Changing social worker
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Has anyone ever requested a change of social worker? How did it go? South east area Specifically would be great. There are many reasons I want to request a new one I'm just not sure how it's going to look. I get terrible crippling anxiety when I know she's ringing or coming out to see me. I don't eat or sleep or I really really struggle. She doesn't understand me at all and we don't get on, I just want someone who will listen to me and help me. I'll list a few of my reasons;
First up she told me my person is always going to be a monster he's never going to rehabilitate and sex offenders are unable to ever rehabilitate. She also told me nothing would ever make her stay with a man like that.
She cancels on my last minute, it's been 4 times in the last 2 months.
She told me she doesn't believe a word I say and nothing i say and do will convince her otherwise
She told me she's not there to give me advice on anything and I have to use my own Intuition
She forced me into disclosing my partners offence to people who didn't need to know and then when I told her how they'd reacted and the things they'd said about me how I didn't deserve children she said "do you blame them"
She also told me that because of my partners charge were both on trial and I should get used too professionals calling me a bad parent.
First up she told me my person is always going to be a monster he's never going to rehabilitate and sex offenders are unable to ever rehabilitate. She also told me nothing would ever make her stay with a man like that.
She cancels on my last minute, it's been 4 times in the last 2 months.
She told me she doesn't believe a word I say and nothing i say and do will convince her otherwise
She told me she's not there to give me advice on anything and I have to use my own Intuition
She forced me into disclosing my partners offence to people who didn't need to know and then when I told her how they'd reacted and the things they'd said about me how I didn't deserve children she said "do you blame them"
She also told me that because of my partners charge were both on trial and I should get used too professionals calling me a bad parent.
I don't have any advice, but what a nasty piece of work.
That social worker sounds horrific. I would for sure be asking to change.
That social worker sounds horrific. I would for sure be asking to change.
Yeah I really really want too. I'm just really worried it'll make things worse or they'll refuse to change and I'll have to carry on seeing her and it'll just make things worse.
That's outrageous- she shouldn't be in the job at all with her attitudes and prejudices. How can men rehabilitate and a family move forward successfully with so called professionals like her, which are supposed to be supportive.......
This is awful and she should know better. I'm sure she's breaking all kinds of SW 'codes of practice' here and if you do complain it might help your case to 'quote' various bits found in official documents which her behaviour is clearly breaking. Here is one link I found very quickly which might be helpful if quoted
https://basw.co.uk/policy-practice/standards/code-ethics
but you'd need to trawl through it to find the best bits. For example, quite near the begiining it staes 'Social workers should re?ect and critically evaluate their practice and be aware of their impact on others.' Hmmm, I don't think she's read that bit recently.....
Alternatively contact the family Rights group to ask for some help/advice as people often ask things like this on their forum. They also have a section on how to complain effectively.
Good luck and boo to this nasty person.
https://basw.co.uk/policy-practice/standards/code-ethics
but you'd need to trawl through it to find the best bits. For example, quite near the begiining it staes 'Social workers should re?ect and critically evaluate their practice and be aware of their impact on others.' Hmmm, I don't think she's read that bit recently.....
Alternatively contact the family Rights group to ask for some help/advice as people often ask things like this on their forum. They also have a section on how to complain effectively.
Good luck and boo to this nasty person.
I'm so sorry you are having to go through this. We had a very similar experience with our 1st SW and did eventually complain to her manager. In fact your story is so similar I'm wondering if it's the same person. The complaint was never acknowledged but the SW was moved on and we were allocated another. I think we had 4 in total, 2 were terrible the 3rd not too bad but left suddenly and the 4th one good. I know it's not easy to make a fuss but your SW's manager needs to be made aware of her behaviour.
Was you asking for a new one ever criticised? Or looked bad upon?
I complained and got a new one. The new one wasn't much better but more because she was fresh out of uni and had no idea what she was doing.
