Lack of family support
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Hi. I am having a bad week. First court hearing was on Wed and I have been on tenderhooks all week about it getting out. What has suddenly hit me though is that my mum and siblings are really distant. Bit by bit I am feeling the support falter. Not even a phone call or text from my mum! I find that one of the most upsetting things of all. I think my mum feels upset with me somehow or doesnt want to be associated with the shame. Or maybe they are sick of me being miserable. I feel no support from them and cried all afternoon today about it. Thank god I have amazing friends and a counsellor. But I cannot imagine being so unsupportive to my son if he has difficult times in the future. It just dumbfounds me! I don't know whether to bring it up with them or just accept that this is another casualty of my ex husband's behaviour
Hi Anxious, I'm sorry you're having a bad week. My advice to you is to talk to your mum and tell her how you feel in a non reactive way. You'll never know what's in her head and what her thoughts are on the situation until you do. It's so easy to imagine scenarios and tell ourselves stories about what another person is feeling or thinking and quite often we're so wrong. But you have to give her a chance to explain and then if you're right you're very entitled to feel upset and hurt, but there's every chance that there's a reasonable explanation for her behaviour. I hope things start to look up for you xx
It's so hard - our deepest emotions are always hard to talk about even with those we love....
I have found where everyone was supportive and helping me at the beginning they have now gone back to their lives and left me behind. It is hard when your family are not suporting you as you feel they should. A friend told me that perhaps they are struggling as well and do not want to burden you. Do you think this is what happening? You say that you are miserable all the time, do you think that they do not know what to say so keep their distance as it is easier? Or do you put up a facade of being alright so they think you do not need the support. I am only trying to think of things that may explain their reaction
As you know my sons crime was within our family. I can see they are hurting too but there's things that have to remain unsaid due to an ultimatum.
Everyone does suffer in their own way there's no doubt about that. :-(
Everyone does suffer in their own way there's no doubt about that. :-(