Upcoming trial worries, nearly 4yrs of hell.
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In December 2020, my husband was arrested at our home and his devices seized. There was intelligence from abroad that ‘he’ was sending pictures of school children undressing. (He was a teacher at the time of arrest)
Following this, he was obviously suspended from his job but with full pay.
We went on to welcome twin girls in sep 2021, unbeknown to us that SS were then made aware and involved. So from birth our girls went onto a child protection plan. We remain on this plan now (July 2024).
The current plan involves, him to not live at home, no bathing, no changing nappies ect, no unsupervised contact, we’ve had 3 family members assessed so they have to be the ones who supervise the contact, I am not allowed to because I stayed with my husband and trust him, however I’ve also explained countless amounts of times that I would never ever allow anything to happen to my children.
Since then the NCA have been investigating him and in sept 2022 they decided to charge him with ‘attempting to make indecent images’ no evidence of any photos/videos have ever been found on the multiple devices that were seized and now the evidence they have is nothing to do with that original arrest and charges made have no relevance to what he was arrested for in 2020 (someone abroad saying about images being sent of children), they say that when he’s visited porn sites - between 2016-19, there are links that state indecent wording but also have no evidence he’s even watched these links.
Still quite sure he’s only been under all this scrutiny because he ‘was’ a teacher at that original time of arrest.
Now I’m fed up of being called ‘in denial’ by SS as to be quite frank, there isn’t a doubt in my mind that my husband would ever watch with intent anything indecent regarding children. We met in high school and dated for 3yrs and then mutually decided to split for him to go to uni far away. We then reunited 5years later in 2013, been together this time round for nearly 11yrs now and been married since 2019 and obviously even after this original arrest we chose to have a child, obviously never imagining anything would go on for this long.
On child protection still as SS doesn’t feel a relevant assessment can take place until the outcome of trial has been confirmed. (Been told by a few social workers that they themselves have never known a child protection plan to last this long)
Trial is due to go ahead end of July (less that a fortnight away) although it needs to happen and we want it over, we are so worried about the outcome. On so many levels I’m confident a jury will see it the same way as us, that watching ‘normal’ porn isn’t a crime, and that even if he had ever come across anything indecent he would have clicked away from it.
He’s been for reviews at the court over the last 1.5years a few times and multiple times the barristers and judges have all questioned the wording of the charge ‘attempting to make indecent images’. The NCA have always seemed to be allowed more time to ‘clear things up’.
Has anyone ever come across charges like this? If so what has been the outcome?
If, god forbid they find him guilty somehow, will he be allowed to return home?
SS said an outsider assessment would take place but we are terrified, that we won’t ever be able to have normal family life together. My children are nearly 3 and luckily they don’t have a clue really at the moment but they’re becoming so clever and notice so many little things now and when they wake in the night asking for daddy it is becoming harder and harder to say where he is.
Would he have to be in the SOR for this, if found guilty?
Following this, he was obviously suspended from his job but with full pay.
We went on to welcome twin girls in sep 2021, unbeknown to us that SS were then made aware and involved. So from birth our girls went onto a child protection plan. We remain on this plan now (July 2024).
The current plan involves, him to not live at home, no bathing, no changing nappies ect, no unsupervised contact, we’ve had 3 family members assessed so they have to be the ones who supervise the contact, I am not allowed to because I stayed with my husband and trust him, however I’ve also explained countless amounts of times that I would never ever allow anything to happen to my children.
Since then the NCA have been investigating him and in sept 2022 they decided to charge him with ‘attempting to make indecent images’ no evidence of any photos/videos have ever been found on the multiple devices that were seized and now the evidence they have is nothing to do with that original arrest and charges made have no relevance to what he was arrested for in 2020 (someone abroad saying about images being sent of children), they say that when he’s visited porn sites - between 2016-19, there are links that state indecent wording but also have no evidence he’s even watched these links.
Still quite sure he’s only been under all this scrutiny because he ‘was’ a teacher at that original time of arrest.
Now I’m fed up of being called ‘in denial’ by SS as to be quite frank, there isn’t a doubt in my mind that my husband would ever watch with intent anything indecent regarding children. We met in high school and dated for 3yrs and then mutually decided to split for him to go to uni far away. We then reunited 5years later in 2013, been together this time round for nearly 11yrs now and been married since 2019 and obviously even after this original arrest we chose to have a child, obviously never imagining anything would go on for this long.
