Family and Friends Forum

Its an incredible shock isnt it and such a scary time. Its very early days you do not have to or need to make any decisions about life. I wont lie its not going to be easy but just take one day at a time. The police will tell you whats on the computers but the process to check them is very long. As you have children you are likely to have child services visiting if you havent already. Im several months in and my husband cannot live at home but its not impossible. My situation is to do with communication not images but it will depend what hes done and what social services view is as to whether he can live at home, meetings and risk assessments need to be done. Take the pressure off yourself if you can and try not to think to far in the future. I find getting through one bit at a time helps with the stress and enormity of the situation. You really dont need to make any life changing decisions yet unless you really want to.

Its really diffiuclt when there are children involved. Like you my husband and I hadnt been married long when the knock came although we had dated for a while and have known each other 18 years. Because you havr children social services will be involved. The best bit of advice I had was to remember they are working in the childrens best interest and not yours. Work with them and do whatever you have to to keep your children safe and show that you are safe guarding then.

I will say my husband was done for downloading images and i was told that if i were to stay with him i would lose my job and worse of all my daughter would be taken into care. That was what made me make my decision. You may find that if he is charged then you wont be able to live together again.

But most importantly is not to make a decision now. Things are still uncertain and until you know you cant make that decision. Just do what feels right for you and take it a day at a time