How could he do this??
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Hello I'm very new to this and am really struggling.
The man I've known for 7 years is not who I thought he was. We worked together for four years and became very close during that time over the last four years he has been my very best friend and we where together for the last two. There was never anything that made me question his character in all this time.
A few months ago I found a bearly legal Reddit thread on his phone and I spoke to him about it l. He said he knew that was wrong and that he wouldn't do anything like. I asked him out right are you a peodophile?? And he promised me he wasn't. I believed him and took it as that it was a stupid click while looking for smut to read.
He was staying in my house for the last month as a trail living together and it was going really well. I was really excited about our future and all our plans for it. There where never any signs.
Until Friday when I opened his laptop and saw he has left open his downloaded file page. There were locked icons that where odd and some video icons. I found three videos that where unlocked. I saw what was on them. - I now know form Google the videos I saw are category B.
I spoke rang him and when asked how they got on there "I think you know" is all he could say and then him pleading "please this isn't me" but it is him he did it.
I reported him myself and now I can barely function. I can't have him in my life anymore beyond this but all I want is my best friend back and I never can because of this.
How do I get these images out of my head?? How bad where the locked ones?? How could he do this and I never knew?? How do I get past this?? Please help me.
The man I've known for 7 years is not who I thought he was. We worked together for four years and became very close during that time over the last four years he has been my very best friend and we where together for the last two. There was never anything that made me question his character in all this time.
A few months ago I found a bearly legal Reddit thread on his phone and I spoke to him about it l. He said he knew that was wrong and that he wouldn't do anything like. I asked him out right are you a peodophile?? And he promised me he wasn't. I believed him and took it as that it was a stupid click while looking for smut to read.
He was staying in my house for the last month as a trail living together and it was going really well. I was really excited about our future and all our plans for it. There where never any signs.
Until Friday when I opened his laptop and saw he has left open his downloaded file page. There were locked icons that where odd and some video icons. I found three videos that where unlocked. I saw what was on them. - I now know form Google the videos I saw are category B.
I spoke rang him and when asked how they got on there "I think you know" is all he could say and then him pleading "please this isn't me" but it is him he did it.
I reported him myself and now I can barely function. I can't have him in my life anymore beyond this but all I want is my best friend back and I never can because of this.
How do I get these images out of my head?? How bad where the locked ones?? How could he do this and I never knew?? How do I get past this?? Please help me.
Oh sweetheart. I feel you. But I have been with this *person* for nearly 17 years.
My whole life is a lie.
He is out tonight doing karaoke, a thing that we have enjoyed together countless times. I cannot be seen with him. He messaged me today saying that he had a little cry today. For the first time. At the absolute shit show our lives have become.
If you can imagine the rage I feel?
My whole life is a lie.
He is out tonight doing karaoke, a thing that we have enjoyed together countless times. I cannot be seen with him. He messaged me today saying that he had a little cry today. For the first time. At the absolute shit show our lives have become.
If you can imagine the rage I feel?
I can only say I'm really sorry for what you're going through.
I've been with my husband for 17 years. We have little children. He is bipolar and I worked my a** off to support him. Been on his side through an unrelated custodial sentence.
We always laughed it was love at first sight. We'd randomly text each other at the same time. We were thinking the same way. We were a team. He was never very sex driven and that part of our lives was pretty much nonexistent since the children were born. We were always so tired, but very affectionate with each other. Always laughing. Having adventures as a family. We were... a lie.
The knock came last week. I'm barely holding my head above the water. No money. Poor health. Kids to look after.
All I can think is that it's a nightmare now, but we are safe from him.
I don't know who he is. I was living with an imposter and predator and had no idea.
My kids suffer and I'm a target for abuse from people I considered friends. I'm completely alone. Confided in one person and my daughter lost her best friend as a result.
I'm taking it very slowly. Cut off all contact with him. Blocked his ability to send us letters or call. Not because I'm a woman scorned, but I won't let him deceive us anymore.
Life will never be the same, but I no longer live in a lie.
And I'm teaching my kids that we can give a person a chance, but if they hurt you again, they do not love you no matter what they say.
I just wish people stopped blaming me and ostracizing my children. We are survivors of silent abuse and victims of cruel manipulation, not enablers of child abuse.
I've been with my husband for 17 years. We have little children. He is bipolar and I worked my a** off to support him. Been on his side through an unrelated custodial sentence.
We always laughed it was love at first sight. We'd randomly text each other at the same time. We were thinking the same way. We were a team. He was never very sex driven and that part of our lives was pretty much nonexistent since the children were born. We were always so tired, but very affectionate with each other. Always laughing. Having adventures as a family. We were... a lie.
The knock came last week. I'm barely holding my head above the water. No money. Poor health. Kids to look after.
All I can think is that it's a nightmare now, but we are safe from him.
I don't know who he is. I was living with an imposter and predator and had no idea.
My kids suffer and I'm a target for abuse from people I considered friends. I'm completely alone. Confided in one person and my daughter lost her best friend as a result.
I'm taking it very slowly. Cut off all contact with him. Blocked his ability to send us letters or call. Not because I'm a woman scorned, but I won't let him deceive us anymore.
Life will never be the same, but I no longer live in a lie.
And I'm teaching my kids that we can give a person a chance, but if they hurt you again, they do not love you no matter what they say.
I just wish people stopped blaming me and ostracizing my children. We are survivors of silent abuse and victims of cruel manipulation, not enablers of child abuse.
I've just seen your response and I'm so sorry you have to go through this. I can't imagine how hard it would be to have a family and home with them. We had a pregnancy scare just before I discovered it andwas devastated when it was negative even though we weren't in a position to be parents just yet. He was so supportive and saying if it was positive we'd just be three years ahead in our plan children wise, now his response to it makes me question everything.
But I'm glad you've got out and stopped him from contacting you. I'm sorry your daughter has lost friends too. This really seems to f**k over everyone close to them. Please feel free to message me directly any time. You did the right thing for yourself and child, be proud.
But I'm glad you've got out and stopped him from contacting you. I'm sorry your daughter has lost friends too. This really seems to f**k over everyone close to them. Please feel free to message me directly any time. You did the right thing for yourself and child, be proud.
Thank you. It's really hard right now. I know it will get better in time, but it's so difficult to be strong for my children when all I want to do is cry.