On child protection still as SS doesn’t feel a relevant assessment can take place until the outcome of trial has been confirmed. (Been told by a few social workers that they themselves have never known a child protection plan to last this long)
Trial is due to go ahead end of July (less that a fortnight away) although it needs to happen and we want it over, we are so worried about the outcome. On so many levels I’m confident a jury will see it the same way as us, that watching ‘normal’ porn isn’t a crime, and that even if he had ever come across anything indecent he would have clicked away from it.
He’s been for reviews at the court over the last 1.5years a few times and multiple times the barristers and judges have all questioned the wording of the charge ‘attempting to make indecent images’. The NCA have always seemed to be allowed more time to ‘clear things up’.
Has anyone ever come across charges like this? If so what has been the outcome?
If, god forbid they find him guilty somehow, will he be allowed to return home?
SS said an outsider assessment would take place but we are terrified, that we won’t ever be able to have normal family life together. My children are nearly 3 and luckily they don’t have a clue really at the moment but they’re becoming so clever and notice so many little things now and when they wake in the night asking for daddy it is becoming harder and harder to say where he is.
Would he have to be in the SOR for this, if found guilty?
I'm so sorry you're in this scenario. I don't have any advice but if you contact the LFF helpline they maybe able to give guidance based on experience.
Unfortunately my understanding from others scenarios in the forum is that if you have anything in your devices or there is evidence that you did have something (even if you didn't ask for it or click it or know it was there) it's still classed as making an image because it's saved on your device and you could in theory look at it or pass it on. Your person needs to be able to prove they didn't know about it and would have reported had they seen it. It's only their word as there's no way to prove you have seen/didn't know about or didn't go looking for it. Its more favourable if you report and delete; but how do you do that if you don't know it's there?
Social services in my case don't seem to take into account how long you've known the person or how honest their previous character, or that it was the result/consequence that stemmed from legal porn, if they've got that type of content on their devices they are automatically a risk to ANY child, even their own purely because they have access to their own children. And I see their point, because offenders do start online, then escalate to real contact. With children it's not worth risking their safety, they always take the most over-protective route because it ensures the kids are not at even the tiniest risk.
Its a massive loophole/gap in the law because if you don't know about it how can you report it or delete it? Theres no way to tell which people go on from online offences to real life contact. It's not something researched, not much statistics available or that people know about due to the taboo. What is also sad is that almost half those caught with images etc have children of their own; it's scary how prevalent it is.
Unfortunately the best way to avoid it is to assume that no online porn is safe; they don't have the moderation/standards and enough regulation. I very much doubt it has reporting or blocking tools (or that they're adequate) and people aren't accountable for what they put on or view (I don't think it comes with a warning like the labels on cigarettes) even if it did just think how many user agreements etc you've skimmed when downloading an app or "I agree" boxes you've checked without reading the full thing.
I wish you luck and hope you get all the support you need and get to a place where you have the answers you need so you can try move forward. The stick in limbo part is torture.
Unfortunately my understanding from others scenarios in the forum is that if you have anything in your devices or there is evidence that you did have something (even if you didn't ask for it or click it or know it was there) it's still classed as making an image because it's saved on your device and you could in theory look at it or pass it on. Your person needs to be able to prove they didn't know about it and would have reported had they seen it. It's only their word as there's no way to prove you have seen/didn't know about or didn't go looking for it. Its more favourable if you report and delete; but how do you do that if you don't know it's there?
Social services in my case don't seem to take into account how long you've known the person or how honest their previous character, or that it was the result/consequence that stemmed from legal porn, if they've got that type of content on their devices they are automatically a risk to ANY child, even their own purely because they have access to their own children. And I see their point, because offenders do start online, then escalate to real contact. With children it's not worth risking their safety, they always take the most over-protective route because it ensures the kids are not at even the tiniest risk.
Its a massive loophole/gap in the law because if you don't know about it how can you report it or delete it? Theres no way to tell which people go on from online offences to real life contact. It's not something researched, not much statistics available or that people know about due to the taboo. What is also sad is that almost half those caught with images etc have children of their own; it's scary how prevalent it is.
Unfortunately the best way to avoid it is to assume that no online porn is safe; they don't have the moderation/standards and enough regulation. I very much doubt it has reporting or blocking tools (or that they're adequate) and people aren't accountable for what they put on or view (I don't think it comes with a warning like the labels on cigarettes) even if it did just think how many user agreements etc you've skimmed when downloading an app or "I agree" boxes you've checked without reading the full thing.
I wish you luck and hope you get all the support you need and get to a place where you have the answers you need so you can try move forward. The stick in limbo part is torture.