So Conflicted
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Hi,
So my person (son) had his devices removed April 2023.
Spring forward charged with a number of cat a - c (approximately 300 - 167 A). Cached images which he swears have come from many unsafe sites. He is 23 years old and had teh same pc for 10 years.
I am so conflicted. Most days I believe he didn't do this on purpose/that he didn't search for this stuff. I want to support him.
On another, when thoughts are racing, I have thoughts that if he did I just don't want to deal with him. I want him out of my home.
I am all he has so am in such a dilema.
sad/mad/confused.com
So my person (son) had his devices removed April 2023.
Spring forward charged with a number of cat a - c (approximately 300 - 167 A). Cached images which he swears have come from many unsafe sites. He is 23 years old and had teh same pc for 10 years.
I am so conflicted. Most days I believe he didn't do this on purpose/that he didn't search for this stuff. I want to support him.
On another, when thoughts are racing, I have thoughts that if he did I just don't want to deal with him. I want him out of my home.
I am all he has so am in such a dilema.
sad/mad/confused.com
Conflicted x
I am also here because of my sons actions x
It's so difficult as you say to know what to do but this is only a decision you can make x
Have you been able to have a conversation with him about his offending, is he seeking help and do you have support? Xx
I am also here because of my sons actions x
It's so difficult as you say to know what to do but this is only a decision you can make x
Have you been able to have a conversation with him about his offending, is he seeking help and do you have support? Xx
Hi upset mum,
Yes, since day dot my son has been 100% consistent.
He accepts that he's been a bloody idiot not keeping himself safe/too many platforms and boom here we are. BUT that he is not interested in children sexually.
I do believe him, 99% of me does.
He spent his life online from the age of 12/13, having severe social anxiety, very awkward in social situations, depression and (undiagnosed austism). This is partly my fault as I thought "well at least he's socialising.
I am not suggesting MH and those conditions make this acceptable but I can see why and how they are obviously more at risk.
Yes, since day dot my son has been 100% consistent.
He accepts that he's been a bloody idiot not keeping himself safe/too many platforms and boom here we are. BUT that he is not interested in children sexually.
I do believe him, 99% of me does.
He spent his life online from the age of 12/13, having severe social anxiety, very awkward in social situations, depression and (undiagnosed austism). This is partly my fault as I thought "well at least he's socialising.
I am not suggesting MH and those conditions make this acceptable but I can see why and how they are obviously more at risk.
Conflicted Mum
I can see where you are coming from.
Our 28 year old son had to move back in with us,after living 'independently' for five years & having good employment.
We felt we had no choice,as he has no one else & would have been homeless.
He is currently on remand for an alleged breach of his SHPO (as in not informing police of cloud storage on new laptop) which he disputes..
In some ways the pressure is off us,once we got used to prison visits! We know we can do nothing else at the moment. He is back in court on 16th. If he is released,we are back to square one
I can see where you are coming from.
Our 28 year old son had to move back in with us,after living 'independently' for five years & having good employment.
We felt we had no choice,as he has no one else & would have been homeless.
He is currently on remand for an alleged breach of his SHPO (as in not informing police of cloud storage on new laptop) which he disputes..
In some ways the pressure is off us,once we got used to prison visits! We know we can do nothing else at the moment. He is back in court on 16th. If he is released,we are back to square one
@conflictedmum
That sounds pretty much like our story , my son is 20 , arrested at 18 . Diagnosed autistic after arrest but spent his teens in s similar fashion to your son , we foolishly thought at least if he is at home he's not getting involved with drugs/gangs etc . He's now on SOR and awaiting sentence hearing in a few weeks
That sounds pretty much like our story , my son is 20 , arrested at 18 . Diagnosed autistic after arrest but spent his teens in s similar fashion to your son , we foolishly thought at least if he is at home he's not getting involved with drugs/gangs etc . He's now on SOR and awaiting sentence hearing in a few weeks
Post deleted by user
This link may be of interest to some of you, it highlights some of the vulnerabilities that may be present
in someone on the autistic spectrum with viewing IIOC's online.
https://pure.strath.ac.uk/ws/portalfiles/portal/120954333/Allely_2020_CYCJ_ASD_and_viewing_indecent_images_of_children.pdf
in someone on the autistic spectrum with viewing IIOC's online.
https://pure.strath.ac.uk/ws/portalfiles/portal/120954333/Allely_2020_CYCJ_ASD_and_viewing_indecent_images_of_children.pdf
Hi, my situation is my ex husband. I lost everything, and I mean everything because of what he did and has done again. Some days I despise him. However, this is just one bit of him. The vast majority of him is good. X
My person is my ex and father of my child.
He is adamant that he did not go intentionally looking for things and that it must have been these pop up links that he has chucked on.
Surely it has to be more than that if the police are investigating.
I'm at war with myself as to what I should think. It is a really difficult situation but we wouldn't be human if we didn't have doubts x
He is adamant that he did not go intentionally looking for things and that it must have been these pop up links that he has chucked on.
Surely it has to be more than that if the police are investigating.
I'm at war with myself as to what I should think. It is a really difficult situation but we wouldn't be human if we didn't have doubts x
I have been advised that these images (pop ups) cache into your device. So you can have them unknowingly, however even cached images are treated this seriously.
Think of wattsapp - a person sends you a pic in the group and itsaves to your phone.
There is no evidence of my son searching for this stuff and absolutely nothing anywhere of him trying to communicate with anyone he shouldn't. All cached images.
Think of wattsapp - a person sends you a pic in the group and itsaves to your phone.
There is no evidence of my son searching for this stuff and absolutely nothing anywhere of him trying to communicate with anyone he shouldn't. All cached images.