Family and Friends Forum

Devestatedwife

Member since
October 2023

61 posts

Posted Tue March 26, 2024 5:30pmReport post

I am really struggling mentally this week .



my husband was charged last week



possssion

making

distribution (making and distributing was sending me a video of our son dancing with no clothes on) I can't believe this charge .



anyway . I'm struggling myself . I've a social worker coming on Friday for a monthly visit they are always short and sweet but just with the charges now in place and contact including phone calls between him and the children stopped I'm not looking forward to it .



I suppose she is only being honest but she's so negative about the outcome and it's really giving me major anxiety . She's talking about how the children will cope if it's custodial etc . Asking me have I thought about media exposure as well .



even the thought of this makes me feel sick . I'm really struggling and I feel for my kids so much

hpl111

Member since
November 2022

392 posts

Posted Tue March 26, 2024 6:10pmReport post

@Devastedwife

I am sorry you are struggling.

I'm not a legal expert, but I'm sure the distribution charge will be dropped. It's ridiculous.

I find the social worker reckless that she won't allow the phone calls between your husband and kids anymore. Ask her how this will affect them?

Social services do a lot of damage, in my opinion.

hpl111

Member since
November 2022

392 posts

Posted Tue March 26, 2024 6:11pmReport post

Also, I would like to add, it isn't custodial for the large majority of first-time offences.

Devestatedwife

Member since
October 2023

61 posts

Posted Tue March 26, 2024 6:20pmReport post

Thank you for the reply .



I homeTSly feel like I don't want to talk to the social worker any more than I have to . I will do whatever they ask me to do for the children but in terms of any more communication or questions I'm just not comfortable .



I know my ex is with a solicitor trying to get the restrictions lifted so I think I'm just going to leave it to them .



yes I also think the distribution and making charge is ridiculous. I can't believe that its unbelievable. I don't support him in any way and we have seperated permanently from the night of the knock but come on .



he was advised it it now with CPS which can take 6 to 18 months .



im getting through each day at the minute telling my self this won't be forever even if it is another 18 months .



im so scared for my kids that they won't get to see their dad for a long time . It's already been about 3 months since they have seen him with contact stopped . It's so hard .



social services have said he won't be able to see the children until a risk assessment is carried out and god knows when that will be . Plus these new added charges . It's an absolute nightmare

hpl111

Member since
November 2022

392 posts

Posted Tue March 26, 2024 7:12pmReport post

6-18 months, that's ridiculous!

I hope the journey comes to a quick conclusion and that your kids can see their daf again soon.

Remember to do something kind for yourself everyday, if you can.

EllBee

Member since
April 2022

144 posts

Posted Tue March 26, 2024 9:42pmReport post

I am so sorry you are having a difficult time of it Devastated, some weeks are harder than others in our heads. I am struggling too, it's just the time it's taking. We are two years and two months in and OH has only just had the second interview, so it hasn't even gone to the CPS yet. The thought of another 6-18 months more to wait makes me so angry, it is sheer torture on all of us families. There is no justice in our justice system ????

Devestatedwife

Member since
October 2023

61 posts

Posted Tue March 26, 2024 9:56pmReport post

Ellebee so sorry to hear you have been waiting for that length of time .



my person only had one interview with police that's it . It's been handed to cps now .



it's been about 6 months from the knock to interview

EllBee

Member since
April 2022

144 posts

Posted Tue March 26, 2024 11:32pmReport post

I am genuinely pleased for you that it's not taken ages, obviously it's a sh!tey situation however long it takes but at least it's not strung out. Well with the next bit, I hope not for your sake! Our OIC had the devices back last June and it took until March to get him in for an interview. Unbelievable