Friendship
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For the last few months I've felt anger, disgust, shock and sadness (alot of anger). I have started a divorce and only talk to OH about financial matters.
But I've had this weird urge to call him and I feel almost sorry for him when I think he really has no-one apart from his parents, it makes me really sad for him. But I don't want to feel that way. I want to not want to talk to him ever again if that makes sense. It's so confusing.
Plus my family and friends would not understand they thinks he's disgusting and they mean more to me than anything.
I just wondered what others experiences advice was?
But I've had this weird urge to call him and I feel almost sorry for him when I think he really has no-one apart from his parents, it makes me really sad for him. But I don't want to feel that way. I want to not want to talk to him ever again if that makes sense. It's so confusing.
Plus my family and friends would not understand they thinks he's disgusting and they mean more to me than anything.
I just wondered what others experiences advice was?
Lrf x
Your feelings are normal, it's a huge shock to find yourself here
The decision is only yours to make
This journey is horrendous and not one of us wants to be here
In my situation it's my son who offended
The relationship you had of course there is the emotions you feel, but also the compassion to know he has just his parents , however as hard as it is only you can decide on what to do
By reaching out dosent condone what he has done , support is so so important on this journey
If you reach out just to check in dosent mean you forgive him , the emotions we go through is so hard , but to know he is coping will set your mind at ease
One day at a time xx
Your feelings are normal, it's a huge shock to find yourself here
The decision is only yours to make
This journey is horrendous and not one of us wants to be here
In my situation it's my son who offended
The relationship you had of course there is the emotions you feel, but also the compassion to know he has just his parents , however as hard as it is only you can decide on what to do
By reaching out dosent condone what he has done , support is so so important on this journey
If you reach out just to check in dosent mean you forgive him , the emotions we go through is so hard , but to know he is coping will set your mind at ease
One day at a time xx
Hi, I felt really sorry for my ex who blew up my entire life - 30 years with him and 4 children - and then he reoffended. I feel pity for him now. Pity that he can't control himself when he's super stressed. I don't buy the addiction excuse. Nothing in the world could ever make a child sexual to me. Nothing. I no longer feel sorry for him but unfortunately, he's still very much in our lives. I wish it weren't so. X
Thankyou for your replies, I actually feel the same way about the addiction theory, I feel like it's used as a crutch because it's easier to look at an addict in the mirror than a P. And therapist feel it's easier to get someone to work on being an addict than admit they are a P. Also the research is small studies funded by organisations that could have bias.
So I feel this way on and off and then I try to imagine anyone watching this material and getting a 'kick' out of it, children in pain being violated and I can't even imagine how that would be possible :'( or what kind of person could watch that over and over again and seek it out for pleasure.
He has admitted to getting a sexual kick from the material and there was 1000s of images across categories found. Saying it now I feel horrible for ever 'feeling sorry' that he's alone when he's left me in such a mess picking up our children and life as a single parent with no support system.
I don't know how my mind swings to 'maybe I should check in' I wish it wouldn't. And I've decided I'm not going to do it.
So I feel this way on and off and then I try to imagine anyone watching this material and getting a 'kick' out of it, children in pain being violated and I can't even imagine how that would be possible :'( or what kind of person could watch that over and over again and seek it out for pleasure.
He has admitted to getting a sexual kick from the material and there was 1000s of images across categories found. Saying it now I feel horrible for ever 'feeling sorry' that he's alone when he's left me in such a mess picking up our children and life as a single parent with no support system.
I don't know how my mind swings to 'maybe I should check in' I wish it wouldn't. And I've decided I'm not going to do it.
I felt sorry for my person when he was released from prison for the same reasons as you - he had nothing and no one else
Thankfully it didn't last. I now feel indifferent. I will be starting divorce proceedings in the new year.
This journey is a rollercoaster of emotions - it's so hard.
Thankfully it didn't last. I now feel indifferent. I will be starting divorce proceedings in the new year.
This journey is a rollercoaster of emotions - it's so hard.