Family and Friends Forum

Tabs

Member since
November 2019

501 posts

Posted Mon November 25, 2019 10:20amReport post

My husband was arrested and released pending investigation following a vigilante sting. He had to leave home immediately. Is now some distance away and undergoing therapy. I have not seen him since. He lost his job immediately. He is now fully immersed in self help and therapy work. He is broken and can only see the very worst of himself. Is this normal? He is desperate to understand how he got to this place, as am I. I seem to agitate him when I question him. He is desperate for a future with me, but I can't make any decisions until I know the full story. All I know is he had an on-line sex addiction, he recently disclosed this. He has no idea what led him to meet vigilantes.

Partner

Member since
July 2019

221 posts

Posted Mon November 25, 2019 7:19pmReport post

Sorry to hear this.

I hope your okay? This is such a horrible process. I'm the other way, no contact from the knock but now wondering if it's possible for us to have a future. However I'm yet to know what he's accused of. So hard all of this.

I spoke to the police investigator today, who is fantastic, and I asked if there was any timeframe and he should have an update next week. I desperately want to hear his side. I've been given permission to contact him but I'm.not sure whether to.

World turned upside down.

I really hope your ok.

X

Tabs

Member since
November 2019

501 posts

Posted Mon November 25, 2019 7:32pmReport post

Hi Partner, I'm doing ok thank you. It's a horrid place to be isn't it? You can't just switch off your feelings about someone. It is such a huge thing to deal with. I hope your partner is doing better than mine and has some support? That's the worst thing for me, the fact that is so isolated, and feels so ashamed. He thinks everyone will reject him. Hope you're ok? I read your story, and I'm so sorry for what you're going through right now.
Let's hope we all get some good news soon.

xxx

Partner

Member since
July 2019

221 posts

Posted Mon November 25, 2019 8:37pmReport post

Hi, thank you for your message of support.

I completely get how you can't switch the feelings off. Despite my shock and hurt, I worried so much that he was okay. Knowing him, I wanted to know he was still at work. Without that he would have gone under. No, I doubt he's told anyone. I believe he will have pushed it to the back of his mind and that's it. I really have no idea if he's okay. For that reason I want to reach out too. But I'm scared of reaching out and opening up a can of worms. I hope chatting on here helps you as much as me. It's such a relief to offload and share with others who know and understand. Have you ever called the helpline for support? Xx