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Two weeks exactly since the knock

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JustMeAndTheCat

Member since
February 2024

16 posts

Posted Mon February 19, 2024 6:07pmReport post

Never in a million years would I have imagined the horror of the past two weeks. I answered the door on a normal afternoon to four people asking for my partner. Later discovered they were vigilantes, which I had never heard of. They spent a long time confronting him on the doorstep in front of the whole neighbourhood, lots of raised voices and pointing and waving papers . Shouting that the police were coming. I was inside the house mostly, but when I did go out I heard him admit that he had sent personal pics (if you get what I mean) and been having conversations with minors, I think teenage girls, at which point I ran inside and locked the door. The police came in two cars with blue lights, lots more talk outside and then he was taken away. Then the humiliation of police searching my house. Since then I have found another phone hidden, with emails from another address to whoever, I couldn't bear to look, which I have handed in.

He is out on bail, the liaison picked up his stuff, I refuse to let him come back. It's my house, thankfully. No idea where he has gone, sleeping under a bridge or in his car for all I care. I feel sick and ashamed and angry and heartbroken. 22 years of my life wiped out. No idea what will happen, but I hope he goes to prison.

Sorry for the long rant

K4

Member since
October 2022

611 posts

Posted Mon February 19, 2024 6:36pmReport post

Sorry that you find yourself here. There is an excellent post in the "understanding why" which gives some super advice on surviving the early days.



the trauma and grief of the situation you're in can manifest in unsettling ways, do reach out for help when you need it



xx

AnxiousGirl

Member since
December 2023

222 posts

Posted Mon February 19, 2024 11:21pmReport post

Post deleted


Edited Thu February 22, 2024 8:46am

Losteverything

Member since
September 2022

216 posts

Posted Tue February 20, 2024 12:15amReport post

Justmeandthecat... I can sympathise with you. I feel differently to a lot of women on here. I also hope my ex goes to prison and I don't care what happens to him. He didn't care about me when he did what he did !!
focus on your own life now x

JustMeAndTheCat

Member since
February 2024

16 posts

Posted Tue February 20, 2024 6:36pmReport post

Thanks all. I just feel so so angry that he would do such an appauling thing. How could I not have suspected? He has thrown away everything, our comfortable life together, his children and grandchildren, me. Idiot

Edited Tue February 20, 2024 6:37pm

Losteverything

Member since
September 2022

216 posts

Posted Thu February 22, 2024 2:57amReport post

I agree with you. My ex has also ruined everything we had together. I am having to start again in my late 50's and make a new life for myself. I have done this and so will you.
many on here believe men don't even think about the consequences of their actions because they are in the grips of an addiction. I personally think my ex did it because a. He thinks he can do whatever he wants at the time and b. He's obviously got a problem!!!!

Edited by moderator Thu February 22, 2024 8:51am