Family and Friends Forum

Hi. I'm hoping someone could point me in the direction of a counsellor - not for the OH, but for me. Besides the still-ongoing subject of his porn addiction leading to the knock, i'm now working with his extreme anxiety/depression, and that's wearing me down more than anything else. I'm the only one he can turn to, and that's a pretty heavy weight when he's so miserable and there are such big chunks of the story i can't talk to most people about. He doesn't leave the house. Has joy in pretty much nothing. Is just.... a shell. We have no love life. I'm essentially a carer-come-comfort-blanket, and he says he loves me, but its not what it was.

I want him to get better - he's on anti-depressants now, after he finally gave in and went to the doctor - but i'm finding it harder. I wake up grouchy that i'm going to work while he mopes, and i come home worrying about what degree of depression he'll be under today. He was always a bit anxious/low confidnce, but the Knock has killed him. Are Relate any good? I'm worried they would react badly to The Knock and be biased. Not sure where to go but i'm frightned of burning out completely.

Thanks. I feel like I need to get away from all this for a while but don't want to rush into anything hasty. Hoping a counsellor will help. Got up for work this morning and just cried. I've been strong for us since The Knock (9 march) but that's run out of steam and all I can think of is how bad everything is and how it once was. I think I'm hitting burnout but it's out of my hands so all I can do us muddle by. Last week I felt ok, this week I'm broken.

I'll give that a go. I'm in work right now, but might try and take the afternoon off to speak to someone. Yesterday I was fully ready to pack up and leave; today I'm not so sure why I was so certain that was the best thing. My head's all over the place; he knows it too and it's not helping either of us.