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Bail conditions make us question his every move

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Ajustcopingparent

Member since
August 2024

115 posts

The solicitor wanted our 16yr old released for under further investigation. But police decided to set bail. He's 16 and his condition states no unsupervised contact with under 16s with exception of college and his sibling.

Now we may be reading too much into this. But how does this work in normal life. He goes to college, only just started, quiet child so no friends as yet. Partner questioned is he ok going for a walk at lunch time on his own around town. My view is yeah he's just walking, won't talk to anyone unless buying something from a shop.

He's anxious child as it is so going into town that's big step for him. If we stop him then that would have negative impact on his mental health. We had only prior to the knock got to stage where he would stay home alone, albeit for about 20mins.

Like many we never expected to be in this situation. Those who've seen my previous posts will know he's quiet child whose reported items that violate snapchat. This is where we think the link is. We now authorise any Internet access or apps for both kids which is proving difficult with him at college but he's happy with that so for now it's what we do. Even his younger sibling doesn't question it.

I had night out last night, longest period I've left him but all this was preying on my mind. Together with when I start work and won't have access to my phone.

Just want it over.

Posted Wed September 11, 2024 8:16amReport post

Holdingthegrenade

Member since
June 2024

200 posts

Hi just

Do you have the contact details for the officer in charge....they will be able to explain what the bail conditions are and you can ask some scenario based examples. It means they're not allowed unsupervised access so being alone with others without an adult or someone who is safeguarding in the room. So they'll be allowed at college in classes etc when others and teachers are there and public places like out in town shops and cafes etc for lunch but won't be allowed to say go round a friends house when nobody is in or have anyone over for studying unless you or someone else is supervising the whole time.



Sadly bail and under investigation if it comes with restrictions means the rules are to protect others from your person; unfortunately their priority isn't your child's mental health or wellbeing or ability to make friends; it's everyone else's safety that they're likely to come in contact with first and your young persons second. :(

Posted Wed September 11, 2024 8:46am
Edited Wed September 11, 2024 8:48amReport post

Crushed

Member since
July 2024

148 posts

Hi, did they say why they wanted him to have bail conditions rather than RUI? Xx

Posted Wed September 11, 2024 9:06amReport post

Ajustcopingparent

Member since
August 2024

115 posts

Hi Yeah I tried contacting officer but they never replied. Spoke to solicitor instead who clarified. We've had to changed once because it was too unclear and restricting for college.

Reason they gave for it being bail was because they take these things serious. Not got much faith in them and just wish we had an idea what it was. Because all we are thinking is snapchat because of the time frame they spoke of and if he reported something that violated who sent it him.

All they said is if nothing on devices that's end of it.

Posted Wed September 11, 2024 10:27pm
Edited Wed September 11, 2024 10:48pmReport post

Crushed

Member since
July 2024

148 posts

Wondering how they decide bail or RUI, my son was RUI...maybe different areas etc xx

Posted Wed September 11, 2024 11:05pmReport post

Ajustcopingparent

Member since
August 2024

115 posts

Think they just do what they want. Solicitor said one area tell him what it is they have even at this stage but one covering our area have said nothing. We are just going on little bits of info they gave us. Until devices checked nothing we can do.

Posted Wed September 11, 2024 11:09pmReport post

Just want an end to it

Member since
October 2023

225 posts

Bail is until they can be sure there is no safeguarding risks, once that is discovered, then it goes to RUI. My son had to move to a family members for 5 months until they had devices searched for risk to my other children and then it was dropped to RUI and he could move back. I think it does depend on duristrictions of the force though as there does seem to be differences.

Posted Wed September 11, 2024 11:11pm
Edited Wed September 11, 2024 11:11pmReport post

Ajustcopingparent

Member since
August 2024

115 posts

My sons at home still and bail condition states he's ok around his 13yr old sibling.

Posted Wed September 11, 2024 11:30pmReport post

Quick exit