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First Time out

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Inturmoil1974

Member since
November 2022

279 posts

Posted Sun April 21, 2024 12:32amReport post

First time out socialising in village since media attention and I have to say the anxiety before I went was horrendous but honestly I got lots of great to see you and how you doing and fot that I am grateful I could tell my friends were keeping a close eye on me and for that I am also grateful to know how much friends and family have my back, I decided to stick to soft drinks but glad I went now, another small step taken in this journey of a 1000 miles.

Good night all

EllBee

Member since
April 2022

144 posts

Posted Sun April 21, 2024 1:01amReport post

Brilliant!
That takes courage, determination and strength. Huge milestone, well done Xx

Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2555 posts

Posted Sun April 21, 2024 7:06amReport post

Well done - you did fantastic. I was terrified socialising after my sons arrest especially after the media circus.

I thought everyone was staring and pointing at us. But they weren't, our friends obviously knew what had happened but respectfully waited for us to talk about it when ready. I did hear unsavoury things were said about our son, but sadly you have to accept it and move on...... Its too much of a distressing fight to change stubborn attitudes /opinions and after all we were innocent and didn't want to loose 'our' friends.

Edited Sun April 21, 2024 7:14am

Inturmoil1974

Member since
November 2022

279 posts

Posted Sun April 21, 2024 7:47amReport post

Smile I am realising now that the People who matter the most are the ones who don't treat us any different the keyboard warriors don't matter they were never true friends in the first place. I am now at the stage I don't want to talk about it with others I just want to be the new normal, close friends I have had the chat with, other friends have been respectful like yours and only spoke about it when I have brought it up, I still do wonder if our marriage will work as there is still a lot of work to do, oh needs to know we can't go back to what we were he needs to move onto a new life, if the past had been good he wouldn't have been looking at porn as an escape, yes I know it was a link he clicked on but if he hadn't been on kik for porn in first place there would be no link to click on, I respect he doesn't want to be sociable but he has to respect I am a sociable person and want to continue to be, who knows what lies ahead for us x

Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2555 posts

Posted Sun April 21, 2024 8:58amReport post

You soon sort out the people that matter in your life - that's so true. I'm well prepared now if I'm asked about my son, I just say we've lost contact, it hurts like hell to dismiss him like that but it stops any further questions...... and personally halts any extra anxiety.

i think it's very important to try your best to continue to have a social life, but it is very hard to get back into the swing and get back that confidence.

As for the keyboard warriors they are responding to the crappy slant the media added to our stories, they are ignorant to the truth....... waste of space.......

Edited Sun April 21, 2024 9:03am

rainyday52

Member since
April 2023

450 posts

Posted Sun April 21, 2024 11:01amReport post

I'm so pleased to hear this and I hope it can inspire others reading it to get that bit of extra courage to step back into the world outside of all this hell xx

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2403 posts

Posted Sun April 21, 2024 11:58amReport post

Inturmoil x

Amazing well done you this is a huge step and you have done it x our minds are our own worst enemy xx

Ocean

Member since
September 2023

772 posts

Posted Sun April 21, 2024 4:11pmReport post

Inturmoil, I'm so pleased to read this and well done you for acknowledging that anxiety but still taking that big step forward. I'm like you in that I focus on the people who have chosen to stay in our lives as they are the friends and family that are important to me.

K4

Member since
October 2022

611 posts

Posted Sun April 21, 2024 6:09pmReport post

That's amazing, well done and lovely to hear x