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Christmas approaches

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Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2596 posts

Posted Sun November 17, 2024 7:02amReport post

Today I will walk round the shops - see the bright lights - soak up the atmosphere of the Christmas market. Watch families walk round, witness their closeness and the children's excitement. See happy mums & dads, brothers & sisters, grandparents. In the past I was the same, family unit intact.

i remember when my kids were young, the build up and preparation - excitement of Santa's arrival, present opening frenzy. Writing our cards with four names. The closeness of my children.

Yes I have much to look forward to in 2024, but the sadness will haunt me, the memories (although happy ones) will make my heart secretly swell with sadness. My children's relationship has been blasted and the love between them gone forever.

Another Christmas lost with my son with only a measly call from prison, trying to be upbeat and cheerful then facing the gap as the family gather. Always feeling slightly awkward and 'on edge', being careful not to say the wrong thing - even though I know they love me very much. Perhaps secretly locked in their own thoughts and putting on their own brave face.

Sorry to be such a bloody misery but I'm sure others feel the same as the festivities approach. It must be such a hard time for so many people that are or have gone through troubles in their lives and not just suffered our set of problems.

Still a time to pull open a draw and put those big girl knickers on....... I'm sure I'll be grabbing something to eat and treating myself to a nice cup of frothy coffee - a must for mood improvement!!!!!

Edited Sun November 17, 2024 7:23am

Upset mum

Member since
June 2020

2422 posts

Posted Sun November 17, 2024 9:26amReport post

Smile my dear friend x

Your post resonates with so many of us xx

We will always have moments of sadness but we also have so much to be grateful for, small steps each day xx

We are so fortunate to be able to hear our sons voices on the end of a phonecall, as we know there are many that no longer have that xx

Big pants on, deep breath, and think of how far in this journey you have come, you will always be surrounded by love xx

Deffinatly a trip out for a coffee is just what you need xx

Seaside

Member since
July 2022

566 posts

Posted Sun November 17, 2024 4:22pmReport post

Smile my dear friend your words really resonate with me- it was a week before Christmas 3 years ago that my life was torn apart by the knock on the door.

Christmas is such a difficult time for so many people for a huge variety of reasons and my heart goes out to everyone who is finding it hard.

I try to take comfort in the fact that my son is still here , we are 2 years post sentencing and although I often feel that I am living a lie and having to pretend to others that everything is okay ( nobody except immediate family and 2 close friends know) which is exhausting we move forward together.

A huge hug sent to you and love always xx

You should be proud of your son and the effort he is putting into changing his life although I know how hard it is for you .

Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2596 posts

Posted Sun November 17, 2024 4:44pmReport post

Once again I think of others and the 17 yr old that was stabbed in his chest - in our city early hours this morning - poor lad in a critical condition.

kinda puts things in perspective...

Edited Sun November 17, 2024 4:51pm

Ocean

Member since
September 2023

792 posts

Posted Sun November 17, 2024 8:39pmReport post

Oh Smile, my heart goes out to you and Upset and anyone else on here whose loved ones are in similar situations.