one thing to another and one minute you will want to be with your husband the next you won't!
Please go and see your GP if you haven't already, just to talk to them and get yourself in their horizon. You are obviously a strong lady but please make sure you are looked after first and foremost. Ring the helpline, they are great and will really be able to help you.
I don't know the in's and outs but I'd be surprised if this was that old with no recent stuff. The waiting is the worst thing because your imagination is your enemy but it does get easier as time goes by.
Keep coming on here, you will only find non-judgemental support and help
Take care xx