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I haven't really posted much , just over a year from the knock ...devices still not checked ....husband no longer living with us ....I'm feeling quite lost at the moment, since he admitted viewing iioc he's not been home ( my request ), I've only spoken to him twice , both times he has sobbed and threatened to kill himself , we have seven wonderful children , aged 16 to 30 , and 5 grandchildren....3 of the boys have contact with him via text , he continues to express he will end his life at Christmas, he's had counselling and completed the lff course ....I don't know what to say or do ...I tried counselling through work but didn't really help ...I dint think anyone can offer help unless they've experienced something similar ...it's everything, the shock , financially struggling ( he lost his job ), the biggest pain is seeing my children dealing with something they should never have too and we haven't got to the court case yet ...sorry long rambling message , I don't know what I'm looking for , I guess I just feel very alone
Hi Sarahe
I totally understand how you feel. People can empathise but until they've walked in our shoes they can only imagine how we feel. It's the uncertainty of the situation which I find hard not just the dealing with what our OH's have done.
Just know you're not alone.
Sending hugs
I totally understand how you feel. People can empathise but until they've walked in our shoes they can only imagine how we feel. It's the uncertainty of the situation which I find hard not just the dealing with what our OH's have done.
Just know you're not alone.
Sending hugs
Hi,
I'm so sorry that you're going through this. It's incredibly cruel of your OH to express his thoughts of suicide to yourself and your children, particularly when mentioning that he will do it around Christmas. This very much seems like a kind of emotional blackmail as he doesn't want to be alone over the Christmas period. Apologies if that seems harsh but generally people who are experiencing these thoughts don't express it in this way.
You and your OH can request to access counselling through Circles, they offer up to 30 hours free and specialise in this area.
You are only responsible for your own actions, that's important to remember when faced with this situation. I've supported a family member through self harm and a suicide attempt and maintaining boundaries helped us both massively. He is responsible for healing himself, you can signpost if you wish to but ultimately it has to come from him.
Do whatever feels right for you and keep those boundaries in place. Sending love and strength xxx
I'm so sorry that you're going through this. It's incredibly cruel of your OH to express his thoughts of suicide to yourself and your children, particularly when mentioning that he will do it around Christmas. This very much seems like a kind of emotional blackmail as he doesn't want to be alone over the Christmas period. Apologies if that seems harsh but generally people who are experiencing these thoughts don't express it in this way.
You and your OH can request to access counselling through Circles, they offer up to 30 hours free and specialise in this area.
You are only responsible for your own actions, that's important to remember when faced with this situation. I've supported a family member through self harm and a suicide attempt and maintaining boundaries helped us both massively. He is responsible for healing himself, you can signpost if you wish to but ultimately it has to come from him.
Do whatever feels right for you and keep those boundaries in place. Sending love and strength xxx