Experiences & Expectations regarding the police.
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It's been a while since posting on here.
we got the knock in June 23. For the first 6 months we had no contact from the police. Since Jan 24 my husband has been having "check ins" with a police officer every 2 weeks. Mainly because he is now a suicide risk but I was just wondering if anyone has had a similar experience? Should these 2 week checks should have been happening from the start? I'm still baffled that it's taking so long to scan our items. He's been accused of uploading 3 images to a Facebook page. He doesn't even have Facebook! I would think that due to it being a crime surrounding children it should have been dealt with fairly promptly? I have seen from some posts that some of you have been going through this process for a few years and I just can't see how the police can expect us to just crack on like everything is okay?! It's completely derailed our lives!
we got the knock in June 23. For the first 6 months we had no contact from the police. Since Jan 24 my husband has been having "check ins" with a police officer every 2 weeks. Mainly because he is now a suicide risk but I was just wondering if anyone has had a similar experience? Should these 2 week checks should have been happening from the start? I'm still baffled that it's taking so long to scan our items. He's been accused of uploading 3 images to a Facebook page. He doesn't even have Facebook! I would think that due to it being a crime surrounding children it should have been dealt with fairly promptly? I have seen from some posts that some of you have been going through this process for a few years and I just can't see how the police can expect us to just crack on like everything is okay?! It's completely derailed our lives!
Hi Bubba,
Mum of adult offending son here who now lives with us. My understanding after 14 months of waiting for device checks to be completed is that yes, the police do have a responsibility of care towards those they are in charge of but in reality what happens to our son is that if the OIC wants something from him the call will begin with a chirpy 'hi there , how's things?' followed by whatever the request is. The answer he would like to give is that he'd be a whole lot better if they'd do their jobs a bit quicker but he feels obliged to not ruffle any feathers. I think he's had 3 calls like this since his arrest, the only one specifically being a welfare check coming a week after that date so probably in the book of actions needed after an arrest when they probably assume the greatest risk of harm might come whereas i think that it could just as equally be as time lags on and on and life has to be lived in such a stressful way.
I agree totally about the toll this wait takes on everyone's lives.
Mum of adult offending son here who now lives with us. My understanding after 14 months of waiting for device checks to be completed is that yes, the police do have a responsibility of care towards those they are in charge of but in reality what happens to our son is that if the OIC wants something from him the call will begin with a chirpy 'hi there , how's things?' followed by whatever the request is. The answer he would like to give is that he'd be a whole lot better if they'd do their jobs a bit quicker but he feels obliged to not ruffle any feathers. I think he's had 3 calls like this since his arrest, the only one specifically being a welfare check coming a week after that date so probably in the book of actions needed after an arrest when they probably assume the greatest risk of harm might come whereas i think that it could just as equally be as time lags on and on and life has to be lived in such a stressful way.
I agree totally about the toll this wait takes on everyone's lives.
My OH has had no contact from the police. We're almost six months from arrest. Due to go back for his second bail meeting soon. He tried several times to get in touch with the liaison officer but calls were unanswered and messages and emails which he left for a call back were not returned. When he went for his first bail meeting the OIC asked if he'd had contact with the liaison team when he told him his experience the officer kind of just shrugged his shoulders. He asked my OH if he wanted the contact details again but he kindly declined saying he didn't think there was much point now.
@Bubba I'm so sorry your Husband is struggling so much with his mental health and is now a risk to himself. This must be an incredibly difficult you too. Sadly the time-frame from arrest to sentencing can be painfully long. Have either of you accessed support or spoken to anyone through LFF? It sounds like you both need support to help you navigate the emotional impact of this journey safely x
Hi Bubba (and others!). I know I have suggested this in the past, but if you haven't already contacted them, I can recommend 'Safer Lives' for specialist guidance and support for your husband.
They are very experienced in this area, and the team include highly experienced ex-probation people. They are incredibly supportive, non-judgemental and really do want the best for all impacted people. They are heavily focussed on turning perpetrators' thinking away from suicidal thoughts.
An extract from their website: "Have you been arrested for offences involving indecent images, sexual communications, voyeurism, or indecent exposure? Do you feel overwhelmed and isolated? Whether you've been released on bail, are under investigation, or awaiting court dates, know that you're not alone. We offer independent and non-judgmental advice and guidance tailored to your individual situation. Our one-to-one services give specialised welfare and behavioural support, helping you gain clarity and move forward in a way that is safe for you and others."
They are very experienced in this area, and the team include highly experienced ex-probation people. They are incredibly supportive, non-judgemental and really do want the best for all impacted people. They are heavily focussed on turning perpetrators' thinking away from suicidal thoughts.
An extract from their website: "Have you been arrested for offences involving indecent images, sexual communications, voyeurism, or indecent exposure? Do you feel overwhelmed and isolated? Whether you've been released on bail, are under investigation, or awaiting court dates, know that you're not alone. We offer independent and non-judgmental advice and guidance tailored to your individual situation. Our one-to-one services give specialised welfare and behavioural support, helping you gain clarity and move forward in a way that is safe for you and others."