Should we move
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We are about 6 weeks post knock I feel we have no choice but to sell our house if I have any chance of protecting our children from this. I have it on the market. OH not allowed unsupervised time with kids even though social services not worried about him being a risk is in his bail conditions. So he has to stay away at night.
Policeman comment on knock day to me was be careful who you tell or you'll have your windows out through.
The phone was sent off because of a chat they found where some images were query under 18 they did a quick check on arrest day. My OH says any images may be 16+ but obviously will be impossible for anyone to know real ages and are actually peoples holiday snaps they have posted themselves such as bikini selfies.
The thought of what will happen to my teens is literally killing me I feel like they'd be better off if we were both dead.
Policeman comment on knock day to me was be careful who you tell or you'll have your windows out through.
The phone was sent off because of a chat they found where some images were query under 18 they did a quick check on arrest day. My OH says any images may be 16+ but obviously will be impossible for anyone to know real ages and are actually peoples holiday snaps they have posted themselves such as bikini selfies.
The thought of what will happen to my teens is literally killing me I feel like they'd be better off if we were both dead.
I'm so sorry that u find yourself here, please don't thibk your children would be better off without u they will need you more than youl know and trust me you will find the strength to protect them, this is a horrible situation for everyone to suffer but please remember you have done nothing wrong, if you feel you would be safer moving then that choice is yours to make it's a difficult journey it really is and no one can understand your pain like us on this site will because it's emotions you cannot explain. I spoke with a lady from stop it now and she was amazing , I would advise you get yourself some help to help you in this situation then you will know what the right thing to do for you as a family will be , I can't offer anything else other than that I'm afraid my experience is not a good one and there's things I wished we had done as a family prior to a lot of stuff happening that did but unfortunately we didn't expect things to turn out the way they did , but please get some help and your children most definitely need you , my mother god bless her was our backbone through all of this I don't know how she's isn't and wasn't severely ill she's one strong lady I can say that much through all of this is there anyone close to you that you can trust and lean on for any type of support at all xxz
Thank you so much for responding. What did you wish you had done if you don't mind me asking? X
I wished we had gotten our family member away from his house so what occurred that night didn't it was terrible what people were allowed to do, because of the media report also they left parts out that could have made the situation more clear but the let people run with what they printed which was intentional in our eyes because they new he wasn't looking for it, searching for it, downloading or sharing anything, they sat in court and listened to all of it read out but didn't publish that in their media posts they got their click bait and our lives got destroyed xxx
That's awful I'm so sorry did it go on for a long time?
no, 1 night large crowd , small village also very upsetting mostly idiots there if I am honest people with their own sins but that is another story , no regard for family etc but it's done now that was over a year ago worst time of our lives but you find thr strength to move on there's a million other things happened in the village since then, Facebook is toxic like all social media just a place to spread hate. lies and misinformation and cause more damage for families but we move forward, this doesn't happen everywhere or to everyone but it did in our case unfortunately the media should be made to post everything and not just a short transcript in some cases but people like to add arms and legs the minute anything negative is published , yes punishment for crimes are deserved especially when it's horrific but with social media people don't want to know the truth it's always just a reason to hate it can be useful yes but in the village where my family live it's just toxic deprived area
I can't imagine being in a position to be able to do so. The Police put a "marker " on my property post knock. That alerted my housing association. They then visited threatening me with eviction. If I had a choice in the matter, I'd move for memory reasons alone. I couldn't protect my children from it because it was across all social media and the press during a half term so my poor children had to return to school with everyone knowing what their father had done. If I could, I'd move, very very far away. X
However, I couldn't give a stuff what anyone thinks! My problem is the roof over my head. X
How old are your children, how did they cope that sounds awful for you all?
We moved away I moved from the house it happened in after I was overwhelmed by the memories I was in hospital weeks and moved as soon as I could when I got out. My body was physically reacting to the trauma I associated to that house. And in the end I left the area as my child was targeted due to this and thier other vulnerabilities. I came back to my home town and I'm so glad that I did.
I'm still in the marital house - I cannot call it home.
When the story broke the property was graffitied. When he was in prison I was burgled. All as a direct consequence of his offending.
I hate living here. For 3 years it has simply been somewhere I sleep, where my things are but where I try to spend as little as possible
I'm finally getting ready to sell. Take my half of the proceeds and finally move on and have a fresh start.
But now I'm worried that people will see the property for sale and out 2 and 2 together - it's a very small community. Brings it all back to the surface again
When the story broke the property was graffitied. When he was in prison I was burgled. All as a direct consequence of his offending.
I hate living here. For 3 years it has simply been somewhere I sleep, where my things are but where I try to spend as little as possible
I'm finally getting ready to sell. Take my half of the proceeds and finally move on and have a fresh start.
But now I'm worried that people will see the property for sale and out 2 and 2 together - it's a very small community. Brings it all back to the surface again
My partners first offence 10 years ago (wasn't with at the time only met him 7 years ago) was in the media.
People in the town we live in still cause us problems now 10 years on.
I have a police marker on my address. Theirs one on his and his ex wife's.
Social have helped me to get on a council list in a city away from where we are now.
I will be glad to move. Although sad as there are many good things about the area we live in but I can't constantly life in fear that someone's going to say something in front of our little girl again. ( when we went to drop his kids of a couple of moths ago we got abused by his exes neighbours and their kids joined into we had to get the police to help us leave safely we had our 2 year old with us. And his kids (12,11,10) witnessed it too)
It's so hard. I get why people have an issue with it but at the same time people can change. But seems like in others eyes he's a horrible person for life.
People in the town we live in still cause us problems now 10 years on.
I have a police marker on my address. Theirs one on his and his ex wife's.
Social have helped me to get on a council list in a city away from where we are now.
I will be glad to move. Although sad as there are many good things about the area we live in but I can't constantly life in fear that someone's going to say something in front of our little girl again. ( when we went to drop his kids of a couple of moths ago we got abused by his exes neighbours and their kids joined into we had to get the police to help us leave safely we had our 2 year old with us. And his kids (12,11,10) witnessed it too)
It's so hard. I get why people have an issue with it but at the same time people can change. But seems like in others eyes he's a horrible person for life.
My partners story was in the local paper to. He had 19 photos from 6 years ago he had no idea about. The paper printed what would look the worst. This got shared and every one found out. We live in the same house but the love of the house has gone away. We have had support from out family's but have lost friends. Which was the worst. We carry on every day like it hasn't happened to us but then come very low days. It's the thought of others that kills us the over thinking. My children had to go to school with it all shared around the school. Which Broke my heart.the school was amazing and nothing happened. Some new gossip soon came around and they was on to the next.the thought never leave my head with what we should of done or how different our lives would be if it wasn't in the paper. I miss my friend every single day some days more then others. As I we would talk every day. We have good days and bad. Our days are the same as they where but it's a lot to get over. The day they knocked our lives changed for ever. I wouldn't wish this on anyone. We smile but when we look at each other we both know what's going on inside. Every day has got better but if I owned my home I wouldn't would of moved.