Anyone else lost?
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I feel after all of this that I lost such a big part of myself, I don't know who I am anymore. I've no confidence. I've spent 20 minutes crying over the fact I've left a 24 pack of quilted toilet roll in Aldi and therefore wasted a fiver.
I'm beating myself up any chance I get right now. I feel I'm continually messing up at work and I feel ridiculously vulnerable and paranoid. Like I believe everyone either dislikes me, is mad at me or finds me useless. Maybe it's just me who believes all that.
How do you fight your inner demons? Has it got worse for you since the knock? At times I feel so angry about it all. I don't know me anymore. I feel pathetic today and I hate that.
I'm beating myself up any chance I get right now. I feel I'm continually messing up at work and I feel ridiculously vulnerable and paranoid. Like I believe everyone either dislikes me, is mad at me or finds me useless. Maybe it's just me who believes all that.
How do you fight your inner demons? Has it got worse for you since the knock? At times I feel so angry about it all. I don't know me anymore. I feel pathetic today and I hate that.
Hey,
I 100% know where you're coming from.
i've chosen to stand my mr mainly because we don't have kids atm and we have been through a lot individually but our relationship makes us stronger. After the knock he was given bail I met him afterwards and he was completely open and honest with me. Answered every question I had the best he could even when it was difficult to say or hear.
stop it now have helped us so much but we are currently in the waiting game stage. We're waiting for forensics to finish their investigation so that he can start the actual court process but recently I've been feeling down, withdrawn and like you mentioned paranoid and less confident in myself.
its like all of this is constantly on my mind and I can't seem to get away from it. As much as I want the court dates and stuff so it can be over I'm also glad it's not happening yet so that maybe we can have Christmas together before it (and if the media finds out and starts spreading it everywhere)
As much as I love and support him (with getting the right help) sometimes I just get extremely angry that he's putting me through this and even worse that I'm choosing to put myself through it.
i guess what I'm trying to say is that there is a lot of complex emotions involved but not everyday is horrific and like anything else time will heal all wounds. Eventually things will get better as long as we all keep fighting, looking for that silver lining and support one another the best we can
love and hugs x
I 100% know where you're coming from.
i've chosen to stand my mr mainly because we don't have kids atm and we have been through a lot individually but our relationship makes us stronger. After the knock he was given bail I met him afterwards and he was completely open and honest with me. Answered every question I had the best he could even when it was difficult to say or hear.
stop it now have helped us so much but we are currently in the waiting game stage. We're waiting for forensics to finish their investigation so that he can start the actual court process but recently I've been feeling down, withdrawn and like you mentioned paranoid and less confident in myself.
its like all of this is constantly on my mind and I can't seem to get away from it. As much as I want the court dates and stuff so it can be over I'm also glad it's not happening yet so that maybe we can have Christmas together before it (and if the media finds out and starts spreading it everywhere)
As much as I love and support him (with getting the right help) sometimes I just get extremely angry that he's putting me through this and even worse that I'm choosing to put myself through it.
i guess what I'm trying to say is that there is a lot of complex emotions involved but not everyday is horrific and like anything else time will heal all wounds. Eventually things will get better as long as we all keep fighting, looking for that silver lining and support one another the best we can
love and hugs x
Hi Hisangel
I’m in exactly the same boat as you, our waiting is almost over, 11 months in and he has finally been called for interview in a couple of weeks. As much as I want to make this work, I’m getting tired now, I dread to think how I will feel next year when our bubble explodes.
I’m in exactly the same boat as you, our waiting is almost over, 11 months in and he has finally been called for interview in a couple of weeks. As much as I want to make this work, I’m getting tired now, I dread to think how I will feel next year when our bubble explodes.
Bubble,
I feel your pain. Reading your post is like reading my own. Every single word is exactly how I'm feeling.
Try to keep busy, one day at a time. Your post was a few days ago so I hope you're not in such a bad place today. Take care of yourself. You matter. Very much xx
I feel your pain. Reading your post is like reading my own. Every single word is exactly how I'm feeling.
Try to keep busy, one day at a time. Your post was a few days ago so I hope you're not in such a bad place today. Take care of yourself. You matter. Very much xx