School holiday survival - hive mind
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Good morning! This is my first post.
I'm several weeks 'post-knock' and mentally things are starting to calm down
My children are safe and stable, we've found a rhythm that's working for us during 'normal' life, and I'm laying down strong boundaries. However, school holidays are now here which throws everything up in the air.
I'm signed off work - high pressure professional role, but my concentration is shot, I'm currently unable to tolerate being around men eg in shops, let alone work alongside them or against them in professional capacity. Also I need so much downtime to get through the day, though that's slowly improving
The kids are point blank refusing most of the holiday club bookings I'd made 'in the before times', and I completely understand them wanting to be home with me much of the time. I do have some play date swaps lined up, but I always end up hosting (we were the well off family with the big house so it was easiest!).
I'll be grateful for any school holiday survival tips. Kids are tweens, tendency towards too much screen time, I'd love to get them up and about without too much pressure or expenditure (cinema trip yesterday came in at £100 once I'd paid for parking!).
I'm several weeks 'post-knock' and mentally things are starting to calm down
My children are safe and stable, we've found a rhythm that's working for us during 'normal' life, and I'm laying down strong boundaries. However, school holidays are now here which throws everything up in the air.
I'm signed off work - high pressure professional role, but my concentration is shot, I'm currently unable to tolerate being around men eg in shops, let alone work alongside them or against them in professional capacity. Also I need so much downtime to get through the day, though that's slowly improving
The kids are point blank refusing most of the holiday club bookings I'd made 'in the before times', and I completely understand them wanting to be home with me much of the time. I do have some play date swaps lined up, but I always end up hosting (we were the well off family with the big house so it was easiest!).
I'll be grateful for any school holiday survival tips. Kids are tweens, tendency towards too much screen time, I'd love to get them up and about without too much pressure or expenditure (cinema trip yesterday came in at £100 once I'd paid for parking!).
Hi,
try looking for large outdoor spaces locally and make a day of it with a picnic. If the weather is good then anywhere with splash pads is good as the hot weather can push even the most "grown up" tween to embrace their inner child.
Sometimes it's easier to get them out if you meet up with friends or family with kids too.
Explain to them that you need some time for yourself too so they need to go to a holiday club for one week and if they're at different ones then it needs to align so you get alone time. Don't overstretch yourself during that week or feel the pressure to catch up on jobs etc.
Be patient with yourself and them. Allow for a couple of days of no activities xxx
try looking for large outdoor spaces locally and make a day of it with a picnic. If the weather is good then anywhere with splash pads is good as the hot weather can push even the most "grown up" tween to embrace their inner child.
Sometimes it's easier to get them out if you meet up with friends or family with kids too.
Explain to them that you need some time for yourself too so they need to go to a holiday club for one week and if they're at different ones then it needs to align so you get alone time. Don't overstretch yourself during that week or feel the pressure to catch up on jobs etc.
Be patient with yourself and them. Allow for a couple of days of no activities xxx
hi there, expectations really do wear us down especially if you've always been the host people.expect it just remember your allowed to say no!!!!
beach days are always good fun regardless of age take a disposable bbq and have fun thre get the fresh air also ..just remember this is your journey make sure your mind is working for you it's such a horrible situation but I find beach days are a winner especially for the mind xx
beach days are always good fun regardless of age take a disposable bbq and have fun thre get the fresh air also ..just remember this is your journey make sure your mind is working for you it's such a horrible situation but I find beach days are a winner especially for the mind xx
Thanks both - not figured out how to be able to see your usernames while writing a reply, so I'm sorry I haven't name checked you!
This was meant to be the summer of our first foreign holiday but that's been scrapped so I'm keen to give the kids some joy.
However I've always been terrible for martyring myself for their happiness, to the point of absolute burnout, and I really want to avoid that happening now it's just the 3 of us (most of the time) and we've got a long and painful journey ahead of us.
I need to pace myself and self-regulate better, and show them the power of gentle pottering. Oooh just remembered we have a tent ( not waterproof) that we can put up in the garden and play at camping.
This was meant to be the summer of our first foreign holiday but that's been scrapped so I'm keen to give the kids some joy.