Our first one was horrible and I wish I had complained about her a lot sooner as think that my outcome with them wouldn't have been the same with a different social worker.
They refused initially to change but I said I wouldn't let her in to my home unless someone was with me and as that was not always possible they finally changed.
We had one lovely social worker during court proceedings with our little girl she was mad at how we were treated but the managers didn't listen to her she ended up moving back to Cornwall where she was from and back to their social services as she couldn't handle the practices at our local authority.
Our first one was horrible and I wish I had complained about her a lot sooner as think that my outcome with them wouldn't have been the same with a different social worker.
They refused initially to change but I said I wouldn't let her in to my home unless someone was with me and as that was not always possible they finally changed.
We had one lovely social worker during court proceedings with our little girl she was mad at how we were treated but the managers didn't listen to her she ended up moving back to Cornwall where she was from and back to their social services as she couldn't handle the practices at our local authority.
Do you think asking for a new social worker impacted your case and made things worse?
No I don't think it made things worse or impacted it.
The only thing it did was make it easier for me to work with them as I felt less bullied and less stressed when I would see them.
And I knew I stood up for myself and wish I had sooner x
The only thing it did was make it easier for me to work with them as I felt less bullied and less stressed when I would see them.
And I knew I stood up for myself and wish I had sooner x
Thankyou so much! How did you go about requesting a new social worker?
I emailed her manager about it.
Hi, these are deliberate tactics in my opinion to try to get you to walk away from him. That would make her job much much easier. That's literally all they're interested in. In my experience.
Social workers are registered professionals so if you are having serious concerns about their conduct and behaviours there is always the option of raising the concern not only with the organisation that employs them but also with their professional regulator Social Work England. If the concern is serious enough or many people are complaining about the same social worker failing to uphold their code of conduct then the regulator can begin fitness to practice procedings.
How would I go about getting her managers number? I have only ever been given her number and email.
Little Robin, yeah I totally agree but they aren't fair, I'm 29 weeks pregnant and the level of anxiety I feel around her is just ridiculous and ive never suffered with anxiety to this point . I'm not sleeping. I'm barely eating and none of this Is any good for me or the children especially not unborn.
Little Robin, yeah I totally agree but they aren't fair, I'm 29 weeks pregnant and the level of anxiety I feel around her is just ridiculous and ive never suffered with anxiety to this point . I'm not sleeping. I'm barely eating and none of this Is any good for me or the children especially not unborn.
No, they aren't fair. They put my two youngest children through Hell for no reasonable reason. I hear you. X
Did your situation ever get better?
Just an update incase anyone's interested. I hadn't got around to requesting a new social worker I was waiting for a solicitor to get back to me. However today she called me into her office for a chat where she informed me that she is being transfered to a different borough to "handle different cases" and I will have contact with my new social worker next week. I completely understand that they could be worse but I am so so hopeful that they will treat me better. Fingers crossed.
Oh that works out for you! I'll keep fingers crossed you have a better experience with the new SW.
Marauder91.
My 2 youngest were only allowed any sort of contact with him when they turned 16 and even that had so supervised. They're adults now but I can honestly say that what SS's put them through was every bit as harmful as what their dad did. They adored him and he never harmed them in any way until the knock. They desperately needed to see him or speak to him. It was so hard because my 2 older children, 18 and 19 at the time were allowed to see him whenever they wanted. When we visited him in prison, the visiting hall was FULL of very young children visiting other prisoners. They'd literally be sat next to us just a few feet away. How could they justify our own children aged 12 and 14 not being allowed to like all those other children? They were perfectly able to say what they wanted and that their father had never harmed them. I was happy for their older siblings to take them if SS's didn't want me to do it but they wouldn't allow that either. I think their "safeguarding " hysteria has gone too far. I believe it's harmful and extremely damaging.
