No Further Action
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We got 'the knock' on 8th December 2023. Bang on 2 months later, my ex-OH gets a call from the duty solicitor saying that there will be no further action, and bail conditions are lifted (we have a toddler together).
Unfortunately due to things that transpired before in our relationship, and what I was told by him after the knock, I knew I couldn't stay with him. The trust, and the hurt was too much. I have never felt so alone, hurt, and angry as the last couple of months, especially with dealing with social services and looking after our little one as the primary parent. I'm considering therapy or counselling for anxiety and trauma from what's happened.
I know this is 100% the best case scenario, and I'm super happy for my little ones dad that he can start to look at the future. I also know we're very lucky in that we haven't had to wait 6 months+ like in the majority of the cases. There's a big flag as to why it's turned around so quickly, but I'm not going to question it.
I guess I want to know how I move forward? It's been such an isolating time, and until we sell the property we both own (it's on the market), I feel like I can't move on, and I'm stuck. Every time the door knocks my heart races, and I'm not sleeping well. My little one is thriving and she is honestly the only person I'm around, where I just feel completely normal... like nothing has happened.
Unfortunately due to things that transpired before in our relationship, and what I was told by him after the knock, I knew I couldn't stay with him. The trust, and the hurt was too much. I have never felt so alone, hurt, and angry as the last couple of months, especially with dealing with social services and looking after our little one as the primary parent. I'm considering therapy or counselling for anxiety and trauma from what's happened.
I know this is 100% the best case scenario, and I'm super happy for my little ones dad that he can start to look at the future. I also know we're very lucky in that we haven't had to wait 6 months+ like in the majority of the cases. There's a big flag as to why it's turned around so quickly, but I'm not going to question it.
I guess I want to know how I move forward? It's been such an isolating time, and until we sell the property we both own (it's on the market), I feel like I can't move on, and I'm stuck. Every time the door knocks my heart races, and I'm not sleeping well. My little one is thriving and she is honestly the only person I'm around, where I just feel completely normal... like nothing has happened.
Hi,
I think counselling would be a good step to take, perhaps with someone who specialises in this area because the ability to speak freely without judgement is key.
In terms of how you move forward, I'd recommend creating a list of the practical things that need doing in order to separate finances etc. Identifying what you want from your life and focusing on the things you can do to make this a reality. One step at a time, you will get there. Sometimes we think we have to be able to see exactly how everything will look but you only need to be able to know what needs to happen to get to the next step. By doing the practical stuff and having counselling you'll find that your mental state will catch up xxx
I think counselling would be a good step to take, perhaps with someone who specialises in this area because the ability to speak freely without judgement is key.
In terms of how you move forward, I'd recommend creating a list of the practical things that need doing in order to separate finances etc. Identifying what you want from your life and focusing on the things you can do to make this a reality. One step at a time, you will get there. Sometimes we think we have to be able to see exactly how everything will look but you only need to be able to know what needs to happen to get to the next step. By doing the practical stuff and having counselling you'll find that your mental state will catch up xxx