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How do we move on?

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Looking for Help

Member since
November 2023

34 posts

Posted Fri October 18, 2024 3:45pmReport post

Next month will be a year from the knock. Life has been on hold since.

SS can't sign us off until the outcome with the police and any charges (though SS know I'm fully committed to my child and have no concerns with that, they just feel they need to stay involved until the outcome so they are there for us both).

I'm petrified of any future media backlash. I know if it all comes out I'll have to explain to more close friends, it's been very limited so far.

I still have to see my OH due to supervised visits and likely always will.

I've separated from my OH since the knock. How do I move on with the above all hanging over our head?

K4

Member since
October 2022

617 posts

Posted Fri October 18, 2024 4:54pmReport post

I have no particular advice apart from taking each day as it comes. The waiting and fear of media is the worst.



im sorry you're feeling it at the moment.



Do you have much support?



x

Looking for Help

Member since
November 2023

34 posts

Posted Fri October 18, 2024 5:08pmReport post

I really do have lots of support, or as much as possible with not many people knowing.



You just feel it at times. Like school holidays, when friends are going out as a family unit and you would have normally joined them etc. And with limited childcare it also makes it difficult to get out on my own for some down time.



It really is a lonely time, even when you are surrounded by your family and close friends.

Tryingtobebrave

Member since
July 2024

11 posts

Posted Sat October 19, 2024 7:58amReport post

Wanted to reply as feel very much the same! Don't have any advice really, just wanted to say you aren't alone. It's hard not having time to yourself and since the knock my children have found it hard to leave me. I find no adult conversation all evening hard too.
My counsellor said it's like you are grieving but the person is still there which makes it hard to move, especially when you have to see them to supervise visits with the children.
I still feel I'm putting OH needs above my own, making sure he sees the children regularly even though it feels like another pressure on me to organise and make time for it. One day in the future I'll have to rethink what happens around supervision as can't imagine having to sort it every weekend for the next however many years! Love and strength to you x

LittleRobin3

Member since
April 2024

323 posts

Posted Mon October 21, 2024 11:32amReport post

Hi, we've been in limbo for almost three years now. Pre sentencing report meeting with probation is on Thursday and then the sentencing will be soon after. 3 years of hell. This is the second time I've been through this too. Last time his case was plastered across social media and the press 6 weeks after sentencing. It's by far my biggest fear. It's so terribly unfair on us. X