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Will we find out the truth at court?

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Ladyjane

Member since
November 2023

16 posts

Posted Tue November 28, 2023 5:05pmReport post

Family member has told us he has been charged with talking to someone underage online. It was an undercover police officer. He is being very vague about what happened, saying the police lured him in, he didn't think he said anything too bad, he can't remember what he said.

It's very hard as a family to know how to feel without knowing what he said/did. I am of the opinion that once someone says they are '13' you end the conversation. I also fully believe that he must have continued talking sexually.

Others in the family are saying he was clearly lured in and he hasn't really done anything wrong.

If someone goes to court with him for sentencing will they hear the truth about what he has done? Or will court just say 'talking to underage people online' ?

He has pleaded guilty and is getting sentenced later this week. His PO has told him it's most likely to be a non custodial sentence.

I am getting more angry and upset everyday (found out yesterday) - is this normal? I feel lonely that I can't discuss with anyone.

K4

Member since
October 2022

611 posts

Posted Tue November 28, 2023 5:17pmReport post

Sorry that you're in this place, it is very lonely.

i don't know what will be found out at court, but there are lots of threads on here regarding decoys. It seems to be very common.



It is normal to be angry, but if you want to understand more the LFF course for family and friends is helpful.



Take care and know that 1000 men a month are picked up by the police for online offences, the vast majority are not contact offenders and the rates of recidivism are really low.



x

Ladyjane

Member since
November 2023

16 posts

Posted Tue November 28, 2023 6:02pmReport post

Do you think the police encourage and drag people into sexual talk? I understand that this is still a crime.

Does it matter who starts sexual talk first?



My family member is on the autistic spectrum and has never had any female attention. We can see how, if someone gave him sexual attention, it would be so novel he wouldn't be thinking straight.



I'm still absolutely furious with him tho.

Ocean

Member since
September 2023

766 posts

Posted Tue November 28, 2023 9:37pmReport post

You will hear the prosecutions side of the offence and the charges in court. In my persons case the prosecution read out some details that were untrue but as my person had decided to plead guilty these were not challenged. Therefore I would advise you to take what you hear as the worst possible scenario. It may be an exaggerated version of the truth.

Ladyjane

Member since
November 2023

16 posts

Posted Wed November 29, 2023 4:57pmReport post

How do you know what the police said was untrue?

Also if someone pleads guilty would we hear more detail in court or will they just read out the crime?

edel2020

Member since
March 2022

373 posts

Posted Thu November 30, 2023 10:21amReport post

It's unlikely that the full transcript of the chat will be read out in court, unless he pleads not guilty and it goes to trial.

The best way to find out what was said is to ask the person to grant you full disclosure, which means their solicitors can share all the evidence with you.

Ocean

Member since
September 2023

766 posts

Posted Thu November 30, 2023 4:23pmReport post

We knew that there were some untruths and exaggeration in what the prosecution said as the information in the statements said differently.