Mistake
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As someone who has just created a post using this word, I am offended to be honest.
The definition of the word mistake in the dictionary is "A misconception of the meaning of something, a thing incorrectly done or thought, an error of judgement".
I believe my person made a mistake because I believe he will never make this decision again. I also believe that if he had realised the consequences of his momentary lapse in judgement, he would never of done what he did.
There is a lot of psychology behind why our people carry out the offences they have. It's no excuse and some people do not make mistakes in these circumstances and truly mean to cause harm for their own pleasure.
There are small mistakes, such as your example used in your post and there are big mistakes such as the ones carried out by our people but I do believe both can be described as mistakes.
The definition of the word mistake in the dictionary is "A misconception of the meaning of something, a thing incorrectly done or thought, an error of judgement".
I believe my person made a mistake because I believe he will never make this decision again. I also believe that if he had realised the consequences of his momentary lapse in judgement, he would never of done what he did.
There is a lot of psychology behind why our people carry out the offences they have. It's no excuse and some people do not make mistakes in these circumstances and truly mean to cause harm for their own pleasure.
There are small mistakes, such as your example used in your post and there are big mistakes such as the ones carried out by our people but I do believe both can be described as mistakes.
Post deleted by user
Disagree 100%.... that's all I'm going to say.....
I also disagree with the original poster. Without going into our story I know for a fact my husband made an unintentional MISTAKE and I know he will never make that MISTAKE again.
Apologies to those offended.
This might the be a cultural/language thing. In my native language, mistake couldn't be used in a context of where someone else is hurt/crime offended. Eg. Saying 'it was a mistake to hit you' 'it was a mistake to steal a car/murder/shoplift'. It would very much seem like you didn't take responsibility for your actions but the thing just happened with no real input or fault of yourself.
But I stand corrected in English.
Edit. I'll take this post down soon so I don't offend more people. Just wanted to apologise again to those I have offended!
This might the be a cultural/language thing. In my native language, mistake couldn't be used in a context of where someone else is hurt/crime offended. Eg. Saying 'it was a mistake to hit you' 'it was a mistake to steal a car/murder/shoplift'. It would very much seem like you didn't take responsibility for your actions but the thing just happened with no real input or fault of yourself.
But I stand corrected in English.
Edit. I'll take this post down soon so I don't offend more people. Just wanted to apologise again to those I have offended!
Thank you, HoplessScared, for your reflections and interest in this topic. We appreciate your thread and the conversation it has sparked. We wanted to contribute to this discussion, as some forum users have expressed personal opinions on the use of the term 'mistake' in the context of online sexual offenses against children. While we value everyone's perspectives, we want to ensure this space remains a safe and supportive place for all users.
The language we use can be highly impactful, and it is important to be mindful of this when discussing difficult and emotive topics. Language is complex and evolving, leaving much room for interpretation and discussion. We cannot always be certain of everyone's understanding of various terms and phrases, which can lead to differing perceptions of their meanings and intended use. Whether you or another individual labels the behavior as a mistake or something else, what is crucial is that the behavior is not repeated, and the individual seeks support to ensure it never happens again.
We acknowledge that this topic may be difficult for some users to view and engage with. However, we value respectful and diverse viewpoints, as they can contribute to further education and understanding. Each individual's experience and perspective are unique, and every situation is different.
Thank you for your contributions to this important discussion.
The Forum Team
The language we use can be highly impactful, and it is important to be mindful of this when discussing difficult and emotive topics. Language is complex and evolving, leaving much room for interpretation and discussion. We cannot always be certain of everyone's understanding of various terms and phrases, which can lead to differing perceptions of their meanings and intended use. Whether you or another individual labels the behavior as a mistake or something else, what is crucial is that the behavior is not repeated, and the individual seeks support to ensure it never happens again.
We acknowledge that this topic may be difficult for some users to view and engage with. However, we value respectful and diverse viewpoints, as they can contribute to further education and understanding. Each individual's experience and perspective are unique, and every situation is different.
Thank you for your contributions to this important discussion.
The Forum Team
I agree with the OP regarding how the word 'mistake' CAN come across as minimising. I don't think people intend it that way, but I very much see the issue she's raising and think she's brave to raise it. My own 'OH' is claiming his investigation for IIOC is based on a one off 'mistake'. Do I believe him? Not particularly till I see the forensics TBH, including the independent forensics he intends to pay for himself. Lets face it, the temptation to at least minimise must be ferociously strong for men under investigation.
My ex said he made a "mistake ". Massive minimising and an attempt to make me believe that his offending was a one off or a momentary lapse!!!! No way
This whole area of justifying behaviour is a minefield.
Yes we hope that the offender did not intend to hurt anyone,it was a 'mistake' at a difficult time. But there are victims and they must acknowledge that fully to deter them from repeating their actions.
Sometimes it is easier to just admit guilt without fully understanding what has to change.
I am terrified my son does not acknowledge the impact of the crime on victims. He just thinks he can move away with a new job & just start again. Totally alone.
Our only glimmer of hope is Circles to expand his sociability.
Yes we hope that the offender did not intend to hurt anyone,it was a 'mistake' at a difficult time. But there are victims and they must acknowledge that fully to deter them from repeating their actions.
Sometimes it is easier to just admit guilt without fully understanding what has to change.
I am terrified my son does not acknowledge the impact of the crime on victims. He just thinks he can move away with a new job & just start again. Totally alone.
Our only glimmer of hope is Circles to expand his sociability.