Family and Friends Forum

Beckyk

Member since
December 2019

14 posts

Posted Fri December 13, 2019 12:18amReport post

Hello I'm new to the site but not to the crap that just keeps giving when you have someone in your life who is guilty of commuting this crime, it's my son that's the offender but it feels like I'm being punished too, I accept he will need to fight for his kids to see him but I can't fight and to be truthful it's killing me regarding the connx I have lost with them and it seriously affecting my mental health, just wanted to reach out, my sons court case has been and gone and life in a way has moved on but how do you get through the pain of lost or damaged relationships

SallyBlue

Member since
March 2019

268 posts

Posted Fri December 13, 2019 1:09pmReport post

Beckyk, time heals but even when the case has been and gone the fallout remains. I cant imagine how difficult it is when the offender is your child. It's not something you will ever forget but bridges can be mended x

Noa

Member since
December 2019

15 posts

Posted Fri December 13, 2019 1:34pmReport post

HI Becky

I'm mum to offender - I got the knock 3 days ago - police came in and ceased my son's computer equipment - he's 29 and has been home for a couple of years. I'm devastated, it obvs came right out of the blue, when police told me why they were here I was nearly phsically sick - will know next week if/what charges will ensue, son has admitted it so expecting arrest.

Noa

Member since
December 2019

15 posts

Posted Fri December 13, 2019 6:06pmReport post

Thanks lee1969

Son admitted it to police when they said that there was a record of IP address accessing a site, I was kind of surprised they didn't take all the computers in the house but i guess they can track it to a specific device...it's hard for me to talk to my son about it, and his father isn't responding to texts asking him to get in touch, not that he'd be much help but he does have experience of the criminal justice system whilst i don't...I've asked my son to phone the helpline but he hasn't yet. He also needs to register with local doctors, he didn't bother when he moved back, there's so much he should be doing, he's 29 ffs, i can't do it for him..

Beckyk

Member since
December 2019

14 posts

Posted Fri December 13, 2019 7:02pmReport post

Thanks ladies for all the responses

noa i feel so much for you, I still remember the day I found out, it was like someone had ripped my insides out, it does in a way get easier but challenges still rise to the surface every now and again but what can we do they are our sons and if we don't support Them through This then who will? Even though I want to scream at him look what you have done but I suppose their exclusion is punishment, as mums we just need to keep plodding on

sending love and strength for you in the weeks and months ahead, hope the legal side at least is over quickly



Becky