update - 14 months since the knock
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Hi all
Thought id share an update. We are at 14 months on since the awful knock.
We've just had another CIN meeting for our unborn baby - case was closed for my 13 year old, they wanted to keep it open for the unborn but I argued after 5 misscarriges I really didnt need them on my back and could they just back off until im further along, which they did, until i reached approx 20 weeks.
I left the cin meeting mid way through I got very emotional, was accused of supporting the partner. and then in the next sentance was asked if I'd be willing to move in with my in laws for them to help support with Baby - this would mean living with the babys father aka the accused!
Im not taking this seriously, as it was mentioned in the last cin meeting that 3 people could be on maternity ward with me to supervise him with the baby, and I simply asked if there was any others, do they have to be named. The safeguarding widwife then took that that I would leave my new born with just anyone to get a visit from the partner. I explained that I struggled to understand what they are seeing in their mind, as baby would not leave my side, it would just be another body beside my bed. Her argument was when she had her child, she was restrictive to who visited her. I argued that after 5 misscarridges and being told id never conceive Id like to think id have a flock of family and friends at my bedside during recovery, but im not taking this seriousy.
I unfortuantly developed gestational diabetes (GD) with the pregnncy which has added on further complications, medical team wanting to induce and I am at further risk of hving a C section.
We are wating for another section 47 to be completed and then the Risk assessment following that will confirm if partner is allowed in the marital home when there is another adult in the home to ensure babys safety. But following todays meting, this is not looking good.
Ive also had my first born's Dad move back in to the home to help suppoprt at SS request (now i remember why we split) - ive done all thats been asked of me and more and they are just draggin their feet.
I dread the birth and coming home as thats just the time that I'll be alone with my 13 yeear old boy who is autistic and a new born all whilst possiby recoving from a cesarian.
Im banging my head against a walll. The last cin was completed over a month ago, and then social worker announced they were leaving and questiond who it was who was completing the risk assessment - certainly not me!
We're now waiting again
My last words on the cin was I see why relationships dont last, and i feel like they are just pushing me to end the relationship, i then broke down in tears and resorted to my bedroom. During my crying fit and struggling to breathe from screaming in rage I had adoption cross my mind, which I feel awful for, but its just giving into them. and Im determined to fight for this for the ske o my child who is now at risk of meeting them once at birth and then no contact for however long they deem nessesary
Myself and partner have discussed at length, he has signed up total of 3 therapies at priate cost to him 2 of them are complete, we speak daily obviously and we do discuss his emotions, thoughts and feelings and I have said to him should it result in court (which ive been told it will) and I hear anything I was not made aware of by him, then we are done and he respects that and it wasnt oh in the case id better tell you about this or that. The SW response to this was oh in my experiece you will always hear something you were not aware of.
Bail is extended once again to October and we have benn advised it will more than likely be extended once again after this.
Any thoughts/opinions for this
1k images found, all categories (unfortuantly) last update we got was it was going to a judge or someone to deem if police are to continue searching or take to court what they have.
Thought id share an update. We are at 14 months on since the awful knock.
We've just had another CIN meeting for our unborn baby - case was closed for my 13 year old, they wanted to keep it open for the unborn but I argued after 5 misscarriges I really didnt need them on my back and could they just back off until im further along, which they did, until i reached approx 20 weeks.
I left the cin meeting mid way through I got very emotional, was accused of supporting the partner. and then in the next sentance was asked if I'd be willing to move in with my in laws for them to help support with Baby - this would mean living with the babys father aka the accused!
Im not taking this seriously, as it was mentioned in the last cin meeting that 3 people could be on maternity ward with me to supervise him with the baby, and I simply asked if there was any others, do they have to be named. The safeguarding widwife then took that that I would leave my new born with just anyone to get a visit from the partner. I explained that I struggled to understand what they are seeing in their mind, as baby would not leave my side, it would just be another body beside my bed. Her argument was when she had her child, she was restrictive to who visited her. I argued that after 5 misscarridges and being told id never conceive Id like to think id have a flock of family and friends at my bedside during recovery, but im not taking this seriousy.
I unfortuantly developed gestational diabetes (GD) with the pregnncy which has added on further complications, medical team wanting to induce and I am at further risk of hving a C section.
We are wating for another section 47 to be completed and then the Risk assessment following that will confirm if partner is allowed in the marital home when there is another adult in the home to ensure babys safety. But following todays meting, this is not looking good.
Ive also had my first born's Dad move back in to the home to help suppoprt at SS request (now i remember why we split) - ive done all thats been asked of me and more and they are just draggin their feet.
I dread the birth and coming home as thats just the time that I'll be alone with my 13 yeear old boy who is autistic and a new born all whilst possiby recoving from a cesarian.
Im banging my head against a walll. The last cin was completed over a month ago, and then social worker announced they were leaving and questiond who it was who was completing the risk assessment - certainly not me!
We're now waiting again
My last words on the cin was I see why relationships dont last, and i feel like they are just pushing me to end the relationship, i then broke down in tears and resorted to my bedroom. During my crying fit and struggling to breathe from screaming in rage I had adoption cross my mind, which I feel awful for, but its just giving into them. and Im determined to fight for this for the ske o my child who is now at risk of meeting them once at birth and then no contact for however long they deem nessesary
Myself and partner have discussed at length, he has signed up total of 3 therapies at priate cost to him 2 of them are complete, we speak daily obviously and we do discuss his emotions, thoughts and feelings and I have said to him should it result in court (which ive been told it will) and I hear anything I was not made aware of by him, then we are done and he respects that and it wasnt oh in the case id better tell you about this or that. The SW response to this was oh in my experiece you will always hear something you were not aware of.
Bail is extended once again to October and we have benn advised it will more than likely be extended once again after this.
Any thoughts/opinions for this
1k images found, all categories (unfortuantly) last update we got was it was going to a judge or someone to deem if police are to continue searching or take to court what they have.
Hi Amethyst, I'm so sorry you're going through all this stress and anxiety. I really don't have much advise to give you but I can share my sons story with you. His now ex wife was pregnant when he was arrested and gave birth whilst he was on RUI. He was allowed into the delivery room with third party supervision. His wife was not allowed to supervise. Once home he was allowed 3rd party supervised access to his baby in his ex wife's home. As part of his sentence he was given a 10 year SHPO which says no unsupervised access with under 18's unless agreed by SS. SS wouldn't agree it so he continues to have supervised access, which his ex wife is now able to provide, and the case is closed to SS.
My sons probation officer is now encouraging him to take it up again with SS and fight for unsupervised access which she will support him with.
I'm not sure that's been any help. We found SS to be really quite difficult to work with.
My sons probation officer is now encouraging him to take it up again with SS and fight for unsupervised access which she will support him with.
I'm not sure that's been any help. We found SS to be really quite difficult to work with.
Thank you for taking the time to reply :)