Getting OH home
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OK it's a long story. Oh is out of prison which he spent 9 months and finishes his 9 month liscence on Saturday with then 3 months supervision. We have virtually been on a CIN plan for over 3 years couple of month break before release. We have had 10 SWs. I have fully supervised contact but we haven't been able to live together since the knock Nov 2020.
He lived at a Cas3 property after release, then was homeless, now living in a shared house run by homeless charity. Anyway I've been fully compliant with SS done inform and breaking the Cycle. Since release SS recommended an independent risk assessment which they paid for. Prof Leam Craig completed it and it's all good.
CIN meeting last Monday and they have said OH can come home to visit one evening a week and a couple of hours one day of the weekend. Then I get a call from SS to say we nerd to sign something to say we accept this and there closing the case as probation and Somu don't think he should come home.
SS obviously don't think there's an issue if closing the case. I can't believe they have been in our lives this long and now he can visit the family home there closing it no mention of any progression unless case gets re opened.
He lived at a Cas3 property after release, then was homeless, now living in a shared house run by homeless charity. Anyway I've been fully compliant with SS done inform and breaking the Cycle. Since release SS recommended an independent risk assessment which they paid for. Prof Leam Craig completed it and it's all good.
CIN meeting last Monday and they have said OH can come home to visit one evening a week and a couple of hours one day of the weekend. Then I get a call from SS to say we nerd to sign something to say we accept this and there closing the case as probation and Somu don't think he should come home.
SS obviously don't think there's an issue if closing the case. I can't believe they have been in our lives this long and now he can visit the family home there closing it no mention of any progression unless case gets re opened.
Hi,
hopefully someone with more knowledge will answer your question but I'll give advice based on what I would do.
Probation wouldn't be recommending that he returns home at this stage as they won't have completed much in the way of risk assessment or seen how he engages with them and any rehabilitation courses etc.
I think you can request to stay on cin and state that you'd like your child/childrens mental state monitored once contact in the home starts as this may be a big change for them given the amount of time that has passed since the last time your OH was in the home.
Alternatively you can agree to the terms of contact that ss are recommending, it's important to remember that at cin they are recommendations only. I'm not saying that you shouldn't agree to them but it is ok to push back on their recommendations by suggesting other options such as a review in six months time or even a year. This gives probation a chance to build a relationship with your OH and perhaps yourself if you're all open to that and hopefully support you with ss when time comes for a review.
I remember the feeling of relief when ss said they were closing the case and I'd not had as much involvement as yourself so I know sometimes we get tired of having the same conversation over and over. Make sure you read the report and anything they ask you to sign and point out any errors before signing. That's important and something I didn't do as I didn't have the report until weeks after case closed. I've never been asked to sign anything but I know every sw team works differently xxx
hopefully someone with more knowledge will answer your question but I'll give advice based on what I would do.
Probation wouldn't be recommending that he returns home at this stage as they won't have completed much in the way of risk assessment or seen how he engages with them and any rehabilitation courses etc.
I think you can request to stay on cin and state that you'd like your child/childrens mental state monitored once contact in the home starts as this may be a big change for them given the amount of time that has passed since the last time your OH was in the home.
Alternatively you can agree to the terms of contact that ss are recommending, it's important to remember that at cin they are recommendations only. I'm not saying that you shouldn't agree to them but it is ok to push back on their recommendations by suggesting other options such as a review in six months time or even a year. This gives probation a chance to build a relationship with your OH and perhaps yourself if you're all open to that and hopefully support you with ss when time comes for a review.
I remember the feeling of relief when ss said they were closing the case and I'd not had as much involvement as yourself so I know sometimes we get tired of having the same conversation over and over. Make sure you read the report and anything they ask you to sign and point out any errors before signing. That's important and something I didn't do as I didn't have the report until weeks after case closed. I've never been asked to sign anything but I know every sw team works differently xxx
Thanks but he has completed work with probation and finishes his license on Saturday with 3 months supervision left so they should have completed his risk assessment. I just don't get it that SS don't think there is any risk but not giving us any ideas how to move it forward when we are ready to. We have already said we want to take it slowly for everyone not just our son.
I feel now the forensic risk assessment is done, they don't know what to do but are giving us a little and they think that's OK. They say we can't keep CIN open for no reason but they have for 3 years with no clear plan, no goals, no actions from month to month. That's my plan ask them to keep it open until we have got to where we want to be as much as I want rid of them. Or give us the responsibility to progress when we are ready.
I feel now the forensic risk assessment is done, they don't know what to do but are giving us a little and they think that's OK. They say we can't keep CIN open for no reason but they have for 3 years with no clear plan, no goals, no actions from month to month. That's my plan ask them to keep it open until we have got to where we want to be as much as I want rid of them. Or give us the responsibility to progress when we are ready.
Hey
I'm not sure on the licence part and that because my oh got suspended but we managed to get him home 3 months later on a phased return. He had contact every day at home throughout bail. Surely you should be doing a phased return to home visits because the children may react badly and not want it. I'd say you don't want case closed and want a phased return gradually progressing over a 8 week period then closer at least a month after that. That's what we did but my oh moved back home. I'm not sure if you want that or not. You can inbox me if I can help I will
I'm not sure on the licence part and that because my oh got suspended but we managed to get him home 3 months later on a phased return. He had contact every day at home throughout bail. Surely you should be doing a phased return to home visits because the children may react badly and not want it. I'd say you don't want case closed and want a phased return gradually progressing over a 8 week period then closer at least a month after that. That's what we did but my oh moved back home. I'm not sure if you want that or not. You can inbox me if I can help I will
Hey Bigdee,
That does sound frustrating that SS wants to close the case already when there's still progress to be made. I agree asking to keep it open while you work on a gradual phased return plan seems reasonable.
That does sound frustrating that SS wants to close the case already when there's still progress to be made. I agree asking to keep it open while you work on a gradual phased return plan seems reasonable.