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Finding it hard today

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Tinkabella

Member since
June 2024

41 posts

Im not even sure where to start so going to use it more like a diary entry, i do appologise if this isnt allowed but i need to put it somewhere.



So here we are, the summer holidays have begun, my children all want to spend one on one time with my person, but their not allowed unsupervised ???? so feel like I can't even catch a break, can't even have 5 minutes to have a hot soak!



Ss's are still all over us, but our sw is leaving soon for maternity, she's confirmed that the file is now being prepared for cps. How long that will be ive no idea. As the phone has now been downloaded, and have until the 11th of September to do so!



Solicitors have also confirmed this, and still no clue at what we will be facing. Sw has told us to prepare for all eventualities, I'm guessing she knows more than she's letting on, as at our last meeting she briefly read the email oic sent and mentioned something about social media. Got to have some sort of assement where she will ask me questions such as what would I do if the children came to me and said my person had touched them etc. ( even though it's a communication offence ) and of course I would report straight away!



How do I prepare for the worst? Not sure how much more I can handle anymore.

Solicitors are saying on the phone a while back the police would have to use their imagination to know what was meant, if that's the case surely they would need more to press charges ( also the solicitors opnion on the phone)?



Worried as on his phone there was all sorts of family pictures, you know the funny ones of kids in the bath, or running round naked because they've stripped off etc. My heads spinning and hearts breaking.



I just needed to get it out there.

Posted Fri July 26, 2024 1:36pm
Edited Fri July 26, 2024 1:38pmReport post

LittleRobin3

Member since
April 2024

806 posts

Hi, you'll get through this because if I'm still here you can do it too.

Take everything the Police and SS's say with a large pinch of salt.

When the Police seized all our electronics, they took a family pc which we all used. All of my family photos were on it going back years and I hadn't backed them up. I lost them all because I wasn't allowed the equipment back unless I paid an outsourcing company £70 per hour to go through each and every piece of equipment and there were about 20! I lost all of it. Anyway, my point is I had photos on there of me and my three daughters baking a cake. My young son was also in the photo, totally naked stood on a stool at the kitchen worktop covered in flour. The Police mentioned it to me but said that it was all very innocent looking so they weren't bothered. I think, I assume, they are trained to spot photos that don't look right.



My ex's case went to the CPS about 10 weeks ago and we haven't heard anything since. This is the second time we're going through this. He was arrested 29 months ago.



I hope you can get that long soak you so deserve. Much love to you. X

Posted Fri July 26, 2024 3:28pm
Edited Fri July 26, 2024 3:30pmReport post

Tinkabella

Member since
June 2024

41 posts

Oh my days lovely that sounds horrendous!

My heart breaks such precious memories have been stolen from you. I'm praying with all my might that I can get at least my pictures back, as they have some of my late grandfather with my little darlings, some of the last ever photos of him are on there, including the birth of my last baby, and lots of her firsts!



I'm trying to keep positive and trying to keep my head above water but I'm sinking quicker than I can swim at the moment.



Sending you some big gentle hugs lovely I don't think I would manage a wait so long!

Posted Fri July 26, 2024 5:04pmReport post

AnxiousGirl

Member since
December 2023

282 posts

Police took my laptop which had 100s of photo my kids going back to when they were babies. I got it back and my son has taken them all off for me

They also took.my DSLR and memory cards - but not the external hard drive which was in the same camera bag!! Always thought that was a bit strange

Posted Sat July 27, 2024 8:24pmReport post

Tinkabella

Member since
June 2024

41 posts

Anxiousgirl, see it's so strange the way they've delt with it all,



My person is answering bail today, and being reinterviewed, the police have finished with his phone ( no idea when we will get it back, but I'm desperate for the pictures my most pressured possessions )



His solicitor hasn't received any of the evidence as of yesterday when she rang, so I'm hoping he can get a copy today.... that way I know exactly what's been said.



All the police have managed to do is link the phone to the chat room site and the snap chat account to the phone so it sounds like there's definitely nothing on there, we'll bar the conversation with the decoy.



I'm praying for a reasonable outcome, and that it's all done rather quickly ????



Sorry for the late reply! But sending you all a massive virtual hug!

Posted Tue July 30, 2024 9:54amReport post

Tinkabella

Member since
June 2024

41 posts

Littlerobin,



If you don't mind who was the company you were going to use for an external report done?

Turns out he was messaging other women and sending explicit images and videos to them, so I want to know what was said to them too, for my own peace of mind.

Posted Tue July 30, 2024 9:57amReport post

Tinkabella

Member since
June 2024

41 posts

Naturalmystic ( love the name too! )



My hearts breaking for you! I wish I could help answer those questions.

There's no way you can ask your son to leave, maybe take a few days break? Have you got any support, or someone who can stay with him? Just so you can get away and get your thoughts together etc?



It's a massive roller coaster, full of emotions. I'm sending you some massive gentle virtual hugs xxxx

Posted Tue July 30, 2024 11:20amReport post

Tinkabella

Member since
June 2024

41 posts

How long do 2nd interviews normally last guys? I'm currently waiting to hear from my person, he had to be in for 10am and nothing, I'm going out of my mind with worry, anxiety etc ????????

Posted Tue July 30, 2024 11:23amReport post

Tinkabella

Member since
June 2024

41 posts

Sadly not positive rebailed for another 3 months as their making more enquiries.... and pulled up his conversations with the women he was speaking to behind my back.



But they think they are going to definitely be pressing charges ????



Well I guess that says it all really

Posted Tue July 30, 2024 12:10pmReport post

Tinkabella

Member since
June 2024

41 posts

Naturalmystic, I think they are pushing for charges.



And unfortunately they can't say if they will keep it out of the media either ????



They are trying to find the conversations they have had with the other women and trying to say well you are sexual with others..... his solicitor advised to have a no comment interview again so I honestly think they are going to really push a harsh punishment on him.

Posted Wed July 31, 2024 1:38pmReport post

Quick exit