Missing my old life so much - advice sought
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I tried to post yesterday but it never got approved. I'm 8 weeks into this awful new life, all my hopes and plans for the future gone, with two previous children whose summer has been ruined, leaving aside the impact this will have on them as things progress.
I just miss my whole previous life. We have a huge group of friends with kids similar ages, but most don't know what's happened beyond 'marital issues', and we don't see them now.
I am (was) a long distance runner, I was looking forward to the future and the idea of growing old with my person. Now I'm just bereft - not just the betrayal and heartbreak, which is bad enough, but the bereavement on behalf of my children, the loss of my freedom, the loss of any future for me to look forward to (apart from supporting / seeing my beautiful children grow up).
The resentment is often unmanageable and I have to send my person away to his parents a couple of times a week. It's only going to get worse isn't it? When the charges come in.
We're both having separate therapy. Is couple's therapy likely to be worthwhile at this early stage, to ease the anger / resentment and improve communication? I don't know if our marriage is salvageable but for the kids' sake I'd like to be less angry with everything he does/says. Or should I wait until after charges / sentencing? Did anyone find it NOT beneficial?
I just miss my whole previous life. We have a huge group of friends with kids similar ages, but most don't know what's happened beyond 'marital issues', and we don't see them now.
I am (was) a long distance runner, I was looking forward to the future and the idea of growing old with my person. Now I'm just bereft - not just the betrayal and heartbreak, which is bad enough, but the bereavement on behalf of my children, the loss of my freedom, the loss of any future for me to look forward to (apart from supporting / seeing my beautiful children grow up).
The resentment is often unmanageable and I have to send my person away to his parents a couple of times a week. It's only going to get worse isn't it? When the charges come in.
We're both having separate therapy. Is couple's therapy likely to be worthwhile at this early stage, to ease the anger / resentment and improve communication? I don't know if our marriage is salvageable but for the kids' sake I'd like to be less angry with everything he does/says. Or should I wait until after charges / sentencing? Did anyone find it NOT beneficial?
Thank you mystic. God we're all going through it aren't we :( big hug xx