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SadAndWorried

Member since
October 2019

155 posts

I'm so fed up with my lack of social life. During the investigation I completely withdrew from any socialising due to fear that one day people would find out. That was from Jan 2021- Feb 2024. He was sentenced in Feb 2024, didn't go into the media thankfully so I don't have to hide anymore but I'm basically under house arrest because he can't be unsupervised with the children and it's really dragging me down! Then it's things like I'm an early riser I used to love!!! taking my dog out for a good 1-2 hour walk before anyone even woke up but I can't! I can't just go to the shops to get milk because I would have to drag the kids with me! I can't just go for a walk! It's suffocating!

Posted Sat July 20, 2024 11:58pm
Edited Sun July 21, 2024 12:28amReport post

Webb89

Member since
July 2022

527 posts

Is your OH living with you? Is there anyone else that can supervise? So they can stay over while you go for your long early day walk?



I am so sorry you are feeling like this. I cannot think of another crime that impacts so much on the innocent family. Sending you hugs

Posted Sun July 21, 2024 10:58amReport post

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2502 posts

Sad x

I cannot imagine how difficult it is having children at home and not been able to do such small things due to having to be the person who has the responsibility of supervising every moment of the day,

As Webb mentioned do you have someone who can look after the children so you can have some you time, even just getting out for a long walk,

It's so difficult, hugs sent xx

Posted Sun July 21, 2024 11:18amReport post

FelicityWish

Member since
January 2024

27 posts

I am in the same situation, it feels like lockdown all over again. I have no one to stay/supervise at home, I find it so draining and suffocating, I don't want to be with their dad all the time I want a break away from them/him but he only gets to see them when I supervise, he is allowed to take them out in the community for short periods but this can only happen Sundays due to our schedules. Feel for you and here if you need to chat or vent xx

Posted Sun July 21, 2024 4:16pmReport post

EA

Member since
August 2022

129 posts

I have another 9 months and I stupidly believed it would be over and I could have some normalcy but I'm starting to realise I'll never get to leave them with him again.



Can I ask what your charges / outcomes were?

Posted Sun July 21, 2024 5:02pmReport post

Ocean

Member since
September 2023

965 posts

That must be so hard for you and i imagine leaves you feeling quite claustrophobic.

My husband and I do all the supervision for my son and his children. We have the children each weekend, one day in the week and some of the school holidays. My son has restrictions of no unsupervised contact in his SHPO so we are careful to ensure there is always someone available to supervise and have a few people we can also call on in an emergency. Can you find other people to share the responsibility with to give you a break?

Posted Sun July 21, 2024 6:35pmReport post

Hycinth

Member since
October 2023

93 posts

Hi



I just wanted to say I feel for you, it must make you feel so trapped. I've felt the same from time to time but my OH doesn't live with us but he does work from our house. My child is at least a teen so I can leave him at home by himself. I've been struggling with putting in boundaries as my OH really struggles when I say he can't come over. There have been times when I just wanted to pop out to the shops but couldn't. Juggling where everyone is is quite exhausting. I'm sure you also need your walks to keep yourself sane. I hope you find a way to have them.

Posted Sun July 21, 2024 7:14pmReport post

SoTired

Member since
March 2021

413 posts

Hi,

What are the clauses in his shpo? I originally lived like this and then contacted SS to have the FSP potentially amended. It meant we needed to have another assessment but my children are now allowed to be left unsupervised with a very tight plan around them.



Like you, I couldn't even nip to the shop. In fact one of the original stipulations was that I was not allowed to sleep deeply.

Posted Sun July 21, 2024 8:31pm
Edited Sun July 21, 2024 8:32pmReport post

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