Very much like this to be the last time
Notifications OFF
I'm gonna keep it short and sweet as I really would like this to be the last time I'm here.
How do I tell a new partner that the ex is on the register, what happened and that I still have contact with them?
Should I have contact with the ex?
It's early stages but I very much care for this person, I could quite easily see them being my forever person and I genuinely didn't think I'd be lucky enough to find someone as amazing as them. they feels the same way.
I'm afraid that they are going to ask me to cut off the occasional friendship I have with the ex and whilst it would very much hurt me to-do, for them, I'd be willing to do that. Especially given their career focus involves an enhanced DBS check.
We do need to chat for shared responsibility reasons but it's not a child and it won't be forever. I feel a great amount of shame for staying even in spite of the fact that the ex worked on himself and is a rehabilitated person. I'm worried that it's going to be something they leave me over.
Logically I know that I need to stand with two feet and just take ownership of my past but the anxiety is hitting a little harder this morning than it should be since I really started to realise I want a future with this new person.
How do I tell a new partner that the ex is on the register, what happened and that I still have contact with them?
Should I have contact with the ex?
It's early stages but I very much care for this person, I could quite easily see them being my forever person and I genuinely didn't think I'd be lucky enough to find someone as amazing as them. they feels the same way.
I'm afraid that they are going to ask me to cut off the occasional friendship I have with the ex and whilst it would very much hurt me to-do, for them, I'd be willing to do that. Especially given their career focus involves an enhanced DBS check.
We do need to chat for shared responsibility reasons but it's not a child and it won't be forever. I feel a great amount of shame for staying even in spite of the fact that the ex worked on himself and is a rehabilitated person. I'm worried that it's going to be something they leave me over.
Logically I know that I need to stand with two feet and just take ownership of my past but the anxiety is hitting a little harder this morning than it should be since I really started to realise I want a future with this new person.
Blackhound x
You are putting so much pressure on yourself trying to pre empt the what ifs
You deserve to have the happiness you so deserve, this journey was brought about with your ex actions, you are amazing to still be supportive to him and I think that is huge for both of you
With your new person you seem to both care for each other so much and I wish you both all very best, new beginnings
Talking is so important and while its not an easy discussion it is one you want to raise give as much or as little detail that is comfortable for you
I am sure there will be an answer to the dilemma you are feeling and it will sort itself out
The most important person in all of this is you x
You are putting so much pressure on yourself trying to pre empt the what ifs
You deserve to have the happiness you so deserve, this journey was brought about with your ex actions, you are amazing to still be supportive to him and I think that is huge for both of you
With your new person you seem to both care for each other so much and I wish you both all very best, new beginnings
Talking is so important and while its not an easy discussion it is one you want to raise give as much or as little detail that is comfortable for you
I am sure there will be an answer to the dilemma you are feeling and it will sort itself out
The most important person in all of this is you x
Thank you Upset.
I really appreciate the response. I do need to raise it, but just need to take time to do it... I don't want to go into the full details I don't think either.
Much appreciated
I really appreciate the response. I do need to raise it, but just need to take time to do it... I don't want to go into the full details I don't think either.
Much appreciated
Thank you Upset.
I really appreciate the response. I do need to raise it, but just need to take time to do it... I don't want to go into the full details I don't think either.
Much appreciated
I really appreciate the response. I do need to raise it, but just need to take time to do it... I don't want to go into the full details I don't think either.
Much appreciated
Blackhound, your past has helped shape you into the person you are today and is something to embrace. I understand your fears in losing the new person in your life but you now have the opportunity to build a new relationship based on openness and honesty. Why not start by telling him your story and take it from there.
I have met someone who could become a partner. They already know what has happened so I didn't have to explain anything. I'm keeping him at arms length just now as not sure if I am ready for another relationship. Sounds like he will be patient.
I want to be completely honest and upfront with this person right from the start. It appears my marriage has lots of lies.
We deserve to find some happiness. Hopefully you can resolve your dilemma but I firmly believe in being honest from the outset otherwise it might be harder to explain your actions further down the line.
I want to be completely honest and upfront with this person right from the start. It appears my marriage has lots of lies.
We deserve to find some happiness. Hopefully you can resolve your dilemma but I firmly believe in being honest from the outset otherwise it might be harder to explain your actions further down the line.