Family and Friends Forum

Dreaming

Member since
February 2024

7 posts

Posted Fri February 9, 2024 11:24amReport post

Hello I am new to this forum. I got the knock 7 days ago.

My son is the offender, our life as we knew it and our family has been ripped apart.

I don't really know what to do he trying to get help but how do you live how to you ever carry on each day because I am finding it hard. Everyday is a roller coaster of emotions.

I have an amazing daughter who has been helping us but I worry about the toll its taking on her too.

I feel like my son is a stranger to me know not the kind caring lovely son I once knew. I will do everything I can to support him and to get help but I am struggling.

Thankyou just need so help or advive.

Mandymoo

Member since
September 2021

295 posts

Posted Fri February 9, 2024 11:34amReport post

You've come to the right place. There are a lot of mums on here including myself. It's still very early days for you so the shock is immense but it will subside somewhat over the coming months. You son is the same lovely man he's always been so never forget that and as you learn more about what he's done and become more knowledgeable you will realise there are so many reasons for it. My inbox is always open xx

EBP

Member since
September 2021

198 posts

Posted Fri February 9, 2024 12:51pmReport post

So sorry I that you have had to join us on this forum,but you will find that is the one place you can receive genuine support.

My son is also an offender. Each day has to be handled on its own. Very hard to not replan your future,but try to manage one day at a time. As a mother you want to 'help' your child,even if they are an adult. There is so much we have to learn that we don't want to.

Please ring the helpline & encourage him to do the same. You will be listened separately & both helped.

This forum has supported me in the darkest times & continues to do so.

There are several posts relating to sons,rather than partners.

Please try to do the things that you enjoy whenever possible.

Dreaming

Member since
February 2024

7 posts

Posted Fri February 9, 2024 1:22pmReport post

Thank you for your replies.

Yes its early days and I suppose I am still in shock. Its hard to imagine the future and what it will be like. At the moment I am finding it hard to leave the house let alone go back to work, see friends and family all the normal things. I just dont know how any of us will.

I have rang the helpline and they were such a help also my son has, he has opened up about what happened and how he ended up down this path, if only he had opened up before about how he was feeling but I know you cant look back.

Thankyou for support and advice. What amazing people in this group.

Seaside

Member since
July 2022

561 posts

Posted Fri February 9, 2024 4:31pmReport post

I'm also a Mum of an adult son on here and echo what others have said.

The early days are very hard so please do phone the helpline and message me if I can be of any help.

The amazing people on here have kept me going through the very darkest times and there is never any judgement we are all here to help and support each other xx

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2403 posts

Posted Fri February 9, 2024 4:43pmReport post

Dreaming x

So sorry you have found yourself here x

My son is also the reason why I am here

It is early days so just try to get through each day at a time, my daughter has been my rock throughout this journey and she herself struggled but she was there every step of the way, keep phoning the helpline and reach out to your GP also, how is your son doing?xx

Ocean

Member since
September 2023

771 posts

Posted Fri February 9, 2024 7:53pmReport post

I'm also here because of my adult son and know from exoerience how hard it is to see your grown up child broken and not being able to do anything to put it right. I'm here for you if there is anything I can do to support and help you.

Dreaming

Member since
February 2024

7 posts

Posted Sun February 11, 2024 1:28pmReport post

Thankyou for your replies it really helps to communicate with people going through the same thing.

I am struggling through somehow, I am full of anxiety and don't really knownwhat to do, how to carry on.

I am concerned for my son's wellbeing. He is full of shame and remorse for what he has done and is very depressed. He has cut himself off from everyone, he does open up to me but that's it and I worry about him. He knows what he has done has now effected not only his life but family life and he can't see a way out of this. I am trying to be positive for him but ai am so scared.