Help Needed
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My husband was arrested 6 months ago for grooming of a 14 year old. Police and SS were convinced that he would go to court. Just found out that the CPS have said that it was more of an emotional relationship than a sexual one despite there being tons of rather sickening evidence.
Now that the bail and charges are being dropped. I've been told by SS that I need to protect my children and that they must not have unsupervised contact. I know as soon as he finds out he will be home (not been allowed home or with the children unsupervised all of this time). I don't want him home as this would put the children on the child protection register.
Our house is in both our names. Is there anything I can do to stop him walking back in as if nothing has happened? The trust has completely gone due to all of the lies he has told and he has no remorse but is behaving like the victim.
Any advice would be really appreciated.
Now that the bail and charges are being dropped. I've been told by SS that I need to protect my children and that they must not have unsupervised contact. I know as soon as he finds out he will be home (not been allowed home or with the children unsupervised all of this time). I don't want him home as this would put the children on the child protection register.
Our house is in both our names. Is there anything I can do to stop him walking back in as if nothing has happened? The trust has completely gone due to all of the lies he has told and he has no remorse but is behaving like the victim.
Any advice would be really appreciated.
Finding it really difficult to start legal proceedings as never wanted to be divorced. In making those steps it all seems so final and desperately sad. I have realised that I will never trust him again, which I know is not a way to have a relationship.
It does feel like I've lost all the legal back up now that it is not going to court. Struggling with how we end up dealing with everything and scared of the financial burden of it all.
It does feel like I've lost all the legal back up now that it is not going to court. Struggling with how we end up dealing with everything and scared of the financial burden of it all.
Hi Sparkle
sorry you are having to deal with this. I think starting divorce proceedings may be the only way. I don’t know what his bail restrictions were, but SS don’t have any legal power to stop your husband having contact with the children anyway - when you read on this forum that they say partners can it be alone with their children then that is all voluntary as there is no legal basis for them to be able to this - only a judge has this power.
i don’t know how reasonable your partner is but is there any chance that you could discuss this with him ? You could point out that if you are not seen as protective the the children will probably have a CP plan and you will both have actions to complete and be monitored with SS visits every 10 days. is this something that might work ?
good luck x
sorry you are having to deal with this. I think starting divorce proceedings may be the only way. I don’t know what his bail restrictions were, but SS don’t have any legal power to stop your husband having contact with the children anyway - when you read on this forum that they say partners can it be alone with their children then that is all voluntary as there is no legal basis for them to be able to this - only a judge has this power.
i don’t know how reasonable your partner is but is there any chance that you could discuss this with him ? You could point out that if you are not seen as protective the the children will probably have a CP plan and you will both have actions to complete and be monitored with SS visits every 10 days. is this something that might work ?
good luck x
Thank you for your replies. I'm going to see a solicitor on Monday to get some more advice. One of the bail conditions was to not be unsupervised with any child. This is something that SS want to advice to continue. I guess I also need to wait for the CIN meeting to ask specific questions regarding how they see that I can be protective.
That being said I can't see him changing and me suddenly wanting him home. Does anyone have any experience of being allowed to keep the house/getting an order where the children must be supervised. Really don't have a clue how any of this works.
That being said I can't see him changing and me suddenly wanting him home. Does anyone have any experience of being allowed to keep the house/getting an order where the children must be supervised. Really don't have a clue how any of this works.
I feel for you Sparkle,
My ex partner's conditional bail is due to end this month. Despite, initially being heartbroken and struggling with the no contact part, now, my children and I couldn't be happier. I have no idea if he will be charged, bail extended with same conditions or what?. However, my and my children's lives have moved on for the better.
This may sound incredibly harsh but I can see how having him in our lives was a negative. I am scared that once his bail is up, he will contact us again. Our circumstances are slightly different as he is not the children's father and we have no financial ties.
Xx
My ex partner's conditional bail is due to end this month. Despite, initially being heartbroken and struggling with the no contact part, now, my children and I couldn't be happier. I have no idea if he will be charged, bail extended with same conditions or what?. However, my and my children's lives have moved on for the better.
This may sound incredibly harsh but I can see how having him in our lives was a negative. I am scared that once his bail is up, he will contact us again. Our circumstances are slightly different as he is not the children's father and we have no financial ties.
Xx