Denial
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Hi everyone. Hope your Tuesday is going well.
I'm about 2 2/1 months into this and actually having an ok day. I've had to accept and tell my children that my OH won't ever be back. We all miss our life together before the knock and will grieve for the future we planned.
He is denying a charge of sexual communication though the police say the offence is linked to our IP and his phone number saying he's relying on police to figure out how it could have happened. Personally I couldn't carry the guilt of knowing id done anything wrong never mind that. I'd have to tell someone, admit my my wrongdoing. It leaves me wondering who on earth this person is that I loved so much, built a home with, trusted to protect my children and all children exactly the way I do.
on the plus side I'm assuming I will get a better understanding as he has given me full disclosure from his solicitor.
I'm about 2 2/1 months into this and actually having an ok day. I've had to accept and tell my children that my OH won't ever be back. We all miss our life together before the knock and will grieve for the future we planned.
He is denying a charge of sexual communication though the police say the offence is linked to our IP and his phone number saying he's relying on police to figure out how it could have happened. Personally I couldn't carry the guilt of knowing id done anything wrong never mind that. I'd have to tell someone, admit my my wrongdoing. It leaves me wondering who on earth this person is that I loved so much, built a home with, trusted to protect my children and all children exactly the way I do.
on the plus side I'm assuming I will get a better understanding as he has given me full disclosure from his solicitor.
Im so sorry that you have had to go through this, is your oh allowed to still see your kids with supervision my person was able to have supervision and he had been viewing images as well as a communication with a child for 2 year until he has been sentenced last week. I had to grieve the life we had he was always great and loved his kids but things are just never going the the same again. I kind of think if he hadn't done what he had we could of had some great times ahead I felt I couldn't Carry on a relationship because of what he had done some days I feel so angry and angry then days I'm fine and accept what has happened. You are not alone though. Have you got family and friends support that really helped me a lot. X
Hi Gin
I've read your posts and I feel so much for you and your children!
he isn't allowed any contact at all, he's not my children's father but has been the most amazing stepfather to them. They felt so safe and loved, the complete opposite to how their dad made them feel and treated them. They began to thrive in every area of their lives since we have been together. Now that has been taken away! Unfortunately I don't have friends or family around so this forum is a lifeline really xx
I've read your posts and I feel so much for you and your children!
he isn't allowed any contact at all, he's not my children's father but has been the most amazing stepfather to them. They felt so safe and loved, the complete opposite to how their dad made them feel and treated them. They began to thrive in every area of their lives since we have been together. Now that has been taken away! Unfortunately I don't have friends or family around so this forum is a lifeline really xx
It is so hard to come to terms with I feel like irs been similar to a death in my opinion the person I thought I knew isn't the same person it's like they have gone now and never coming back and I think I have gone through all the emotions getting though the Loss of relationship now having to manage the kids emotions with there dad not being able to see them anymore I always thought he was a great dad until he did what he did. I wonder if in the future your person could see the children supervised if that's what you and children both want and is allowed? If you ever need to message me you can. I totally understand how you are feeling. X
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I really hope for a good outcome for you and that the charges do get dropped if he is innocent but I was told it very rarely is a mistake when they are arrested as when I got the knock I was feeling it was maybe a mistake he didn't maybe realise the age of the pics he was looking at etc . My persons defence was he couldn't remember what he had done and was maybe drunk when he did what he did! I think sometimes they can be in denial that they have done anything wrong and it easier to say they haven't then admit to the person they love.
just take each day as it comes and hugs to you and your Children as it's so hard to get used to the new normal but it does get easier. Xx
just take each day as it comes and hugs to you and your Children as it's so hard to get used to the new normal but it does get easier. Xx