However I've always been terrible for martyring myself for their happiness, to the point of absolute burnout, and I really want to avoid that happening now it's just the 3 of us (most of the time) and we've got a long and painful journey ahead of us.
I need to pace myself and self-regulate better, and show them the power of gentle pottering. Oooh just remembered we have a tent ( not waterproof) that we can put up in the garden and play at camping.
Hi I'm in a similar situation with the first long school holidays as a solo parent! I've really had to adjust my expectations daily and really use far too much screen time as a babysitter as I have a disability needing regular stops and rests in the day. But have to think short term it won't harm them.
I've scouted local pages for free activities over the holidays, and freebies sites for people giving away toys/games to keep them busy.
I've got indoor picnics and movies (charity shops usually have dvds for 50p so I make them choose plus sugar treats).
We regularly do an hour at the park which is again free! We recently did the 30days wild challenge (download for ideas) which entertained them too. Including camping in our backfarden and marshmallows in our firefit.
Check out 5 minute mum too.
Playdates at your home can be great but maybe be strict on shorter visits to avoid burn out. And just ask for others to have your children for a couple hours if possible, ice found people are so willing to help but rubbish at offering.
I've had to be really strict with money as previously I'd be doing expensive day trips 2 days a week and smaller activities which soon add up! Most kids just enjoy the time with you even if it's quiet colouring pages. Good luck x
I've scouted local pages for free activities over the holidays, and freebies sites for people giving away toys/games to keep them busy.
I've got indoor picnics and movies (charity shops usually have dvds for 50p so I make them choose plus sugar treats).
We regularly do an hour at the park which is again free! We recently did the 30days wild challenge (download for ideas) which entertained them too. Including camping in our backfarden and marshmallows in our firefit.
Check out 5 minute mum too.
Playdates at your home can be great but maybe be strict on shorter visits to avoid burn out. And just ask for others to have your children for a couple hours if possible, ice found people are so willing to help but rubbish at offering.
I've had to be really strict with money as previously I'd be doing expensive day trips 2 days a week and smaller activities which soon add up! Most kids just enjoy the time with you even if it's quiet colouring pages. Good luck x
Thanks Bondi. I'm sorry you're in the same situation , plus health issues which must make it even harder.
I must confess I'm the kind of mum who loves treats, trips out and snuggly sofa time with my kids as I'm normally working so hard during the week I feel it's 'earned' by us all. Now I'm signed off, and my kids need me SO MUCH, I'm having to find the grit to get through the 'everyday', not just being fun frivolous mum. Plus even when I go back to work, we'll be down to 1 salary ( mine) some point in the next 2 years, possibly for the foreseeable. I need to get the knack of parenting without throwing money at it
I must confess I'm the kind of mum who loves treats, trips out and snuggly sofa time with my kids as I'm normally working so hard during the week I feel it's 'earned' by us all. Now I'm signed off, and my kids need me SO MUCH, I'm having to find the grit to get through the 'everyday', not just being fun frivolous mum. Plus even when I go back to work, we'll be down to 1 salary ( mine) some point in the next 2 years, possibly for the foreseeable. I need to get the knack of parenting without throwing money at it
Have a look on your local council website for ideas of free or cheap days out for the children. Our local council are good at keeping it up to date. Also make use of the kids eat for a £1.00 deals and have some lunch dates.
If you live near the beach you could invest in a paddle board for less than £200 and have hours of fun in the sea.
Do you have any theme parks near to you with season tickets. We purchased them last year in our local area and it meant we could visit all summer.
We have a scheme where I live in some of our woodland areas where you download a map for free before going to the area and using the clues on the map to follow the trail.
If you live near the beach you could invest in a paddle board for less than £200 and have hours of fun in the sea.
Do you have any theme parks near to you with season tickets. We purchased them last year in our local area and it meant we could visit all summer.
We have a scheme where I live in some of our woodland areas where you download a map for free before going to the area and using the clues on the map to follow the trail.
camp in the garden with them it will be fun have a little fire with marshmallows and have movie in the text just run a cable if u know its not going to rain ..but yeah explore walks and beaches xxx