My 2 youngest were only allowed any sort of contact with him when they turned 16 and even that had so supervised. They're adults now but I can honestly say that what SS's put them through was every bit as harmful as what their dad did. They adored him and he never harmed them in any way until the knock. They desperately needed to see him or speak to him. It was so hard because my 2 older children, 18 and 19 at the time were allowed to see him whenever they wanted. When we visited him in prison, the visiting hall was FULL of very young children visiting other prisoners. They'd literally be sat next to us just a few feet away. How could they justify our own children aged 12 and 14 not being allowed to like all those other children? They were perfectly able to say what they wanted and that their father had never harmed them. I was happy for their older siblings to take them if SS's didn't want me to do it but they wouldn't allow that either. I think their "safeguarding " hysteria has gone too far. I believe it's harmful and extremely damaging.
Yes absolutely. Some times they do more harm than good.
I genuinely believe in certain circumstances such as like this, it's way above their pay grade and they don't actually understand it. They need more training to be able to handle it and see a situation for what it really is and find a way through it that pleases everyone. I do completely understand its their job to protect the children from harm and fully support it, I just think there's different and better ways around it.
I genuinely believe in certain circumstances such as like this, it's way above their pay grade and they don't actually understand it. They need more training to be able to handle it and see a situation for what it really is and find a way through it that pleases everyone. I do completely understand its their job to protect the children from harm and fully support it, I just think there's different and better ways around it.
From reading all of these posts about social services, it seems that people have a harder time with them in many ways than they do with the police and justice system. Fortunately, social services involvement is not something I have to look forward to; however, I have a question more out of professional curiosity than anything.
Can an older teenager refuse to be involved with social services?
Within my work I regularly have to obtain consent from children and also assess and make decisions on whether a child has the ability to make decisions on their own behalf. The law states very clearly that a 16 or 17 year old is to be treated as an adult for the purposes of decision-making and can only have a decision made for them where it can be shown that their capacity is impaired (Mental Capacity Act 2005), for younger children it's down to their level of maturity and understanding about the decision to be made.
So what happens when an older teenager particularly one over 16 tells social services that they fully understand what their relative has done and the implications of this and that they will be having contact with that person whether SS like it or not.
Can an older teenager refuse to be involved with social services?
Within my work I regularly have to obtain consent from children and also assess and make decisions on whether a child has the ability to make decisions on their own behalf. The law states very clearly that a 16 or 17 year old is to be treated as an adult for the purposes of decision-making and can only have a decision made for them where it can be shown that their capacity is impaired (Mental Capacity Act 2005), for younger children it's down to their level of maturity and understanding about the decision to be made.
So what happens when an older teenager particularly one over 16 tells social services that they fully understand what their relative has done and the implications of this and that they will be having contact with that person whether SS like it or not.
26a20.
Obviously, my then 12 and 14 year olds became 16. They wouldn't have gone against what SS's dictated, despite their age and ability to say what they wanted out of fear of the effect it would have on their father. It would probably go against the SHPO. I appreciate that's not exactly what you're asking but thought I'd mention it. X
Obviously, my then 12 and 14 year olds became 16. They wouldn't have gone against what SS's dictated, despite their age and ability to say what they wanted out of fear of the effect it would have on their father. It would probably go against the SHPO. I appreciate that's not exactly what you're asking but thought I'd mention it. X
I get there may be restrictions in place for the person with the conviction that make contact impossible i.e licence conditions, SHPO etc.
My question was more around where these restrictions aren't in place and it's just SS who are not allowing contact, sorry should have made that a bit clearer.
My question was more around where these restrictions aren't in place and it's just SS who are not allowing contact, sorry should have made that a bit clearer.
My children are 8,7&1 so I can't answer from experience however I've spoken to many people on this forum in situations similar to mine where older teens have said they want contact and social services have point blank refused. I think in general social services opinion tends to be that noone understands the risk and sex offenders are master manipulators and everyone's being groomed. Trying to convince them otherwise just seems near on impossible from what I can gather.