Family and Friends Forum

Dad005

Member since
March 2024

49 posts

Posted Fri March 8, 2024 5:06pmReport post

hi,



We are about 7 months after the knock. My son was questioned and then charged. He wasnt living with me at the time. We have attended magistrates and it has now been referred to crown, which is possibly this month, there is a hold up with pre sentencing report.



Where do you all go for help with this ?? Is there any free help for my son ??

I am going out of my mind with it all, can't get my head around this. I could do with some help for all of us to cope.

Just want an end to it

Member since
October 2023

212 posts

Posted Fri March 8, 2024 5:24pmReport post

Hi, He can do the Inform course with the Lucy Faithfull foundation and both of you can use the Stop it now helpline, they helped us loads.

Ocean

Member since
September 2023

772 posts

Posted Fri March 8, 2024 5:49pmReport post

Hi, I'm here too because of my son so know how hard and painful this journey is.

If neither of you have reached out for support from your GP that might be a good starting point. You can also both contact the free Stop it Now helpline for support. Talking therapies provide free mental health support and you can self refer to this device.

For yourself and other family members you can also contact Talking Forwards which is an organisation that provides free online peer support groups a couple of times a month.

You've also got this forum which many people have found help, guidance, support and friendship from.

How is your son doing? The time between magistrates court and Crown court are so difficult so it's great that he has you there for support.

Dad005

Member since
March 2024

49 posts

Posted Sat March 9, 2024 11:12amReport post

Thankyou so much for your replies.



My son unfortunately has spoke about taking his own life, he took an overdose before magistrates. He really does not want to face it.



As a parent, this is a whole new, difficult world for me. I struggle to come to terms with all of it and him being so unhappy that he wants to end his life.

I have never been so upset !!!



Thankyou for your messages, it's great to know I'm not alone

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2403 posts

Posted Sat March 9, 2024 6:13pmReport post

Dad x

Deep breath, welcome to a forum no one wishes to be on but a place you can find nothing but understanding and support

Reach out to us here an know you are not alone,

Call and speak to LFF helpline no matter what you say they can guide both you and your son to get some important support

This journey is a long Road to be on but if I could offer just one bit of advice is you are not on your own

Each day is a milestone but the fact you are wanting to be there is an abundance of sheer strength and determination so do not forget that x

AlwaysHopeful

Member since
March 2023

133 posts

Posted Sun March 10, 2024 6:26pmReport post

Hello, it's so easy to put this all to back of your mind as best you can, but then when it comes up again you start to panic. I definately did that. Your GP for anyone that feels like they are struggling with their mental health through this which is completely normal. I don't have experience with courses or anything other than Stopitnow so I would give the helpline a call and they should be able to give you advice and point you in the direction of the right help for you and your family. And if you have questions about anything, ask everyone here because someone will have the answer. The bright side to your sons case is that you are going to court and it's only been 7 months which is rare. You are close to an outcome and will be able to move on soon, have on in there

EBP

Member since
September 2021

198 posts

Posted Sun March 10, 2024 6:39pmReport post

Are you a Dad?
I am interested to find out if men deal with this in a different way. How important is the family name? Is the attitude to porn,different?
I am not criticising men/fathers, just trying to help my husband to deal with our son's offences.

Dad005

Member since
March 2024

49 posts

Posted Sun March 10, 2024 9:28pmReport post

Thankyou all for your messages, I just love to know I am not alone dealing with this.

Yes I am a dad. I don't know if it's any different for a dad to be honest. I still see him as my little boy, if that makes sense. The family name obviously relates to me and my family but I think it affects everybody.



My son has been to his gp and is signed off as he lost his job and moved out of where he was.



It still seems to be the worst nightmare ever, probably not the best in the world at talking about my emotions to all of this ( that maybe a male thing ) I find it hard to explain how I feel, sorry x