So what happens now??
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Hi. 4 hours ago I had no idea that this forum existed. Yet, here I am.
There was a knock on the door this morning, I was in bed. My husband answered and I heard voices which was unusual. I went downstairs and it was the police in plain clothes telling me that they'd arrested him. Not entirely sure why as because he's an adult they couldn't tell me. He's just said they say I've been talking to minors online.
My house has gone from having 4 police officers going through every inch of it to just me and the dog. Sat here waiting for the call to tell me what's happening.
My step daughter who is 18 is at work and I'm terrified of what I might need to tell her when she gets home. Especially if the police tell me he can't come home.
The worst thing is that my husband is my best friend and the person I want to be able to talk to above anyone is him. And I can't. And I'm so scared.
There was a knock on the door this morning, I was in bed. My husband answered and I heard voices which was unusual. I went downstairs and it was the police in plain clothes telling me that they'd arrested him. Not entirely sure why as because he's an adult they couldn't tell me. He's just said they say I've been talking to minors online.
My house has gone from having 4 police officers going through every inch of it to just me and the dog. Sat here waiting for the call to tell me what's happening.
My step daughter who is 18 is at work and I'm terrified of what I might need to tell her when she gets home. Especially if the police tell me he can't come home.
The worst thing is that my husband is my best friend and the person I want to be able to talk to above anyone is him. And I can't. And I'm so scared.
Hi,
I am sorry that tou have found yourself here. I know its the worst feeling. You go through all sorts of emotions. Reach out on here for help, there are amazing people on here with great advice.
They almost certainly release him at some point today and probably on bail. Then it will be a big waiting game.
I hope this helps, don't be afraid to ask on here, if you are unsure or want to know anything.
Take care and also look after yourself x
I am sorry that tou have found yourself here. I know its the worst feeling. You go through all sorts of emotions. Reach out on here for help, there are amazing people on here with great advice.
They almost certainly release him at some point today and probably on bail. Then it will be a big waiting game.
I hope this helps, don't be afraid to ask on here, if you are unsure or want to know anything.
Take care and also look after yourself x
Thank you. Just knowing I'm not alone has actually already helped.
And as horrible as it was having the police here, especially as I was still in my dressing gown and very much in need of a shower, they were actually really calming and nice about everything. Completely not what I would have expected.
Just so up and down. Keep thinking of questions I should have asked and waiting for the phone to ring is heartbreaking.
And as horrible as it was having the police here, especially as I was still in my dressing gown and very much in need of a shower, they were actually really calming and nice about everything. Completely not what I would have expected.
Just so up and down. Keep thinking of questions I should have asked and waiting for the phone to ring is heartbreaking.
Hi
You are definitely not alone, I am here because my son. Its a horrible place to find yourself. All sorts of emotions and obviously the shock. For me it was just when life seem to be going so well too. One day can turn your life upside down. I've thought of nothing else for months.
It is the most awful time for you, its just a waiting game. I am sure you will hear something soon.
You are definitely not alone, I am here because my son. Its a horrible place to find yourself. All sorts of emotions and obviously the shock. For me it was just when life seem to be going so well too. One day can turn your life upside down. I've thought of nothing else for months.
It is the most awful time for you, its just a waiting game. I am sure you will hear something soon.
Welcome to the journey nobody wants to be on, my advice is at the take it an hour at a time,i spent too much time looking for answers on the forum that nobody had as everyone has a different journey different outcomes
Just know your not alone x
Just know your not alone x
I'm so sorry this is happening to you. We are here for you. We understand that horrific shock, I will never forget it.
Your mind and heart will be all over the place, and sadly for weeks, months. You have proven your strength by reaching out here today.
The whole experience is traumatising, but I promise you that you will get through it. I have been through hell, but I am now strong(er) than I have ever been.
Please, please do take care of yourself. Reach out to the helpline, your GP, to us.
Love and support X
Your mind and heart will be all over the place, and sadly for weeks, months. You have proven your strength by reaching out here today.
The whole experience is traumatising, but I promise you that you will get through it. I have been through hell, but I am now strong(er) than I have ever been.
Please, please do take care of yourself. Reach out to the helpline, your GP, to us.
Love and support X
So sorry that you have had to join us on this horrific journey.
You are certainly not alone.
I hope your daughter is ok when she finds out.
You will both need a lot of support,primarily from LFF helpline & people on this site.
Write things down,however random.
Take each hour at a time. You can do no more. It is out of your hands & it cannot be reasoned out.
Please keep checking in & no question is taboo or unheard of.
You have done nothing wrong. Keep telling yourself & give your daughter a hug from us all.
You are certainly not alone.
I hope your daughter is ok when she finds out.
You will both need a lot of support,primarily from LFF helpline & people on this site.
Write things down,however random.
Take each hour at a time. You can do no more. It is out of your hands & it cannot be reasoned out.
Please keep checking in & no question is taboo or unheard of.
You have done nothing wrong. Keep telling yourself & give your daughter a hug from us all.
Just to say that my husband has been bailed. He has been released to his mum's house. I have had to tell my step daughter which was horrible. Especially as the police want to talk to her and I have had to explain everything without any support. But as she is 18 as an adult it is entirely down to me. Which is hard
I'm so sorry you find yourself amongst us on this journey. We can all empathise with the trauma experienced. You are amongst people that understand and will support without judgement; only those that have experienced this truly understand and sadly our numbers are growing daily. My only advice at this point is be wary of who you disclose to. Once you have shared you can't take it back. It may feel like your world has fallen apart right now but you will be ok. This changes the trajectory of life but it can be overcome.
Your step-daughter may also find this forum supportive in her own right x
Over on 'Understanding Why' there is a great post by Rainbowgirl80 about surviving the early days. Worth a read x
Your step-daughter may also find this forum supportive in her own right x
Over on 'Understanding Why' there is a great post by Rainbowgirl80 about surviving the early days. Worth a read x
Hi,
Not sure how many people are actually reading this, but to be honest it's mostly the writing it down that's helping me as much as any responses. Police came back today to talk to my step daughter. And they've said that husbands restrictions around that should now be able to be lifted. So he can come home Tuesday or Wednesday. Step daughter isn't sure she wants to see him or have him around so we're going to talk through all of our options, and we have a couple. Including the caravan in the garden.
I called the help line this morning, even though I didn't really know what to say. But they were amazing. Just knowing I'm not alone has helped beyond belief.
Now just to take each day as it comes.
Stay safe x
Not sure how many people are actually reading this, but to be honest it's mostly the writing it down that's helping me as much as any responses. Police came back today to talk to my step daughter. And they've said that husbands restrictions around that should now be able to be lifted. So he can come home Tuesday or Wednesday. Step daughter isn't sure she wants to see him or have him around so we're going to talk through all of our options, and we have a couple. Including the caravan in the garden.
I called the help line this morning, even though I didn't really know what to say. But they were amazing. Just knowing I'm not alone has helped beyond belief.
Now just to take each day as it comes.
Stay safe x
I'm glad to hear that his restriction has been removed and that he is able to return home. Understandably you have a lot to navigate as a family and emotions are still very raw. It will settle in time x