Does the guilt ever go away.....
Notifications OFF
I have not done anything but it always feels like I'm the one in wrong for wanting my kids dad involved in my kids lives ( when we have a answer from the ss of them doing a assessment for when/if supervision vists with him and them ever happen.... but not sure if this was shared with the ppl whom knowing this situation agree with me on my kids and him.... I'd never let anything happen to them as assured he would never do it again but I feel guilty for wanting it as much as my kids do I don't forgive him in what his done..... but his thier dad...... honestly I'm just unsure of how I should be honestly I'm lost
( he had cat a images 150+ he said and now on a suspension of 2yo this his got community work to 200hrs and on registration.......)
( he had cat a images 150+ he said and now on a suspension of 2yo this his got community work to 200hrs and on registration.......)
I think yes he should be in their lives esp if he has worked on himself to understand how he got to the place he did in the first place.
He is still their dad.
He did wrong, he has his sentence but it is not a life sentence.
For me, very few people know what has happened but I has intense shame around all the professionals in the schools involved my children's child in need meetings. However now 6 months in I feel I am getting over it..... and I got through the last meeting with out tears but I def still feel judged by the secondary school rep for my daughter. The primary head for my son is AMAZING and so kind.
I see a stopso counsellor once a month and that really helps to be in a safe place where there is no shame. I also feel the LFF Inform course helped.
So yes you can, just takes time and the world moves on.....
He is still their dad.
He did wrong, he has his sentence but it is not a life sentence.
For me, very few people know what has happened but I has intense shame around all the professionals in the schools involved my children's child in need meetings. However now 6 months in I feel I am getting over it..... and I got through the last meeting with out tears but I def still feel judged by the secondary school rep for my daughter. The primary head for my son is AMAZING and so kind.
I see a stopso counsellor once a month and that really helps to be in a safe place where there is no shame. I also feel the LFF Inform course helped.
So yes you can, just takes time and the world moves on.....
I'm seeing what you are saying about I'm just unsure of moving on until the ss are officially out of my life and kids but I can't see that happening regarding his situation with me I'm over what he did but as a mom I can't take the serious responsibility of a mom 1st and I am almost certain that I'm in 2 parts in regards of my life was turned upside down as much as them it's bien so far no support from ppl because them that know about him it's just not accepted for them to be as forgiving...... my kids are always going to get a opportunity for seeing him but it's always there choice not his or mine..... I wish he cheated on me with a woman it be easier for me to forgive him..... but I'm so far awaiting talk therapy but nothing else suggested by anyone so if u can spare time to let me know where to start happy to wait ...
Hi Whisper, you may well have SS in your life for quite sometime so my suggestion would be to work with them in finding a way that your children and their Dad can maintain contact.
I can see that you are waiting for Talking therapies. Have you also contacted LFF about the Informed Plus course that they offer. I haven't personally done it but it is often recommended on here. There is also a charity called Talking forward which you can find on Google. They offer online peer support group sessions which are held several times a month. I don't know what your financial situation is like but if you can afford it, then private psychotherapy is another option.
I'm not sure if this gives you the information you are asking for but if not please ask again and if I can't help there will probably be someone who can.
I can see that you are waiting for Talking therapies. Have you also contacted LFF about the Informed Plus course that they offer. I haven't personally done it but it is often recommended on here. There is also a charity called Talking forward which you can find on Google. They offer online peer support group sessions which are held several times a month. I don't know what your financial situation is like but if you can afford it, then private psychotherapy is another option.
I'm not sure if this gives you the information you are asking for but if not please ask again and if I can't help there will probably be someone who can.