Family and Friends Forum

Bea x

I am so sorry you have ended up here , I can't offer any advise as it's my son who offended but I know there are many amazing mums on here who will be able to give you some really helpful advice xx

I diddnt want to just read your post and not comment xx

Bea, seek urgent legal advice. You can normally get a free 30 minutes. Google for a solicitor that deals with child and family services - there should be a few times choose from in the area.

Is the child's father currently exercising his PR, i.e. is he having any contact? If not, I think you have a strong argument for him not being told. If he is, then it is more complicated and legal advice is essential

Barnados charity can advocate for the child if over I believe 12 years of age if this is helpful.

Apologies I don't think I can help further x

Hi, gosh i hope you're ok. Unfortunately this is the case for us too. My daughters havent seen thei biological in over 2 years, and somehow the social worker has him hugely involved, lies made up about my partner ( who was the person arrested for iioc). I'm so sorry they are doing this to you. I spent months and months explaining the dangers that would come with telling him etc, and with him not using his PR with contact/ providing etc. I would try and get an order against him, prohibited steps?

My ex has been arrested since his being notified, and the social worker is still fighting his corner as opposed so listening to me and the children!!

But i know what it feels like, and still being in it, It is dreadful and i am sorry they haven't listened to you. Take care x

I'm so sorry you're going through this. Definitely seem legal advice. Depending on the age of your child and what level of knowledge they have in your scenario could their wishes be taken into consideration? I.e. they don't want dad to know? Is there anyone else within the family network or someone who you could take with you to one if your meetings with social services who can verify/support your concerns about informing your child's father?

A. , I could have written the first half of your post. My ex/absent father was disclosed. We are in processing therefore he has 400 page odd paperwork handed to him, all personal information and every single detail without a deduction because he has PR which he had not exercised at all over 10+ years.

DV was a matter with my ex. When it comes to me social services claimed I simply don't know what a healthy relationship is and unable to protect the children. When it comes to my ex they said 'oh it was so long ago.'

Effectively they wanted to take my child and hand them over to an absent father. He said no thanks.

Bea. I am sorry I have no advise. It's horrible. It is really difficult to stand by our partners without the added complications as this on a good day but if any help, you are not alone.

How are you doing Bea?

just wanting to send some love and support and check in with you.