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Hi Everyone
I am new to this forum and feel very stressed, anxious and exhausted (as well as every other feeling you can probably feel at this point)
I am going to give a brief overview and hope someone can help and not judge me as I am tierd of people judging me and treating me like I have done something wrong.
My ex got the knock last Jun 2023, he was taken for questioning, and we have been awaiting pending investigation since this point. However in the mean time I have had a baby who is now 5months old (she was my miracle, was told I would never ever get pregnant due to health issues).
Since she was born in Feb 24, he has has a 2nd knock and this was a dew weeks ago now at beginning of July. To say that they have had further evidence and he is now in further investigation due to reoffending whilst on bail. At this point this is when I decided we can no longer be together. I am tierd of the lies, and deciet that has been given to me and I am also still recovering from a horrendous birth in Feb and trying to bring up our LG.
Since Jun 24, SS have been involved, however there was a massive issues between them and police as police informed them when I was 12 weeks pregnant that I was having a baby and they didn't do anything with this information, until she was here and 3 months old.
His bail conditions where no contact with children under 18 unsupervised and no personal care etc.
Since 3 weeks ago he is no longer allowed to see our LG and is to allowed to be near her or be near any where she could be, he is also not allowed to be on any internet enabled devices and only allowed to us a dumbphone.
I have had nothing but stress from ss, they have put us on a cin. Which i have followed and worked towards with them since day 1, they keep threatening me to be put on a protection plan, however I have not done anything wrong and followed everything I have been told from day dot by police and Ss.
I see my health visitor every 2 weeks and she has to calm me down everytime she sees me due to the way I have been spoken to, or the fact they keep saying they are supporting me with things but they haven't done anything. No support groups, no interventions - nothing.
I am qualified in safeguarding as previously working in it for the last 12 years and have said that I see everyone as a risk towards my LG as noone is 100% trustworthy of being risk free. I have also said I am happy to do any course or anything they thing that would benefit me but again nothing has come of this. I just keep being told that I am moving to a different ss and they will support me when I'm with them. But no date or when.
My health visitor is the most helpful individual I see and said she feels I am doing an amazing job due to the situation.
Anyway I'm not sure what I want for writing this, maybe just to get it out my head. But thank you if you have got this far and I wouldn't wish this situation on anyone as I have never felt thus down about anything in my life and don't want to again.
I think just people that understand would be great. Thanks for reading and any advice, tips, support or chatter would be greatly appreciated. I don't really have a supportive family and I am relying on friends for help (I hate putting them out as they have their own families and stresses to deal with too.)
I am new to this forum and feel very stressed, anxious and exhausted (as well as every other feeling you can probably feel at this point)
I am going to give a brief overview and hope someone can help and not judge me as I am tierd of people judging me and treating me like I have done something wrong.
My ex got the knock last Jun 2023, he was taken for questioning, and we have been awaiting pending investigation since this point. However in the mean time I have had a baby who is now 5months old (she was my miracle, was told I would never ever get pregnant due to health issues).
Since she was born in Feb 24, he has has a 2nd knock and this was a dew weeks ago now at beginning of July. To say that they have had further evidence and he is now in further investigation due to reoffending whilst on bail. At this point this is when I decided we can no longer be together. I am tierd of the lies, and deciet that has been given to me and I am also still recovering from a horrendous birth in Feb and trying to bring up our LG.
Since Jun 24, SS have been involved, however there was a massive issues between them and police as police informed them when I was 12 weeks pregnant that I was having a baby and they didn't do anything with this information, until she was here and 3 months old.
His bail conditions where no contact with children under 18 unsupervised and no personal care etc.
Since 3 weeks ago he is no longer allowed to see our LG and is to allowed to be near her or be near any where she could be, he is also not allowed to be on any internet enabled devices and only allowed to us a dumbphone.
I have had nothing but stress from ss, they have put us on a cin. Which i have followed and worked towards with them since day 1, they keep threatening me to be put on a protection plan, however I have not done anything wrong and followed everything I have been told from day dot by police and Ss.
I see my health visitor every 2 weeks and she has to calm me down everytime she sees me due to the way I have been spoken to, or the fact they keep saying they are supporting me with things but they haven't done anything. No support groups, no interventions - nothing.
I am qualified in safeguarding as previously working in it for the last 12 years and have said that I see everyone as a risk towards my LG as noone is 100% trustworthy of being risk free. I have also said I am happy to do any course or anything they thing that would benefit me but again nothing has come of this. I just keep being told that I am moving to a different ss and they will support me when I'm with them. But no date or when.
My health visitor is the most helpful individual I see and said she feels I am doing an amazing job due to the situation.
Anyway I'm not sure what I want for writing this, maybe just to get it out my head. But thank you if you have got this far and I wouldn't wish this situation on anyone as I have never felt thus down about anything in my life and don't want to again.
I think just people that understand would be great. Thanks for reading and any advice, tips, support or chatter would be greatly appreciated. I don't really have a supportive family and I am relying on friends for help (I hate putting them out as they have their own families and stresses to deal with too.)
Hi,
are the restrictions around contact with your daughter placed by ss or police ? If you have a look on your local authority's child services page you should be able to find information on how they conduct their assessments and also the criteria for cin, cpp etc.
Once you've posted more on the forum you'll be able to use the private message function and I'm happy to chat on there. I'm four years post knock and was 12 weeks pregnant at the knock so I understand the feelings of being under such scrutiny despite doing nothing wrong. You are not alone xxx
are the restrictions around contact with your daughter placed by ss or police ? If you have a look on your local authority's child services page you should be able to find information on how they conduct their assessments and also the criteria for cin, cpp etc.
Once you've posted more on the forum you'll be able to use the private message function and I'm happy to chat on there. I'm four years post knock and was 12 weeks pregnant at the knock so I understand the feelings of being under such scrutiny despite doing nothing wrong. You are not alone xxx
Hi,
Thank you for for your response and helping me not feel alone.
The restrictions are from the police (bail) and soci have now added it to the CIN plan too.
I have felt so alone with having given birth end of Feb and thing escalating so much since then
My head feels like a rollercoaster most days and having to do things as distractions is hard when they just want to keep talking about the situation.
Thanks for your response I really appreciate it.
Thank you for for your response and helping me not feel alone.
The restrictions are from the police (bail) and soci have now added it to the CIN plan too.
I have felt so alone with having given birth end of Feb and thing escalating so much since then
My head feels like a rollercoaster most days and having to do things as distractions is hard when they just want to keep talking about the situation.
Thanks for your response I really appreciate it.