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First Family Event

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Mantis

Member since
January 2024

16 posts

Posted Sat January 13, 2024 8:58amReport post

Since the knock on the 11/01/2024. We now have our first family event. It's a 30th birthday meal with 10 of us at a busy resturant. There will be one child there who is 4 years old. Would this be breaking bail if the my person comes to this event. I was trying to work out what difference is it to me and them being in a resturant full of people and children... where as because he knows this one and they would be at the table... is that not allowed?

Distressed and pregnant

Member since
November 2020

1001 posts

Posted Sat January 13, 2024 9:22amReport post

Hi,

what are his bail conditions? If you're not sure whether he would be breaking them and aren't ready to tell people it might be best if he sits this one out xxx

Dutch2024

Member since
January 2024

17 posts

Posted Sat January 13, 2024 9:28amReport post

Hi, it does depend on his bail conditions. Read them again and if in any doubt ask your Police contact/solicitor for advice.

It is important to be clear.

Other than that you go and have some time out with your family. Easy to make an excuse why your person is not there.

Xx

Edited Sat January 13, 2024 9:28am

rainyday52

Member since
April 2023

447 posts

Posted Sat January 13, 2024 9:36amReport post

If his bail states that he has to be supervised with under 18's which is how it's often worded, then he probably isn't breaking his bail by attending with you there.

However, with our son we've taken the stance that we would hate to be at a family event with children without their parents knowing about the situation as if/when they find out in the future they could feel they'd put their children at risk without having any knowledge of that risk. But as we certainly don't want to tell people about the situation, the only conclusion is for our son not to attend to protect everyone and future family harmony.

It's tough but best in the long run, we decided and we tie ourselves up in knots at times finding excuses!!

Edited Sat January 13, 2024 9:38am

Mantis

Member since
January 2024

16 posts

Posted Sat January 13, 2024 10:12amReport post

Thanks for your responses. I think on the principle of them not knowing and we aren't ready to tell, it is probably best that we have the flu this weekend :(

CornishTea

Member since
August 2019

91 posts

Posted Sat January 13, 2024 5:14pmReport post

Hi,

It's an awful situation and the imapct on family life is huge even pre court/sentencing etc.

I know it is difficult but one thing i found hard was the thought that I would become socially isolated as a result. Although your OH may not be able to go you should try to go to events. It is hard on your own but you also need to do things that are enjoyable.

Cornish Tea xx

Inturmoil1974

Member since
November 2022

278 posts

Posted Sat January 13, 2024 9:37pmReport post

I second cornish tea please make the excuse about your oh not going but please try and go on your own x

Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2554 posts

Posted Sun January 14, 2024 6:48amReport post

I can understand your stresses. Our early family gatherings were an absolute nightmare for me. I worried for weeks beforehand. I had fears something being accidentally said, the children innocently asking where my son was - felt flustered and uncomfortable. Hated it.......

Nowadays much better as I realise I am surrounded by people that love me. It's important you fight to preserve those ties.

Not sure if this will help you in any way x

Edited Sun January 14, 2024 6:52am